


More Than Friends

by kdprovance



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Multi, Not tagging because spoilers., Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-21
Packaged: 2020-11-25 20:41:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 72
Words: 88,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20918297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kdprovance/pseuds/kdprovance
Summary: Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanoff, and Bucky Barnes are connected. There's no use denying it. But, after SHIELD's collapse, things get a little more complicated than any of them expect.UPDATED/EDITED: 10/21/2020





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm excited about this fic! Been working on it for a few months now so I'm thrilled to get it out. :)

**Steve POV**

"Bucky?" I asked, not believing the sight in front of me.

"Who the hell is Bucky?" the man responded, voice rough.

Before I could reply, his arm was up with a gun attached and Sam came flying in, knocking Bucky aside and protecting me. He began to get up to re-aim, when a grenade fired out of nowhere and hit him, launching him somewhere. Sirens were blaring all around and all I could see was my best friend not knowing who he was. I felt like collapsing right there and then, when Rumalow's voice cracked through the silence with, "Drop the shield, Cap! On your knees! Get on your knees! Now! Get down! Get down!" I held my hands up, "Get on your knees! Down!" My knees were locked in place from the shock, but even then, I refused to be cowed by Rumalow of all people. He ended up making the decision for me. He kicked my leg, forcing me to kneel, "Don't move," I could hear the commotion around us now and the sound of a helicopter flying in put a little hope in my heart, because whether it was HYDRA, SHIELD, or someone else, Rumalow wouldn't want to make waves, "Put the gun down. Not here. Not here!"

We were taken into custody, put in the back of a transport vehicle and I could see that Nat wasn't doing well. I'd seen her in worse shape, but I could see the concealed pain in her gaze, and the weakness that was in her body from the gunshot wound. My sadness was weighing down my heart, but I could see something else clouding her vision. I couldn't tell what exactly it was, but with Natasha, I really was never sure, and my best guess was often off the mark. I was good at reading people, but Nat took hiding to a whole other level. I spoke, breaking the quiet of the van, "It was him. He looked right at me like he didn't even know me."

"How's that even possible? It was like seventy years ago," Sam asked.

"Zola. Bucky's whole unit was captured in '43, Zola experimented on him. Whatever he did helped Bucky survive the fall. They must have found him and--"

"None of that's your fault, Steve," Nat interrupted, her voice betraying something, but I didn't know what.

"Even when I had nothing, I had Bucky."

Before I could fall back into my stupor of sadness, Sam said, "We need to get a doctor here. We don't put pressure on that wound she's gonna bleed out here in the truck." Suddenly, one of the guards pulled out an electric rod and they neutralized the other guard.

The guard took off the helmet and was revealed to be Maria Hill, and she said, "Ah. That thing was squeezing my brain," she looked at Sam, and then me, asking, "Who's this guy?" The vehicles suddenly stopped and Maria pulled out something that looked like the baton she had just used, but it appeared to be a metal-cutting torch, which she used to cut open the floor of the van and we all hopped out. Nat's shoulder was making it hard for her to move, but she was being a trooper through the entire thing.

We soon arrived at an underground facility. We were greeted by a doctor, who Sam told Nat's medical condition. Maria added, "She'll want to see him first." We followed Hill to another room, and when she opened the curtain, all three of us were shocked to see Nick Fury laying in the bed, alive and despite his injuries, looking not so bad. He quipped, "About damn time."

The doctor came in and began treating Natasha's wound, while Fury listed his injuries, "Lacerated spinal column, cracked sternum, shattered collarbone, perforated liver, one hell of a headache."

The doctor added, "Don't forget your collapsed lung."

"Oh, let's not forget that. Otherwise, I'm good," Fury drawled.

"They cut you open, your heart stopped," Nat whispered shock covering her voice.

"Tetrodotoxin B. Slows the pulse to one beat a minute. Banner developed it for stress. Didn't work so great for him, but we found a use for it," Fury explained.

"Why all the secrecy? Why not just tell us?" I asked, anger rising.

"Any attempt on the director's life had to look successful," Hill interjected.

"Can't kill you if you're already dead. Besides, I wasn't sure who to trust," was Fury's last word.


	2. Chapter 2

I turned and left the room at that, not being able to face Fury. The anger I felt boiling through my veins was almost too much for me and I didn't want to make anyone nervous or scared. I knew I had the ability to be scary when I wanted to be and generally, my anger made me a little irrational. I just walked, until I found a secluded corner to sit down in. I curled up and allowed my anger to run its course. It didn't take as long as I thought it would, but the anger slowly gave way to a sense of deep and cavernous sadness. It felt like my body had been hollowed out and filled with lead. I felt as though I weighed a thousand pounds and I didn't want to get up from my position on the floor. There were no tears because I knew that Bucky was alive and I would do anything to stop him from dying or being recaptured. Before I could get up, I heard footsteps. I could tell by the gait, it was Nat. She approached slowly, sitting down next to me, leaving space between us. I asked, "Shouldn't you be in a bed, resting?"

Her smile was small, but a smile nonetheless, and she answered, "I've had worse, Rogers. Besides, I needed to talk to you, and I figured you could use that friend you were looking for."

I grinned, remembering our conversation on the way to Camp Lehigh.

_"You know, it's kind of hard to trust someone when you don't know who that someone really is."_

_"Yeah. Who do you want me to be?"_

_"How about a friend?"_

_"Well, there's a chance you might be in the wrong business, Rogers."_

I added, "What did you need to talk to me about?"

She sighed and the look on her face settled into the blank mask she liked to use. She began to speak, "When I was a little kid, I was recruited by the Red Room. They turned me into the world's most deadly assassin all before I was 18 years old. After I turned 18, I was graduated. Before I went into the field, I was torn apart and put back together the wrong way. For years, I worked alone. For years, that was enough for me. I didn't know who I was and it didn't matter. But several years after I graduated, I was introduced to a partner--"

"Nat," I gasped, getting a bad feeling

"Let me finish, please," she whispered.

I nodded and she continued, "Who had long dark hair and a metal arm. His accent wasn't quite Russian enough to make me believe he was a product of the Red Room like me and there was something about him that drew me in. As we continued to work together, I realized that he was changing gradually. His accent was slipping more and more and he seemed to change from a mindless assassin, into a real person. But after our first couple of missions together, they took him away, and he came back to me the same soulless assassin I had first met. I started to notice a pattern after that. A few weeks would go by and they would take him away and he would come back mindless. I couldn't do anything about it, but I felt myself falling for him, even though the Red Room had taught me that relationships and attachments were a weakness. He was the only constant in my life at the time, and I desperately needed it. Eventually, they stopped taking him away from me and began to change even more. He knew who he was and asked me to call him James. We fell into a romance between missions. He was the first man I had ever truly loved. But, after a few years working together and falling in love, they took him away from me and never brought him back. That same day, they brought me into a room and strapped me into something that made me completely forget him. Only after Clint brought me in did I begin recovering memories of him. When I was shown your file before New York, I noticed my James following you around and I realized that he had been captured after he fell off the train. I'm so sorry I didn't tell you sooner, Steve."

I stared back at her, my heart aching for her just as much as it was for Bucky and myself. We had all been through so much and it made my whole body ache to think that she had been through something similar to what Bucky had. I continued to stare at her and she quipped, "You're supposed to be angry, Rogers."

"I can't be. I'm so sorry Nat. No one should have to deal with those kinds of memories, let alone have to deal with the person who was closest to the love of their life."

Nat stared at me as if I had grown a second head. She asked, "Why are you not angry, Rogers?"

"Because he was also the love of my life," I whispered, feeling like I was telling her that I had killed her mother.

She continued to stare at me and I could see the shock written all over her face. Slowly I could see her processing the information I had given her and even slower, her eyes shifted down to my lips and then back up to my eyes. Butterflies began flying around my stomach because I could see where Nat's brain was going and the idea got me in all the right ways. Working with Natasha over the last couple of years since New York had given me a unique insight into who she was and through no fault of my own, she had caught me in her web. She had me wrapped around her finger in certain situations, but I wouldn't have it any other way. Before another thought could enter my head, her lips were on mine, and we were sharing another kiss. This one was far better than the one on the mall escalator, because we were alone, and didn't have to worry about a tac team coming to get us. I wrapped my arms around her and she gripped my face with both hands. Moments later, she pulled away and said, "I guess I would be willing to share."

I chuckled and said, "Same. But we first need to find him."

She nodded and added, "We will."


	3. Chapter 3

After the dust settled on the Potomac, Nat was scheduled to testify before some committee in the government. I wasn't sure which one specifically, but I was recovering in the hospital while she went in. The TV was playing the hearing, and I couldn't help but smile.

"Do you solemnly swear to tell the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth?" the bailiff asked.

"I do."

The Committee General asked, "Why haven't we yet heard from Captain Rogers?"

"Because he is recovering in the hospital after nearly losing his life to his best friend. Plus, I don't know what there is left for him to say. I think the wreck in the middle of the Potomac made his point fairly eloquently," she replied, voice sharp. It took a little doing, but she convinced me it would be worth it to drop the Bucky bomb, not only to muddy the waters surrounding the hearing but hopefully to make it easier to find him. We had called Tony before the hearing, or Nat had, giving him the whole story. He deserved it, not only because he was considered a friend by us both, but it turned out that the Winter Soldier was responsible for the deaths of his parents. We felt he deserved to know that. We also asked if he would be willing to set up a tip line so people could call in and give information.

The Committee General stared back at Natasha and asked, "I'm sorry, best friend?"

Nat smiled her 'I've got you now' smile and replied, "Yes. The man who killed Nick Fury and the man who was on the same helicarrier as Steve Rogers was his best friend James Buchanan Barnes."

The room broke into whispers and shouts all at the same time and cameras flashed at the shocked looks on all of the committee members' faces. It went on for a long time before the general called order and asked, "What proof do you have of this, Agent Romanoff?"

"Do you not trust the memory of America's super-soldier?" she asked with a smirk.

The general stared back, and replied, "I trust Captain Rogers, however, he's not here. You are, and I'm not sure I trust you, and if he was here he could explain how this country is expected to maintain its national security now that he and you have laid waste to our intelligence apparatus."

"Well, Mr. General, I'm not sure what evidence you're looking for. He was trained by HYDRA and the Red Room. The same place I was trained. They know how to make a person invisible. He wouldn't have been noticed if he didn't want to be. Additionally, HYDRA was selling you lies, not intelligence."

The general paused, taking in the information Nat had given to him, no matter how little of it there was. He then added, "How would you know where The Winter Soldier was trained? Ms. Romanoff, you seemed to have had a personal hand in telling a lot of those lies."

Before Nat could respond, another man by the name Scudder interjected, "Agent, you should know that there are some on this committee who feel, given your service record, both for this country and against it, that you belong in a penitentiary, not mouthing off on Capitol Hill."

"You're not gonna put me in a prison. You're not gonna put any of us in a prison. You know why?"

Scudder replied, "Do enlighten us."

"Because you need us. Yes, the world is a vulnerable place, and yes, we helped make it that way. But we're also the ones best qualified to defend it. So if you want to arrest me, arrest me. You'll know where to find me; and if anyone finds or sees James Buchanan Barnes, call this number," she listed the number, "and tell the person on the other end what you saw. We are currently waiting for Captain Rogers to continue healing before we begin our search, but we would love to have all the information we can get. Thank you."


	4. Chapter 4

**Natasha POV**

After the hearing, I made my way back to the hospital and up to Steve's room. When I arrived, I was surprised to see Sam not there, and Steve's eyes open and looking up at the TV. Before I could do anything, his voice broke the silence with, "Well done, Nat."

I looked at him and he had a smile on his face. I grinned back and walked in, sitting next to his hand on the bed. "How are you feeling?"

"Eh, I've felt worse. Once I'm healed here, I was thinking we should move operations up to Tony's place. Might make it easier to keep up with the tip line and plus we would have a little more resources with him then here," he replied, eyes sparkling with hope.

Even if I tried my hardest, I wouldn't be able to resist smiling at the look on his face. I then asked, "Any plans for after we find him?"

"I've been thinking about that a little since I've been up. One thing that I wish SHIELD had done for me when I woke up from the ice was to give me a chance to go somewhere I could recover on my own. I woke up, ran into Times Square, and then was put in an apartment in the middle of the city. It was a lot to handle for me all at once and looking back, I wish someone had put me in a cabin in the middle of nowhere so I could go at my own pace and not feel bombarded by everything. I was thinking Buck might be similar, so maybe we could find a place that's big enough for all of us and go there."

I mulled over the idea in my head, allowing silence to fall. Honestly, the idea was a good one. It would give Steve and me a chance to take some time off after this whole debacle and it would give James a nice place to recover. Additionally, it would make sure that if anything were to happen to him, no one else would get caught in the crossfire. If we were to find the right place, I don't think Tony would have a problem installing JARVIS or a similar system in the house so that we wouldn't be completely off the grid. Plus, we could also build in features that would work for us like a long-range weapons area, a nice workout room, and a panic room. Even if we never needed it, somewhere we could go if something went wrong would be nice, and it could serve as a nice place to hold James if it was necessary. 

"I think its a great idea. Sam say anything?" I asked back.

Steve grinned, but before he could reply, the man himself entered the room and said, "Sam can speak for himself."

I grinned at him and gestured for him to continue. He said, "I don't know if I can go back to the VA. I think maybe I'll stay here for a little bit and see how it goes and if I end up hating it, I might head up to New York and try Avenging on for size."

I looked over to Steve, who had a grin on his face. He replied, "I think that's a great idea, Sam. When we get to New York, we'll let Tony know you might be coming."

Sam had a stupid grin on his face and said, "Thanks, Steve," he paused, sighed, and continued, "Well, I guess I should get going. I bet my mom is going to tan my hide over all of this and I figure after saving millions, I deserve a little vacation time."

Steve and I both chuckled and then Steve spoke up, sincerity lacing his tone, "Thank you, Sam. We really appreciate your help."

"Steve, I told you already. I couldn't say no, even if I wanted to. I was happy to be of service. Now you two look after each other and if you need any help looking for resources for James, you let me know. I might know a few people."

We both nodded, Sam, entering the room to grab his last few things, nodding at both of us and then leaving the room. Steve sighed and whispered, "He's a good egg."

"That he is," I replied.


	5. Chapter 5

A few days later, Steve was out of the hospital, but still not ready for travel. Plus, he needed to clear his apartment, or what was left of it and I needed to pack up my stuff for the move to New York. I was actually looking forward to getting back to Stark Tower. As much as Stark pushed my buttons, I vastly preferred New York to DC. DC wasn't bad, but it was certainly not New York. Steve had been staying at my place while he was continuing his recovery and it was nice to have someone else around. As long as I had known Steve, he had been a bit of an enigma to me. For a Black Widow, people weren't enigmas. Every person was a puzzle and I just had to find the right order for all of the pieces. But Steve, I just couldn't figure out. But living with him, I began to see him more and more. I had always been able to read Steve, but now I was seeing him. I felt as if he was finally giving me the pieces I needed to finish his puzzle. He liked order. He was fascinated by certain modern technologies. He was a wonderful and talented artist. He had a strong passion for naps and relaxation time. Over the time we were preparing to leave for New York, I began to see him more as just Steve, the man who I was slowly falling for, rather than Captain America, the man who was serving as America's poster boy. It was nice.

Slowly but surely another week passed and we were ready to go. All of our bags had been packed and we were finally leaving. But, before we left, the doctors at the hospital Steve had stayed in wanted to give him one final look over, even though he was Captain America and he was fine. We had agreed we wanted to drive up to New York rather than fly, not only because it was more conspicuous to fly, but because Steve and I both liked long drives. We had rented a nice, huge, SUV, so we could fit all of Steve's boxes that were living in his storage unit, along with my things that had accumulated in my apartment. When we arrived at the hospital, he ran in while I stayed with the car, just in case someone tried something. Half an hour later, he was back, with a clean bill of health and a megawatt smile on his face. He hopped in and we began the drive.

The drive was going to be a little over four hours, so we agreed that halfway through the drive, which happened to be right about in Philadelphia, we would take a break and go for a nice walk and see some of the sights and grab a bite to eat. I'd been to Philly before, but never as a tourist, and Steve had never been. As Captain America, I felt it was only right that he sees some of the places where the founding fathers did some of their best work. Steve made a face about it, but I could tell he was interested in seeing some of the places. Plus, I knew a few great restaurants in the area. It would be a nice break from the monotony of driving.

\--

About eight hours later, we arrived at Stark Tower. Our drive wasn't bad and we ended up wasting four hours in Philly because we were having so much fun. We saw a ton of places that were really important to American history, like the Liberty Bell, and then took two hours to eat. The food was delicious and Steve was fun to watch as he sampled a bunch of food from the menu, along with several different beers from the tap. He was lucky he didn't get drunk because if he had, he would have been blitzed. The rest of the drive to New York was fine, Steve and I both making conversation for some of it, but other times we would both lapse into silence and watch the road go by in front of us.

Pulling up to the Tower was a relief. Neither of us had been able to really relax in DC because after the whole debacle we were scared that something was going to happen. Something was just as likely to happen in New York, but it was farther away from the epicenter of the disaster, so we felt a little safer. Stark told us we could pull in around the back into the underground garage and he would meet us at the entrance. True to his word, we pulled up to the garage entrance and at the keypad, a voice we both recognized as JARVIS said, "Welcome to Stark Tower, how can I be of assistance?"

"Hey JARV, it's Steve and Natasha. We just want to park."

"Welcome, Master Rogers and Miss Romanoff. Sir is waiting for you at the entrance," he said back and the entrance opened up and we pulled in.

The car parked, we got out grabbed a few things, and made our way over to where Tony was waiting. Steve looked a little nervous and I knew it was because of Bucky being the one to kill Stark's parents. Tony could tell as well and before Steve could say a word, Tony said, "I don't want sorry's, Rogers. I want you to find him and bring him home. While you're doing that, I'm going to be doing everything in my power to find and destroy as many HYDRA bases as I can. They're the ones responsible for my parents, not Barnes."

"Wow, Stark. That was almost mature," I drawled, trying not to give away my surprise at how measured Tony was being.

Tony glared at me and said, "Pepper knocked some sense into me and I realized he was the biggest victim of them all. Now, come inside."

We followed, entering the elevator and heading up to the penthouse. Pepper was there waiting and we both exchanged greetings with her before she had to go and take care of some business. That left us with Tony and I could tell something was on his mind. We sat down on the couch, and Tony kept shifting around. Steve even noticed because he caught my eye and quirked an eyebrow as to ask, 'What's up with him?' I looked back at Tony and finally broke the silence with, "Tony, spit it out."

"What's the last either of you heard of Coulson?" Tony asked, in an uncharacteristically neutral tone.

I looked to Steve to see his eyebrows quirking the same as mine and he answered with, "Tony, you know what happened. He was KIA on the helicarrier in New York."

Tony looked to me and I nodded, agreeing with Steve. Tony put his head in his hands, letting out a sigh before he continued, "Well, that's not the whole truth. After Phil was DOA, he was whisked away and no one ever saw him again. So, imagine my shock when he waltzed right into the building a few days ago, looking for you two."

I stared back at Tony, jaw hanging open, eyes wide. It wasn't possible. It was not possible for Phil to still be alive. He was 100% dead when Loki stabbed him. I saw him. He was gone. I whispered, "How?"

"According to him, he doesn't know. But he had a long vacation in Tahiti."

"Tahiti?" I asked, the name tickling something in my head.

"Yeah. That mean something?" Tony asked.

"Ah, hell," I muttered, knowing this wasn't going to go over well.

"As far as I know, it was a project that Phil and Fury were developing in case of a lost Avenger. I don't know a lot of details, but what I do know is that it involved a lot of secrets and a lot of weird codenames," I explained.

Tony already had his phone out and I knew he must have been looking for information on the project from not only SHIELD's leaked files, but any files he had gotten over the time he'd been hacked into SHIELD. I looked over at Steve to find him ashen-faced. I'd only ever seen him so shocked one other time and that was about two weeks ago when we ran into Barnes. He looked back at me and said, "If Fury were here, he'd be unconscious right now."

I chuckled and replied, "If Fury were here, he'd have a knife somewhere in him."

Before Steve could reply, Tony interrupted with, "Woah. This is some heavy shit. Project T.A.H.I.T.I. I might need to call in Banner on this one. It seems that Phil was injected with some mystery drug--I can't tell if it's human in origin or alien--and then his memories were altered with a machine. He had visions of a vacation in Tahiti, and when he woke up from surgery, all he could remember was being stabbed in the chest on the helicarrier and then going on his vacation in Tahiti."

Steve and I both winced at the memory alteration bit of the story, but as Tony explained, we got angrier. I was certain Fury wasn't planning on telling us anything about the project or that Phil was even alive, which was its own punch in the face, but the fact that Phil had to endure so much pain was hard for both of us. I looked over and I knew that Steve was barely controlling his anger. I asked for both of us, "Who else knows about Phil?"

"I've let Barton and Banner know, Pepper was here when he arrived, so she knows. Other than that, no one. We were lucky it was a weekend and only JARVIS was monitoring the building."


	6. Chapter 6

**Steve POV**

I took a deep breath through my nostrils, trying to calm myself down. Coulson was alive. Fury had brought Coulson back to life and hadn't thought to tell anyone, let alone the Avengers. If he was standing in front of me, he might not have walked away. My fists were clenched in anger and I was trying to keep as calm as possible. I could hear only the blood rushing in my ears, but I felt a hand on mine and I looked down to see Nat's hand covering mine. I looked up at her face and I could see the rage in her eyes. I asked, "Is Phil alright for now?"

"JARVIS hasn't noticed anything off about him," Tony replied.

I nodded and continued, "Good. Nat and I are going to beat the hell out of some stuff and then sleep. We'll deal with Phil tomorrow."

I stood up and walked to the elevator, doors opening without me having to ask. Nat sat on the couch a little stunned, but quickly recovered and came with me to the gym. When we stopped and the doors opened, I went right to the large bags, which apparently had been reinforced and strung one up. Nat was going for the dummy on the other side of the room, so I knew we were both going to be fine. If she had come and asked to hold the bag I would have been a little concerned, but this was good. I was dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, so I decided it would be okay to take off the t-shirt and my shoes and socks. I did so and then began wailing on the bag, putting all my strength into my punches, surprised by the fact that the bag was holding up okay. I continued to channel my rage into the bag, allowing my mind to go blissfully blank for the first time in a while. My anger at Phil, Bucky, HYDRA, Insight, and Fury were all being channeled into the bag. Sweat was rolling off me, but I didn't care because my mind was finally quiet.

I didn't know how much time had passed, but when I finally came up for air, I looked around and Nat was gone. I asked, "JARVIS, where did Nat go?"

"Miss Romanoff is in your quarters preparing a meal for the both of you."

"Thanks, JARVIS. Take me up?" I asked.

"Of course, Master Rogers."

I stepped into the elevator after grabbing my belongings and I was soon moving up. Moments later, the doors opened and I was assaulted with the smell of something delicious. I followed my nose to the kitchen and I saw Nat in casual leggings and a tank top, hair curly rather than straight. I smiled and she turned to me and said, "About time you came back. Go take a shower and get dressed and dinner will be ready. We can watch a movie or something and then get a good night's rest so we can deal with the Phil stuff tomorrow."

I smiled and tried to come closer but she held up her hand and said, "You stink. You get nothing until you clean up."

I chuckled and nodded, knowing that she hated when I got sweaty. I did tend to sweat a lot more than the average person, but that came with the super-soldier territory. I trooped to the bathroom, JARVIS leading the way and I found a set of clothes on the vanity. I flipped on the water and got ready to shower. When I stepped under the spray, I groaned as the hot water began working its magic on my tense neck and shoulders. I cleaned up quickly because I knew my workout high was going to be gone sooner than I would have liked and I would crash and burn if I didn't get some calories in me. I flipped off the water, dried off, and dressed within five minutes and headed back out to see Nat serving me up a huge bowl of pasta. Just what I needed after a workout. Carb heavy and it would support my metabolism better than most other things. Additionally, the bolognese had the protein I needed and it would fill me up. I sat down at the bar and Nat shoved over the huge bowl. She came over and joined me with her own, placing a kiss on my cheek before she sat down.

We both tucked in, eating with relish. Nat was an excellent cook and anything she made I was willing to eat. Once our bowls were empty and stomach's full, we cleaned up the kitchen together, exchanging kisses as we passed each other. I couldn't get enough of it. Dishes done, food eaten, it was time for a movie. Nat chose the film, which happened to be _Inglorious Bastards_. She'd told me about the film and I was intrigued as to its plot. I grabbed a six-pack from the fridge, wanting to enjoy a few post-workout, post-dinner beers. Nat would probably have one, but I could be wrong.

I settled on the couch next to her and before I could get comfortable, she was right next to me, curled up against my side. I grinned and settled closer, leaving no space between us. I asked JARVIS to play the movie and before I knew it we were both engrossed in the plot. I could feel Nat nodding off as the movie progressed, but I could tell she was determined to not fall asleep. By the time the movie was over, Nat had given in and she was asleep. JARVIS handled the TV while I lifted Nat into my arms and carried her to the bedroom, JARVIS helping me navigate. I settled her on the bed, shifted the covers, and then climbed in next to her. I pulled her into my arms and fell into a dreamless sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

The following morning, I woke with a pit of dread already sitting in my stomach. It left me feeling off balance and unstable, which wasn't a good combination for me. I noticed that Nat wasn't in bed with me, but I knew she was probably getting back from her morning workout or she was already back and making breakfast. I wandered into the kitchen, following mostly my nose and the scent of coffee. I found Nat in the kitchen, standing over a pan of bacon and eggs. I smiled and said, "You know you don't have to do all of the cooking, right?"

She chuckled and replied, "I know. I just happen to enjoy it. If I ever don't, I'll let you know."

I agreed and sat down with my cup of coffee. She passed a plate and minutes later came back with her own and a mug of tea. She sat down next to me with a kiss on my cheek and I asked, "You got a plan for the day?"

"JARVIS told me that Phil is down in his quarters waiting for us, so I figured we could eat and then go and see him."

I nodded my agreement and turned to my breakfast, which suddenly didn't look so appetizing. I forced myself to eat it, even though I wasn't in the mood. Nat seemed to be doing the same thing if the look on her face was anything to go by. But, we both finished our meals and turned to each other. I stood up and put my dishes in the sink. Nat followed and then we were standing in front of the elevator doors, each of us clutching a mug, but neither of us saying anything to JARVIS. I whispered, "I'm with you the whole way, Nat. We need to tell him what happened. If you can't do it, then I will."

She looked up at me, tears seemed to be shining in her eyes and she nodded. The elevator doors opened on cue and we were headed down to see Phil. When we arrived, the doors didn't open, so Nat and I had a moment to gather our nerves and thoughts. Seconds later, the doors opened and we were looking at a room that looked remarkably similar to where we were staying. The only difference was the singular man sitting at the breakfast bar. Unusually, he was wearing jeans and a long-sleeved t-shirt, but he looked exactly the same as the last time I had seen him. He turned at the sound of the elevator and when he saw us, he smiled. Nat walked ahead of me and wrapped Phil in her arms. He seemed a little confused by that but accepted the hug. When she released him, I approached and shook his hand. He smiled and said, "You're both okay?"

We both looked at each other and I replied, "We've both been better, but all things considered, we're both okay."

He nodded and Nat took the reins, saying, "Phil, we need to talk to you about something. Can we sit?"

"Of course. What's wrong?" he asked.

Nat smiled sadly and asked, "What do you remember about the time leading up to the Battle of New York?"

Phil looked between us and answered, "I was injured on the helicarrier before the battle itself and then after I recovered Fury sent me on a lovely vacation to Tahiti. I've been back for a while, but I wanted to check in on both of you because I heard what happened in DC."

Nat frowned more, continuing, "Why didn't you get in touch sooner after you got back from your vacation?"

Her question seemed to bring something out in Phil and he looked thoughtful for a moment before replying, "I'm not quite sure, Nat."

Her frown deepened, but she spoke, "Phil, what do you know about Project T.A.H.I.T.I?"

He paled and replied, "It was scrapped for being too risky. I had to twist Fury's arm to make him leave it alone."

"Then I guess you didn't twist hard enough, because you weren't on vacation Phil. Loki killed you on the helicarrier. We all thought you were dead and Fury never told us that you were alive. This is the first time we've seen you in person since New York," Nat explained, voice calm. As she spoke, Phil was getting whiter and whiter because he seemed to realize what was going on. He stared back at Nat and me with wide eyes and I could practically see the thoughts racing through his head. Lines were connecting lightning-fast and I watched as it all came to a halt.

"So none of you knew that I was alive?" he asked, voice quiet.

"No. It's what forced us to come together. We needed someone to fight for and Fury figured you were as good as anyone," Nat said, looking worse and worse.

He stared between us and then bit out, "If Fury were here, he'd be getting a beating."

We both chuckled and I said, "Get in line. If you were looking for him, I might recommend Europe."

Phil stared at me for a long time before saying, "I thought Fury was dead?"

"Phil," I intoned, putting everything I wasn't saying into the word.

His eyes widened and he seemed to realize what was going on. "Right," he replied.

I smiled and continued, "We're so glad you're okay Phil. If you need anything, please let us know and we'll do what we can. Do you mind if we also ask you a favor?"

"Of course, anything."

"Keep eyes out for the Winter Soldier?" I asked, not knowing if Phil had seen the press conference.

He smiled and replied, "I'll keep eyes out for Bucky and see what else I can do to help on your search."

I grinned and nodded my thanks, feeling blessed that there were people in my life like Phil and Nat who were willing to help. He nodded back and we took that as our cue to leave and let Phil process everything we had just explained to him. 


	8. Chapter 8

After our meeting with Phil, we headed back up to our space to find Tony waiting. He greeted us both and I asked, “Do you need something, Tony?”

He looked between us both and said, “I’ve been keeping up with your tip line and wanted to let you know JARVIS has been screening calls. He’s assembled them into a map of sorts for you to use in your search.”

I smiled and said, “Thank you, Tony. We appreciate it. Come sit. We have a few questions for you.”

He looked between us both, hesitating, but soon he sat down on the couch in front of the TV and we sat down with him. I tried to form a sentence on where to start this conversation, but my mind was running blank. Words were failing me and when I looked to Nat, I could tell she could tell that I was floundering. She spoke, “Tony, we’ve been thinking about what we want to do after we find James. Steve mentioned that he wished he had somewhere to go when he first woke up where he could recover and recuperate on his own, away from everyone. We think the same might be helpful to James, so we were wondering, once we find a place that we like, would you mind either installing a JARVIS system in the house or building us a system similar so we won’t be completely off the grid?”

He stared back at us and then asked, “Steve, this is what you couldn’t ask me?”

“Shut up Tony,” I muttered.

He smiled warmly and replied, “Of course I’ll help you. If you like I could find you a realtor to help you find the right house. If that’s not your thing, I’d be happy to help in any way I can.”

I smiled and said, “Thank you, Tony, it means a lot. I think Nat and I are good on our own, but depending on what we decide, we might need a little help. We have big plans for the house, not only to help Nat and me out but to help Buck in his recovery. We want the place to work for all three of us.”

Tony nodded and said, “Whatever you need, let JARVIS know, and he’ll take care of it all.”

“How can we pay you back, Tony?” I asked.

“Free of charge, Steve. You deserve a nice home and I’m thrilled you’re giving me the chance to do something for you. Plus, I think you and the Widow here deserve a nice retirement with James.”

“Who said we were retiring?” asked Nat.

“You did,” Tony said, “You want a nice place to spend the rest of your days just the three of you.”

“Well, you’re not wrong. But neither of us is retiring. We’re just taking a long term break. We’ll both still have our phones and equipment, so if you need us, we’d be happy to come in and help. No matter the time or place, we’re here, Tony. You don’t have to handle all of this by yourself. Now that SHIELD’s gone, The Avengers are going to need a leader. I don’t think I want to be that leader forever, but I’m happy to pass that mantle on to someone else. Whether you or Phil, The Avengers need a leader. SHIELD was good for bringing us together, but I think we’re good enough to be on our own," I replied

Tony stared back at me in shock and asked, “You think I should lead the Avengers?”

“Tony, I believe you are a good man. Sure, you’re not perfect, but neither am I. When we had that fight on the helicarrier, I was being influenced by the scepter. We all were. Anything I said to you is bullshit. You might be all the things I said you were, but you are also brave, brilliant, and generous. A good man wouldn’t be offering me free home renovations at the scale you are. If you don’t want to, I’m happy to lead from afar. But for now, James and Nat are my priorities,” I explained, boring holes into Tony’s head, hoping something got through.

Tony was staring back at me with a gobsmacked look on his face and when I turned to look at Nat, she had a similar expression on her face. I asked, “You too?”

“I’m just surprised you would lay down the shield. I was convinced that you’d never let it go.”

I smiled and said, “I have a great reason. If I need to pick it up again, I will, but I fought the war I was created for and I think it’s time I start living a life outside of the Army and SHIELD. I’ll always be around to help people, but I guess I feel I can do it as Steve Rogers now, rather than as Captain America. Someone else can have that title.”

She grinned back at me and I could see her agreeing in her head. Tony then interjected, “So you don’t want to be Cap anymore?”

I chuckled and said, “Tony, I’m going to take the shield with me when we go, but I don’t think I’ll pull it out unless I absolutely need to. As I said, I want to be on the Avengers roster, but I don’t want that to define me. I can avenge and be Steve at the same time. The long and short of it is, if you need me or us, day or night, you call and we will come and help you. Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Tony replied with a sigh.


	9. Chapter 9

Tony left our space, seemingly in a daze of sorts. He seemed to be completely and utterly shocked, which didn't happen often to Tony. When he was finally gone, I asked JARVIS to pull up the map of tip calls so we could begin our search. Thus began the long and arduous process of finding a man who was trained not to be found. It took a long time. Far longer than I had anticipated and every day that we didn't find him was another day that I lost a little bit of hope. Nat seemed to be going the same way as me, but I could tell we were using each other to help. We leaned on each other in times of need, which helped us both keep our spirits up.

In between looking for Bucky, we were also looking for homes. That went a lot faster. We agreed we wanted to stay on the East Coast, just in case, but I think we both wanted to be out of New York. While we both loved it, it wasn't home for Nat and it was slowly dawning on me that it wasn't home for me anymore either. We agreed that if we weren't going to live in New York, we wanted to be close in case we had to come in for a mission or we wanted to go and visit. Because we had loved Pennsylvania so much on our drive in, we began our search there.

Due to my military back pay, inflation on that back pay, and mine and Nat's SHIELD paychecks, we were doing okay for ourselves and could afford a beautiful home on a beautiful property. The process of finding a home we liked in rural Pennsylvania was harder than either of us expected. All of the homes were beautiful, but a little ostentatious for Nat and I. We were both rather understated and we didn't feel the need to make a big statement about who we were with our house. The search was long and frustrating and just when we thought about giving up and asking for help, we came across a wonderful home. It was in Kennett Square, PA, and even if it needed a bit of TLC, Nat and I agreed it was perfect. It was situated on a ton of acreage, which meant we would have the privacy we needed, along with having plenty of space to expand if the need arose. The house itself was large, but it needed a lot of love. According to Nat, the kitchen was stuck in the '80s and each of the bedrooms was painted with different colored accents. We were grateful to Tony for his offer of help with construction and renovation.

With everything in the house, we were sold, but what made us convinced that this was the right property for us was the huge barn on the property. There was room for 16 horses, plus a tack room, washroom, and an apartment. Plus, if we wanted, we could expand our collection of animals. The property was so huge, we had more space than we knew what to do with, meaning that any idea we had, it would be feasible. Neither of us had any experience working with horses or animals of any kind, but that's what research was for. After we agreed on the house, we put in a very generous offer and we were blessed with confirmation the next day. We were almost officially homeowners. It took another month or so for everything to be officially official, but as soon as it was, Nat and I both took a weekend out there to see the house and come up with some things we knew needed to be done immediately.

When we returned to New York, a copy of the keys was made and given to Tony, so he could have access to the property to go and do whatever he needed. He had provided us with software so we could work on the design of the spaces ourselves, along with coming up with designs for spaces we wanted to add on to the property. In addition to all of the help he was giving us, Tony was also working on a replacement arm for Bucky. Nat and I both knew that thing was a marvel of engineering in its own right, but Tony could do better and we only wanted the best for Buck. We were all working away, making changes to the house, determining where the best place to start was for our farm, and continuing the search for Bucky. The fact that two of the three things were progressing rapidly helped keep our spirits up, but we were both constantly let down by the fact that we were having no luck with Bucky.


	10. Chapter 10

**Natasha POV**

Six months have passed since we began our search for James. Nothing had changed much, other than Steve and I buying a home, Tony working to renovate that home, and us researching the best place to start with a farm. Steve and I were both city people, through and through, and we got the feeling James would be okay, but he needed time, so Steve and I were going to have to learn at some point. As we worked through books, online information, and asking JARVIS questions, we were slowly learning all we needed to about running a farm and how it could work.

It only took Tony about three months to finish construction, so we were good to move in right as the cold was coming in. We decided we would wait until the following spring to begin work on major parts of the farm, but we were looking into options to buy a few horses and some other farming animals. In addition to the large horse barn that was already on the property, we had designed another huge barn for other animals, like cows, sheep, chickens, ducks, and goats. We weren't planning on starting with all of them, but we wanted to be prepared for any eventuality. We were also looking into different species and breeds of each animal, not only to make sure we were doing the right thing for our land but also to help the environment. We didn't want to make any bad choices that would have negative effects. We were also looking into adopting a few dogs so we would have a little company around the house.

Tony had also built in a new system in the house and all of the other buildings on the property called FRIDAY. He didn't explain why she was named the way she was, but she was effectively the same system as JARVIS, who could help us with things and make sure the house was safe. It was also nice that she called us by our names, rather than Master Rogers and Miss Romanoff. That was one thing that always drove Steve and me crazy. We moved in midway through October, using the time we had to continue our research, settle into the house, and make sure all was ready for when we found James.

About a month later, midway through November, FRIDAY flagged a call the tip line had gotten from the National Air and Space Museum. They had seen a man in a ball cap come to the museum and go straight to the Cap exhibition, which was still up. He ignored most of the exhibit, but when he came to the Bucky Barnes memorial, he stopped and stared. He stood there until just before closing when he slinked out. It gave Steve and I hope that he knew who we were and was trying to place memories. So, we made the journey back to DC for a week, so we could investigate. The city was still trying to recover from the tragedy six months earlier, but everything was moving forward in a way that made Steve and I feel hopeful. Both of us were carrying weapons that would put James to sleep, an invention that was sent to us from Coulson, who had been keeping in contact since we had spoken in Stark Tower. He told us, his science team, called FitzSimmons, had invented a pistol that would shoot someone with something that would knock them out. We had called ahead at the museum, letting them know that we would be coming and to expect to see someone pass out. We also asked that they close the Cap exhibit down for the day, knowing that James would find a way in no matter what.

On the day we were planning to get him, we arrived at the museum before open, the curators and security at the museum being so kind, and we set up in the room with the Barnes memorial. At open, we prepared ourselves for a long wait, but about twenty minutes later, someone walked into the room and stood in front of the memorial. I was positioned at a height so we had someone taking the high ground. Steve was on the floor, hiding away from where someone could see him. We both had a line of sight and comms between us were silent with only breath sounds. I whispered, "Steve you have to tell me if you need me to take a shot."

He breathed, "Don't. I will take the shot."

I gave him the affirmative and continued to wait. James continued to stand there and about an hour after he had arrived, Steve stepped out of his hiding spot, pistol raised, and took the shot. The noise was a lot quieter than either of us had expected, but I saw the pellet hit James and he spun around at the impact, but before he could do anything about it, he crashed to the ground. I hopped down from my high spot and helped Steve gather James. Before we had entered the exhibit, we had worked out an exit strategy with the security team, so we wouldn't create a stir. We followed our plan and exited the museum without a fuss. It took us longer than we would have liked to get to the car, but we made it and were able to tie James down in the back seat of the car. Neither of us wanted to do it, but we knew it was necessary.


	11. Chapter 11

We arrived back at the tower as quickly as possible and got James into our floor. He was settled on the couch in the living room and Steve and I were both watching him like hawks in order to be ready for his awakening. While we waited, doctors swarmed James to check on his condition. They didn't say anything, but their faces gave them away. It wasn't good. After about an hour of waiting, we both noticed his eyes moving under his eyelids, so we knew he was going to wake up soon. Steve was antsy as hell, but I knew this was a big deal for him.

Minutes later, James's eyes were open and he was blinking away the cloudiness from them. He seemed to realize that something was different because when he looked around his eyes widened to saucers. Steve decided to say something to try and calm him down, "Buck?"

James's eyes zeroed in on Steve and I could see the tears forming in his eyes, "Stevie?"

Steve's smile could have powered the tower. "Yeah, it's me, Buck. Welcome back. Someone else is here too." He pointed toward me and I kept my face neutral.

James turned to look at me and his jaw opened in shock. "Natalia?" he whispered.

I could feel tears filling my eyes as I whispered, "Yeah, James. It's Natalia."

He looked between both of us and then seemed to realize he wasn't strapped down. He sat up and asked, "Where am I?"

"Not important. If you're feeling up to it, we want to take you home," I explained, wanting to get him out of here and home.

He looked at me for a long time and then whispered, "Home?"

I was still crying a little and I answered, "Yes, my James. Home. Stevie and I found the perfect place. It's about an hour or so away."

He looked back at Steve, who nodded in agreement. James looked back at me and said, "Let's go home."

We just needed to get James dressed. Steve had already bought him a ton of clothes that were at the house, so he chose a soft pair of sweatpants and a long-sleeved hoodie. Enough to keep him warm, but not too much because we were going to be in the house and the car. He slid into his clothes as quickly as possible. We let JARVIS know we were leaving, thanking him for all of his help. He didn't reply, but we knew he'd heard us. 


	12. Chapter 12

Pulling up to the house was an exercise in not laughing. James's eyes were wide as saucers and his jaw was hanging open. Steve pulled into the garage, turned off the car, and turned around in his seat, saying, "This isn't even half of it, pal."

James stared back at Steve, and I just burst out laughing at the look on his face. Steve and I got out, smiles on our faces, and helped James out of the car and took him immediately to his bedroom. We had decorated it simply because we wanted him to begin sleeping with us as soon as possible. Not like sex, but just with us in bed. He looked around the room, a small smile developing on his face. We got him settled and I looked to Steve and nodded, letting him know it was time to introduce FRIDAY.

"Alright Buck, there's one more member of the house. Her name is FRIDAY. FRIDAY, you want to introduce yourself?" he asked.

"Hello, James. My name is FRIDAY," she replied and James tensed at the voice and looked wildly around the room.

"It's alright, James. I'm not a real person, just a program that helps Steve and Natasha run their home and keep them safe," she continued noticing his distress.

He seemed to calm at her words, stopping with the frantic looking around and then looking back at Steve and I. He was quiet. Steve was staring at me which let me know he wasn't sure what to do. I decided to speak, "We know this is overwhelming for you, Yasha. Steve and I are going to leave you and we'll come to check in later, okay?"

We both left the room, leaving James alone. We knew this was going to take time and we'd both been talking to Sam a lot on the phone, letting him help us with some of the basics. He'd also put us in touch with several psychiatrists and psychologists, in order to help us on our journey of helping James recover. It was important to us that we do things the right way because we didn't want to set him back. We settled back down in the kitchen and Steve began looking for dog rescues. While he was doing that, I was looking into horse rescues. I had been doing a lot of research about horses and how they could help people with as severe PTSD as James had. The research convinced me that a horse was the right decision. It was overwhelming trying to figure out which was the best option to start with, but I was immediately attracted to the Mustangs and the American Paint Horse. Both were big and strong, but also seemed to be intelligent and willing to work. It was a combination that made me think of James and Steve both. 


	13. Chapter 13

**Steve POV**

Nat and I were still in the kitchen after having left Bucky alone. My anxiety was through the roof, but FRIDAY was keeping me updated on Bucky's condition through my laptop. No changes had been made since we left, which was a good sign, but my heart was nervous. I was scared of the fact that he was so jumpy. Sam and I had been emailing back and forth, because I knew he was a good resource for all three of us, but especially for Bucky. As we'd been emailing, I asked if he would be willing to send me a list of names of psychiatrists and psychologists who he thought would be a good fit not only for Bucky but for me as well. I had lots of things I was still working through, not the least of which was the pit of guilt that had been rolling in my stomach since I saw Bucky on the highway in DC. It was time for me to begin improving my own mental health, so I could support both Nat and Bucky. Nat was engrossed in her research on the horses, so I began working on some dinner. It was getting late and none of us had eaten since lunch on the road.

As I cooked, Nat finished with her research, asking me if I had an opinion on a horse breed. I thought it over for a moment and answered, "No, not that I can think of. I trust your judgment."

I could feel her smile and she asked, "James doing okay?"

"As far as FRIDAY can tell, yeah. Do you want to go get him for dinner?"

"Sure," she answered, getting up and going to get Bucky.

Based on what the doctors had said, it was clear that Bucky was going to need to have some significant dental work done. It seemed that many of his teeth had not only rotted away, but many of them were broken and doing more harm than good. The idea of surgery made me nervous, but I knew it was the only chance he had. Tony had sent me several good dental surgeons and dentists he knew of in the area that could help and I was planning on going to see them all and see if they would be willing to help. Dinner tonight was going to be a hearty stew. Soft enough Bucky's broken mouth could handle it, but hearty enough to make sure we were all well fed and warmed from the chill.

As the stew warmed, I set the table for dinner. It was one thing that I really enjoyed about the house. We had a great space to eat and there was enough room we could eat together without anyone feeling crowded. We all were dealing with PTSD, so it was nice that there was an option to create space for all of us. Once the table was done, I went back into the kitchen to begin serving the stew. I heard the pitter-patter of two sets of feet coming into the kitchen. I grinned at Nat and asked Bucky, "Hungry?"

He didn't reply and the look in his eyes said enough for me to know that I needed to say something, "Hey, you are free to say whatever is on your mind here, okay?"

His stare was blank and unnerving. I looked up to Nat and she shrugged her shoulders. I nodded quietly, letting her know to take him into the dining room and getting him situated. I finished ladling up the stew and took the three bowls into the dining room where they were waiting for me. We all sat down and began to eat. Well, Nat and I did. Bucky looked at both of us and seemed confused as to what was going on. He leaned back in his chair and just watched. About halfway into the meal, Nat finally said, "Yasha, eat. You need to keep your strength up."

He stared at her and finally picked up his spoon in a fist and began to messily eat. Before I knew it, the stew was gone and I asked, "More?"

He looked back at me and seemed to be trying to decide. I could see the desire to say yes in his eyes, but I could tell he didn't want to vocalize it. 

I stood up and tried to take the bowl away so I could refill it, but Bucky's hands were firmly attached and not letting go. I smiled and left the room, returning with another full bowl. He chowed down on that one just as enthusiastically, getting stuff all over his face. I was concerned that this was how he was reacting to food. It was clear that HYDRA never cared about how well he ate or drank. I looked at Nat, trying to check in on her and I could see the horror and anger floating in her eyes, but I could also see the love shining through. She met my eyes and we both smiled. Everything was going to be okay.

Once dinner was done, Nat brought Bucky back to his room and I took the dishes into the kitchen. Nat was going to be on dish duty while I helped Bucky get cleaned up and ready for bed. I left them there and headed to Bucky's room. I entered to find Nat sitting with him whispering in Russian. I wasn't sure what they were saying and I honestly didn't need to know. What they said was their own business. Nat looked up and noticed I was there so she said one more thing, planted a kiss on Bucky's head, and left the room. I smiled at Bucky and asked, "Ready for a shower?"

His eyebrows crinkled and he looked highly unsure. I headed toward him and he tensed up. I soothed, "I'm not going to hurt you, Buck. It's just me. Stevie."

I led him into the bathroom and he seemed unsure. When I headed over to the shower area, he let out a quiet moan. I turned around to see a look of naked fear on his face and when I followed his eye line, I noticed it was going to the showerhead. Huh. Showers--not an option. So, I moved over to the bath. I muttered under my breath, "FRIDAY, faucet at half power, warm water, please."

Water came rushing out of the faucet and Bucky seemed to startle at the noise. But once the water had been flowing for a few minutes, I noticed that the fear seemed to shrink. Buck was hunched over and seemed to be resigned to what was happening to him. Oh. OH. That made me realize he might not understand that this was not a punishment. I sighed and got up, stripping off my own clothes and climbing into the bathtub. I looked at Buck and said, "See? Not a bad thing. Just need to get you cleaned up, okay?"

His resignation and underlying fear seemed to shift into almost curiosity. I got up, grabbed one of the towels, and dried myself off. I led Bucky closer to the tub, allowing him to reach out his hand and put it into the warm water. I could see him processing that not only was the water warm, but it wasn't spraying him. He looked back at me and I asked, "Ready?"

He nodded slowly and I approached to help him undress. I lifted the shirt over his head and threw it on the floor. He seemed to be confused by that action and I said, "It's okay. I'm just going to take that so I can wash it. You'll get it back. I promise." He stared back at me and seemed skeptical. I smiled and shook my head, knowing he wouldn't believe me until he got it back. I wrapped one arm around his back and helped him into the bath.

He was settled into the water so I passed him a cup so he could wet his head. He stared at it but then seemed to realize what it was for and tentatively poured a dribble over his head. He seemed to realize it wasn't going to hurt or be cold, so he filled it up again and poured it over his head. I grabbed the neutral smelling shampoo from the ledge of the tub and squirted some in my hand. I knew I was going to have to do this for him because I wasn't sure he knew how. I opened my hand and showed him, saying, "I need to use this to clean your hair. Is that okay?"

His hand came up and touched the glob of product that was resting in my hand. He rubbed his fingers together and seemed to understand because he nodded. I ran my fingers through his hair, lathering up as I went. I tried to reach all over his head and I could tell this was a new experience for him because when I first started, he was stiff as a board, but as I ran my fingers over his hair and scalp, he relaxed and began to almost purr. It wasn't, but there was a deep, satisfying rumble coming from him. He whispered, "Thanks, Stevie. I know you're sick."

My hands froze, realizing that he was remembering. I whispered back, "It's okay Buck. You've had a long day at the docks. It's the least I could do."

He smiled and closed his eyes, relishing in the feeling of my hands in his hair. I took them out and rinsed them in the tub, grabbing the cup to rinse his hair. I poured over his head, trying to not allow the shampoo to get into his eyes. Once he was rinsed from the shampoo it was soap time, so I grabbed the washcloth and dunked it in the water. I handed it to him, allowing him to understand the feeling. He handed it back and I squeezed a small amount of shower gel on it. He did the same as he did with the shampoo, so I lathered up the cloth and began wiping it over his body. He was pretty tense the whole time but slowly began to relax. Once he was clean, I helped him rinse off and then helped him out of the tub and onto the bathmat. I noticed him shiver a little and muttered, "FRI, warm fan on." The quiet heater came on and immediately he stopped shivering.

I dried him off quickly and dressed him in warm pajamas and comfortable socks. He seemed to be warm and content, so I helped him to his feet and led him over to the sink so I could comb his hair. I showed him what I was going to be doing on myself so he would understand. He nodded and so I passed the comb through his hair, running into a few knots here and there. With a little love, they loosened up and I was able to get through them. Once that was done, it was finally bedtime. I led him back into the bedroom and helped him onto the bed. He didn't seem to settle but stayed sitting up ramrod straight. I knew he would either stay that way or he'd lie down. I left the covers close in case he got cold and kissed him on the forehead, saying, "Goodnight Buck."


	14. Chapter 14

The following morning, I woke later than I had recently. The exhaustion from the stress of looking for Bucky had me more tired than usual. Once I had a cup of coffee in front of me, I asked FRIDAY, "Anything to report on from last night?"

"It appears that James did not sleep last night. He spent a portion of the night exploring the house, checking to make sure all was secure. He then went out and traversed the property for the rest of the night until dawn. Once the sun had mostly risen, he finally huddled into a corner of the room and has been dozing on and off since," she reported, my heart sinking as she spoke.

I acknowledged and began to think of ways to begin helping him. I realized that for most of the last 70 years he didn't have anything that was his. Sure, he'd had a few items, but none of them were truly his. They belonged to HYDRA in the long run. Maybe one of the first steps was helping him to realize that there were some objects that were his. I went to the gym and grabbed one of the reusable steel bottles that were there. I brought it back and went over to the computer room, which also held a small laser engraver. Tony had explained to me how it worked and I figured it might come in handy. I asked FRIDAY to create a label design for the water bottle and then engrave it on the bottle. She was amenable as always so I left the room to find Nat sipping a cup of tea at the counter in the kitchen.

She smiled and asked, "All good?"

"Not what I'd like, but that will take time. He explored the house last night, securing it, and then spent the night outside. He's been dozing in a corner of his room since he got back. I'm working on engraving him a water bottle that is his. I was thinking you could take him on a tour of the property today and I could begin trying to find a way to help him further, like limiting his clothes and trying to help him understand that he has ownership of the house."

She smiled and replied, "I'd be happy to, Steve. Maybe the walk this afternoon will help. It appears that he might sleep for a while.'

I smiled back but only nodded. I settled back down and just enjoyed the morning quiet. There was tension in the air, but due to the circumstances, it was easily dealt with. Before the quiet even settled down, there was a slightly muffled scream coming from Bucky's room. Nat and I both got up, but before we could move, FRIDAY interrupted, "James is in the middle of a severe nightmare or flashback if his symptoms align. He will wake up, but he needs to be left alone."

Nat and I both halted, knowing that he would come out when he was ready, but also knowing FRIDAY was right. Not only could it trigger him, but he needed to learn how to ride out the nightmares on his own. We both sat back down, the quiet now being replaced with constant screams, moans, and whimpers, all loud enough for me to hear and from the look on Nat's face, her too.

\--

The noise tapered off after about 45 minutes, allowing both Nat and me to relax. About 15 minutes later, we heard a door open. Footsteps followed and soon Bucky was standing in the kitchen, sweaty, pale, and having a haunted look in his eyes. I could see him trembling a little, but I knew I had to let him come to me. His face slowly settled into a blank mask, so I got up to retrieve the water bottle for him. When I came back, I explained, "This is yours, Buck. To do with as you please. Anything you want to put inside of it is fine. If there is anything you want, please tell me or Natalia so we can get it for you?"

He stared at the bottle with wide eyes and as he unscrewed the lid, he kept looking back at me. I could see in his eyes that he was waiting for something to happen, so I just remained where I was. Once the lid was fully off, he slowly moved toward the sink. He was still looking back at me, but I continued just to watch. He turned on the tap and filled the bottle. While I wouldn't have picked tap water, he was free to do as he pleased. Water off, he put the bottle to his lips and drank. It seemed that he was constantly expecting some kind of attack. He drank his fill and continued to stare at me. I smiled and said, "I told you, Buck, you can do whatever you want here."

He continued to stare, so I headed back to my stool and sat back down. He stood frozen and then seemed to relax minutely and move slowly back to his room. The door closed and I let out a breath I didn't know I'd been holding. Nat and I enjoyed the silence for a little bit. After the horror of Bucky's nightmares, I got the feeling we weren't going to be seeing much of him for the morning. With that in mind, I finished my coffee and headed to the gym. I needed to get a workout in any way and I might as well do it when I had time.

\--

A few hours after I started my workout, I was dead tired. Generally, I would limit my time in the gym, but these days I needed the time. I needed the space to fight out my issues. It wasn't the healthiest coping mechanism, but I knew it worked for me. At least for now. Once I finally came up for air, FRIDAY told me, "Natasha and James have just left."

"Bucky doing any better?" I asked, heading to shower.

"He seems to be a little calmer, but not by much. Natasha has a few ideas, but she wanted to see if they would actually work before she said anything. I'll let you know when they're almost back."

"Thanks, FRIDAY."


	15. Chapter 15

After my shower, I headed down to Bucky's room and entered. Not much had changed from when I left the night before, but I did notice that some of the furniture had shifted around so the desk was pushed up against the wall and one of the smaller bedside tables was in front of the desk. It seemed like he needed to create a cave for him to be able to feel safe. I didn't touch it, but I moved to the dresser and began opening the drawers and pulling out many of the options that I had purchased. I would put them in another closet, but he didn't need the overwhelm of decisions right now. Once that was done, I went down to the garage and grabbed one of the huge coolers Tony had insisted we own. I hadn't understood it, but I was grateful. I grabbed it and once it was plugged in, I asked FRIDAY to get it running and set up.

I headed to the kitchen to grab some of everything for him. I wanted him to not only be independent but feel as if he had ownership of his space and situation. I knew it would be an integral part of his recovery. Once the food was sorted in the cooler, I went to the office and grabbed two of my notebooks. I liked to keep them around, not only to sketch in but to write in as well. I grabbed a few pens as well. Everything went down to his room and it was placed in a spot where he would see it. I also wrote on both notebooks: Property of James Buchanan Barnes.

Once that was done, I asked FRIDAY to tell Nat that everything was done. I headed back up to the office to continue not only my therapy research but to look at JARVIS and the doctors' reports on Bucky's health. I knew it wasn't going to be good, so I girded myself for the reality and began looking. As the list went on, I got more and more horrified. Nearly every muscle in his body had been messed up somehow and improperly healed, both knees were only staying together because of the serum in his body, his spinal cord was in need of some repair, his shoulder was totally fucked, and he was scarred and bruised over many parts of his body despite his healing ability. I got the feeling it was focusing on bigger problems. Because of the status of Bucky's body, I switched from therapists to Medical Doctors, surgeons, and other experts. It was important that Bucky get the help he needed when he was ready for it.

Before I could fall too deeply into the rabbit hole, FRIDAY let me know Nat and Buck were back. I headed downstairs and sat down in the living room. I didn't want to make it seem like I was avoiding them. I heard the door open and they both came in, Nat with a smile on her face and Bucky with a less haunted look in his eyes. I smiled at both of them and asked, "Nice walk?"

Nat smiled back with a nod, whilst Bucky stared at me for a long time. I could see the gears turning in his head, so I just allowed him his time. He continued to stare, but finally asked, "Steve?"

"Yeah, Buck?"

He seemed to relax a moment but didn't say anything back. He turned toward Nat, muttered something to her, and then turned around to go back to his room. Nat turned to me and I watched as her mask fell. Her eyes were haunted and she seemed tense. I gestured to have her join me on the couch. She collapsed next to me and I could feel the tension in her body. I began rubbing my hand down her back, trying to help her calm down. She slowly began to come back to herself and she whispered, just loud enough for me to hear, "I miss him."

"I know. I miss him too. He'll come around."

She sighed and replied, "I know. I feel so unsure of how to help him."

A sad smile made its way to my face and I said, "I've felt like that since the moment I lost him. But we're working toward solutions. I have a shortlist of psychologists, psychiatrists, and therapists that Tony is looking into. I also took a look at JARVIS and the doctors' medical reports and have begun looking into doctors, surgeons, and others we can trust. Once he's stable with us, we will have options ready for him. All will turn out the way it's supposed to."

She nodded and said, "Thanks, Steve."

"No worries. How was the walk?" I asked.

"It was good. He seemed curious why we had so much land, but I explained we bought it and it was all ours. He also seems to be slowly remembering. I don't know if it's going in any particular order, but his memory is slowly returning. Not only of me and the things we did together but of you."

I smiled because I knew this was a wonderful development. I placed a kiss on Nat's head and asked, "You want to get the TV going and I'll see if Bucky wants to join us?"

She nodded and sat up while I got up to go get him. I approached his door and knocked. There wasn't a reply, so I knocked again. I kept my hand by my side and just waited. A few minutes went by, but the door finally opened. I smiled and asked, "Natalia and I are going to watch some TV. Do you want to come watch with us?"

He looked confused. I could tell he was trying to process what I was saying and what it meant. He turned around and grabbed the water bottle, clutching it in his hand. He turned back around to face me and then nodded. I turned around without a word and began heading back to the living room, where Nat was sitting and watching a house hunting show. I rolled my eyes because those were the one genre I hated. I would have rather watched the boring news than house shows. I settled down on the couch with her and without missing a beat, she changed it to some sports game. It wasn't baseball season yet, but something was on for us to watch. Nat had also picked up a book, so while I was keeping one eye on Bucky and one eye on the game, she was reading. As I settled, I watched as Bucky entered the room, surveyed, and then headed to the back corner of the room and stood. He didn't seem to want to relax or change where he was, so I figured if he was happy where he was, I'd let him be. He needed to come to us.


	16. Chapter 16

**Natasha POV**

As the weeks progressed, and the year wound down, James began improving. He still kept his distance and hadn't said a word, but he was slowly returning to himself and using his face to express what he was feeling. He seemed to have realized that he wasn't going to be hurt here, so he was allowed to do as he pleased. He had also yet to sleep through the night, but that was something that Steve nor I had a problem with. He could sleep all day if he wanted to. He generally went to sleep as the sun rose and would wake up mid-morning for a snack. He was still getting the hang of eating, but Steve and I both worked hard to keep his cooler stocked. It was helping him to feel more independent. Steve or I would take him out for a walk in the afternoon, and the other of us would continue researching. Steve had been deep into the research for medical and mental help for James, while I was looking for animals so we could begin our farm come springtime.

As Christmas was fast approaching, I began looking into Steve's Christmas present. I wasn't the biggest fan of Christmas and I generally believed that people had turned it into a capitalist hellscape; that aside, I did want to get Steve something nice. We'd both been under a lot of stress with James, so I felt he deserved a present. I knew immediately what I was going to get for him. As much as we'd been talking about getting dogs, no forward movement had happened. Steve had his heart set on a few pups, so I made a phone call before Christmas and asked if one of their puppies was available for purchase. They were amenable and told me that I could swing by and come get the pup whenever worked for me. I smiled at their kindness and knew Steve was going to freak out.

\--

Two days before Christmas, I drove out to pick up our first puppy. I was pretty excited to see the dog and surprise Steve with his gift. When I pulled up to the breeder, they were sitting outside on the porch, in the snow. I hopped out and rushed to the porch. They welcomed me with open arms and we both went inside to meet the pups. I saw the pile of puppies and my heart melted. I knew this was the right choice, not only for Steve but for James as well. I knew his recovery was going well, but sometimes I got worried. I looked at all the puppies and I saw one that caught my eye. He wasn't the biggest or the strongest of the pups, but he was certainly ready for anything and loved to play. He held his own as best his could when playing and he did all he could to make sure he got what he needed. He reminded me of Steve, actually. When I asked for that puppy, the owner laughed and said, "If you take him, you're going to need his brother as well."

I frowned, not wanting two dogs, but also wanting to know what the story was. I asked, "Why?"

"Where the little one goes, brother always follows. Plus, big brother protects little one, when he needs it."

I smiled and chuckled to myself. The woman asked, "What's funny?"

"Nothing. They remind me of my partners."

She stared for a moment and smiled. It seemed a little plastic, but I wasn't going to let that bother me. James, Steve, and I were partners, even if one of us didn't know it. I asked for the two puppies and made sure everything was ready. She passed them off to me in one crate, both of them nestled together. I thanked her for her help and headed back to the house. FRIDAY was connected to my phone so I asked, "FRIDAY, contact Tony for me and ask him to send us two big dog beds, two sets of food and water bowls, dry dog food, and enough toys to satisfy a pair of puppies. Let him know we need it ASAP."

"Of course, Natasha."

"And let Steve know I'm on my way home. Don't tell him what I'm doing."

"Sure."

The puppies weren't making a lot of noise on the ride home, but I could tell that they were curious about the situation. As I pulled up to the house, Steve was waiting in front of the garage. I smiled and pulled in, turning off the car. I hopped out as quickly as I could and he headed over to greet me. Before he could get to me, I said, "Stop right there. I have a special surprise for you. Close your eyes."

He stopped in his tracks and then smiled at me. He did as asked and I headed to the other side of the car and grabbed the crate. I put it down and pulled them out of it and walked over to Steve. I held them in my arms and said, "Open your eyes."

He did and when he saw the two tiny German Shepherd pups in my arms, his jaw fell open. I smiled and said, "Merry Christmas, Steve."

His grin was miles wide and he said, "Wow. I thought we were only getting one of them."

I laughed and said, "I know. But I wanted the little one and the woman told me if I wanted him I was going to need to take his brother also. Sounded like a pair I know, so I couldn't say no."

He laughed and took one of the pups into his arms. It happened to be the little one, and he began licking Steve's chin. My grin was growing wider and I suggested we go inside to get out of the cold. Once we were inside I asked, "Where's James?"

Steve's smile only grew when he said, "Sitting on the couch watching something."

"Really?" I asked. James had been spending more and more time with us in the living room, but he hadn't yet approached the couch. I wasn't sure what about it made him so nervous, but it was a big step. Steve nodded in answer to my question and said, "Yeah. He's been fooling with the remote since we got back from our walk. Want to introduce him to the pups?"

"Of course. Names?"

Steve smiled and said, "Maybe one called Commando and the other called Howlie?"

I laughed outright at Steve's name suggestions and replied, "I don't know, Steve. How about Alpha and Kilo?"

Steve's eyes brightened, realizing what I was going for. He chuckled and said, "It's perfect. The little one will be Kilo and big brother will be Alpha."

I nodded my agreement and we went to go introduce James to the dogs. This was going to be interesting no matter which way it went.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations for Russian are in parentheses.
> 
> I also love this chapter and hope you do too.

We entered the living room to see James still messing around with the remote. Steve spoke up with, "Bucky?"

He turned to face us and when he saw the pup in Steve's arms, his eyes softened slightly. Steve continued, "We want you to meet these pups. Natalia got them for me as a Christmas present."

He stood slowly from his spot on the couch and approached. He'd been getting better about approaching us, but he was still generally wary of us and kept his distance. At this point, it seemed his curiosity and almost wonder, was weighing out his fear of doing something wrong. He got almost to Steve and looked up at him. Steve smiled and held out the pup he was holding. It happened to be Kilo, so Steve introduced, "This is Kilo."

James looked at the dog and processed the name. He then held out his flesh arm to accept the dog. Steve placed Kilo in James's arm and James pulled the dog close. Steve stepped away and moved so I was in view. I smiled and said, "Yasha, there's another one."

He looked up and when he saw the pup in my arms, his jaw fell open just a little bit. I added, "This is Alpha. He's Kilo's big brother. He's the one who has Kilo's back when he needs it."

James stared at the slightly larger puppy in my arms and then whispered, "Pick on someone your own size." I wouldn't have heard him if not for my enhanced hearing and apparently Steve did too because I heard his breath hitch. I turned around and Steve was paler than normal. James had fallen quiet, but I could feel his gaze on Steve. Before I could do anything, Steve whispered, "I can do this all day."

I flipped to get James's reaction and his eyes were wide as saucers and he was gripping the puppy in his arm. He seemed to realize that he shouldn't grab on so hard, but he was certainly holding the dog tightly. James continued to stare at Steve and both of them were in shock. James broke the silence with, "Sometimes I think you like getting punched."

Steve choked out, "I had him on the ropes."

I could hear James chuckle to himself and ask, "How many times is this? Oh, you’re from Paramus now? You know it’s illegal to lie on the enlistment form. And seriously, Jersey?"

Steve choked out a wet laugh and asked back, "You get your orders?"

"The one-o-seventh. Sergeant James Barnes. Shipping out for England first thing tomorrow."

"I should be going," Steve replied, tears streaming down his cheeks.

"Come on, man. My last night! Gotta get you cleaned up," James responded, voice thick with emotion.

"Why? Where are we going?"

"The future," James replied, a smile breaking out on his face. He continued, "I remember. Oh my god. I remember. Steve."

I could tell Steve was in the midst of an overwhelm, so I passed off the puppy to James and immediately went to Steve. He was standing frozen, tears falling and I could see the emotion that was playing through him. I placed my hand on his shoulder and said, "Steve? Come on, Steve? You're at home with James and me."

He blinked, taking in a wet breath. He looked down at me and the smile on his face could have powered the city. He looked back at James and said, "Hey Buck."

I stepped away and took the pups back from James as not to interrupt their reunion. Steve approached James and asked, "Can I touch you?"

James smiled and said, "Since when have you needed to ask to touch me?"

Steve smiled and placed a hand on the flesh shoulder. James was yanked in for a hug and Steve was holding onto James tightly. Both of them had heads in the crook of the other's neck and I could hear the quiet crying from both of them. They held onto each other for a long time, before they separated and Steve just stared down at James. Steve was about half a head taller than James, so he could still look down at him. James looked up and slowly brought his hand up to Steve's cheek. I could hear Steve's breath hitch and I knew I was about to see something beautiful. I smiled to myself and James pulled Steve's face closer to his and he whispered, "I'd always hoped I could do this to you one day. My god, Stevie, I missed you so much."

Steve was crying again as James pulled him in for a tender kiss. It was as if everything was finally all right with the world. Everything seemed to relax and no one was feeling any stress. They parted, faces nearly touching. Both were still crying and I could feel the emotion in the room. My smile was growing because I knew this was a huge breakthrough for James. Not only would it give him something he needed with Steve, but it was an opportunity to open up the world to him. My thoughts were wandering with ideas of what we could now do, when my thoughts were broken with, "Natalia."

I sucked in a gasp, because the only time, since the Red Room, I was called Natalia was by James, when he first woke up in Stark Tower. He hadn't said a word to me since. I stared at him and I could feel the pressure increase behind my eyes. He whispered, "My паук." (Spider)

Tears were falling and slowly I noticed Steve approaching me. He took the pups from me without a word and I walked toward James and asked, "Yasha?"

James smiled and replied, "Привет, моя любовь." (Hello, my love.)

I grinned and ran to him, leaping into his arms. He caught me as if no time had passed and we kissed. It felt like I was finally whole again. Like I finally had the missing piece of my heart. Like the part of me that had been lost had finally returned. We parted and I looked into his eyes and whispered, "Я скучал по тебе, моя дорогая." (I missed you, my darling.)

He smiled and put me down, kissing me. He then asked, "So, you and Stevie?"

I smiled and said, "We both want you and you seem to want us. Win-win, right?"

He chuckled softly and answered, "Indeed it is."


	18. Chapter 18

As the rest of the afternoon progressed, things seemed to calm down. The pups got the chance to explore the house and James, Steve, and I got the chance to spend some time together. We were huddled on the couch together, watching something, but honestly, none of us were paying attention. James was talking about the things he remembered and Steve and I were both just drinking in the sound of his voice. He'd been quiet over the six or so weeks we'd had him, so we were both enjoying his voice. It was raspy with disuse, but it was still the voice we both recognized. It also seemed that he had more of his memories back from his time before the fall than after it, but he seemed to have a lot of memories of me intact. He didn't remember missions or other things, but he remembered weird details about the short time our lives crossed paths. The pups had joined us in front of the couch and we all just basked in the time we had as a group. It felt nice.

\--

After the sun went down and we all ate dinner, it was time for bed, and for the first time, I was unsure of how this was going to work. Steve and I had been sharing the bed in the master bedroom since we moved in and the bed was big enough for one more (thank you, Tony). We wanted James to join us, but we also didn't want to overwhelm him. So much had happened today and we realized he needed some space. As we trooped off to bed, I paid attention to whether James was following us. He wasn't and I tried not to feel disappointed. He needed time to not only sort through the memories that had come up today, but to keep sorting through all of the suggestions and brainwashing that HYDRA had used.

\--

I was a notoriously light sleeper. The only time I ever slept deeper than a doze was after a good workout or several rounds of athletic sex. The workouts had been happening, but the sex wasn't, so I was sleeping like normal. Every noise was on my radar and I heard the door open. It was quieter than most, but my ears were better. I shifted closer to Steve, leaving room behind me for James to slide in. His steps were light, but I could hear his breath. It was heavy as if he'd just run a marathon. He slunk around the room and finally climbed into bed. The mattress shifted under his weight, but Steve was dead to the world. He slept like a rock no matter what the situation and waking him up was like dealing with a recalcitrant child. James slid in and made sure he was close to me, but not crowding. I flipped over so I was facing him and whispered, "Спокойной ночи моя яша." (Goodnight, my Yasha.)

I could see the small smile that fell on his face and he replied, "Goodnight, my spider."

His eyes fluttered shut and I grinned like a loon.

\--

The following morning, I woke up first, James on one side and Steve on the other. I basked in the warmth of my partners and reflected on the magical life that had been given to me in the last few months. As thoughts raced through my head, I realized that I missed Clint a little. We hadn't spoken in a while. He'd come to the tower while Steve and I were there, but he'd been there to see Phil mostly and to check in on us after DC. We'd chatted a bit, but I missed him. I whispered, "FRIDAY, send a text to Clint asking him to come to visit me. Make sure it's secure."

"Of course, Natasha," she replied.

I grinned and looked forward to James meeting Clint. It was going to be interesting, but that's what made life fun. As I ran through plans in my head, I felt James stir. I turned to face him and watched as his eyes fluttered open. I smiled and he smiled back and said, "Доброе утро мой паук." (Good morning, my spider.)

"Good morning, my soldier."

His grin was small, still, but brighter. We snuggled together and he whispered, "Stevie still a martyr about getting up in the morning?"

I chuckled and nodded, not wanting to ruin the morning quiet. I felt a chuckle vibrate in his chest and he pulled me closer to him. I wanted to snuggle even closer to him, but I wanted to allow him his space. Before I could stop moving, he pulled me as close as I could be. My smile was growing and my heart was finally calm after far too long. He then whispered, "I have the perfect way to wake him up faster than ever."

He pulled away and I felt him get out of bed. He moved to the other side of the bed and stood next to Steve's head. He began to run his hand through Steve's hair and before I knew it, Steve was moaning and mumbled, "Ma, stop it."

James smiled and replied, "Stevie, time to wake up."

His eyes blinked open and then grew to saucer size and he said, "Bucky?"

"Hi, Stevie."

He smiled and replied, "Hi."

James came back to my side of the bed and climbed back in and we all snuggled closer together. I whispered, "Steve, I had FRIDAY get in touch with Clint. I want him to come and visit."

"Okay, but after we get more sorted with James."

"Who's Clint?" James asked.

"A friend of mine," I replied, "The one who brought me to SHIELD. He's an Avenger like Steve and I. Best marksman I've ever known."

James seemed to pause and then asked, "Better than me?"

I laughed and replied, "With a bow, most certainly. With a gun, I don't know."

"Hmph. We'll just have to test this theory then, won't we?"

I chuckled and replied, "Why don't we first work on getting you back to healthy."

"But I am healthy."

I paused as the feeling in the room shifted. I looked at Steve and he seemed to realize he was going to need to take the lead on this one. He sighed and said, "No, Buck, you're not. The serum is helping, but you are in desperate need of several surgeries, not the least of which is that atrocity of an arm. Have you noticed we've only been feeding you soft foods?"

There was a pause, as James considered Steve's words, and then, "Well, yes. But that's not a bad thing."

"No, it's not. But we want you to be able to eat anything you want and right now, you can't. You're going to need some serious dental work done in order to repair a lot of the damage. You know you need it."

Another pause and then a sigh, followed by, "I guess. But I'm healthy."

"Buck, both of your knees are being held together with the serum in your blood and a prayer. Your spinal cord and back are in need of repair. Your shoulder needs work. After that's all done, you're going to need physical therapy to help repair other damage. Your body may feel healthy to you, but to us and any doctor, it's not. I know HYDRA made you ignore your pain, but Nat and I both know that you're hurting. We can see it. We can almost feel it. We know that your body and mind both need some help. With help from friends, we've been looking into the best surgeons, doctors, and others to help you. When you're ready, they will be ready with resources and options for you."

There was a long pause and then James swiftly got out of bed and left the room. I sighed and muttered, "So much for a nice morning in."

Steve smiled sadly and said, "He'll come around. He just needs time."


	19. Chapter 19

**Steve POV**

It was frustrating to see how little care Bucky had for himself. Growing up he was always concerned with his looks and always made sure he looked as good as our income allowed. He had no shame in looking nice and he was always making sure he maintained himself. But, as with many things, HYDRA had effectively trained it out of him. As much as it made me sad, I knew it would just take time for him to come back. After he left the room, Nat and I snuggled for a little bit longer in bed, trying to enjoy the morning quiet and trying to ignore the fact that Bucky wasn't with us in bed anymore. It was a big step for him to come and sleep with us, not only because he hadn't done it before, but because we both knew he had nightmares.

After we were done snuggling we agreed it was time to make some phone calls. Nat was going to see what she could do about getting us a horse in the new year, whilst I made a call to Tony, seeing if he had any updates for us about medical personnel. I figured he might and I also figured he would want to come out for when the arm was installed. After coffee and showers, Nat headed up to the office and I made my phone calls from the back of the house. The phone rang and was picked up with a "Steve! What can I do for you?"

"Right now, nothing really. I was calling to see if you got my messages about medical people to help Bucky. He's remembered a good portion of stuff but seems wary of the medical treatment he needs. We want to be ready for when he's ready, so I wanted to check-in."

There was a pause on the other end of the line and then Tony answered, "Well, I've been doing some research on the people you sent me and all of them seem to check out. There are a few that I discarded because they hadn't worked with veterans before, so I knew that would be bad. I also consulted with Sam Wilson about if he knew any people around you who could help. He sent me some names and I think those might be better options for both you and Barnes. Medically speaking, I think I have the right candidates, but for your mental health, you need to pick."

"Excellent. Can you send me the information you have for all of the medical and mental health people you've researched? I'd like to review them with Nat and with Buck if I can get him to come around to treatment."

"He's resisting?" Tony asked.

"Not exactly. We tried to explain that he wasn't healthy, but he seemed to believe he was fine."

"Ah. That makes sense. HYDRA wouldn't have wanted him to express any pain, so he probably wouldn't even now," Tony mused.

"Yeah, that sounds about right."

Before Tony could say another word, FRIDAY interrupted with, "Steve, James is in need of some help. He is in excruciating amounts of pain."

"Tony, I have to go." I hung up and raced to Bucky's room. I didn't knock or even ask permission, I just entered the room to find him on the bed, curled up in the fetal position. He was taking short breaths, but they weren't nearly enough. I could feel the tension and pain in the room. I approached the bed and finally heard the painful and overwhelming sobs that were wracking his body. He was shuddering in place and didn't seem to know how to make his pain go away. Once I reached the bed, I placed a hand on the bed and whispered, "Buck?"

Immediately, something shifted. He calmed down just slightly and his eyes opened to slits. He was still in pain, but a little less. When he saw me, he whimpered and whispered, "Help me, Stevie. Please."

"I know it hurts, love. We're going to get you all the help you need."

I asked, "FRIDAY, get Nat and tell her to bring a sedative with her."

"No, Steve," he whispered.

"Buck you're going to be fine. In order to help you, I need to put you to sleep. Not only so I can help you, but so your body can rest. This is too much stress for you, but because of the serum, it's not letting you go under. You need the rest and I promise, when you wake up, everything will be okay."

He whimpered again, curling tighter into himself. His shuddering was getting stronger and the tears were still pouring from his eyes. Minutes later, Nat walked in and handed me the syringe. I plunged it into his neck without hesitation, as much as it broke my heart to do so. Moments later, he finally relaxed and seemed to calm down. His eyes were closed and his breathing finally evened out. I looked to Nat and her eyes were wide with horror and pain. I knew we both needed to get going, so I said, "Nat, get the dogs and our go bags and I'll get him in the car. FRIDAY, call Tony."

Minutes later, Tony's voice came through the speakers with, "Everything okay, Steve?"

"No. We're coming to you now. We need your medical facilities, and I need you to call the best surgeons and doctors you know from the list. He needs intervention now."

"Alright, Cap. We'll be ready for you when you get here. Any order you want this to be done in?"

"Arm before anything else. Once the arm is off, we'll wake him up and see where his pain is at. Depending on where he's at, well do what we need to. Also, please call Sam Wilson and tell him to come up as soon as he can? I think I might need his help."

"Sure. Nat coming with you?"

"Yeah, the three of us and the dogs are coming. I'm sorry to ruin your Christmas plans," I answered, apology in my tone.

"Not a problem, Steve. I didn't really have plans and despite the circumstances, Pepper will be thrilled to see you. Plus, it means I don't have to ship you a bunch of dog stuff."

I chuckled despite myself and replied, "We'll see you in a bit, Tony."


	20. Chapter 20

When we arrived at the Tower, both Tony and Bruce were waiting for us. I laid Bucky down on the stretcher they had brought and we all headed right up to the med facility. When we entered, Buck was swarmed by nurses and Tony took Nat and me over to where a few doctors were standing. He introduced us to all of them, starting with the neurosurgeon, Dr. Marlowe, and the orthopedic surgeon, Dr. Cooper. Both women were grim-faced and I immediately said, "Thank you so much for coming in on Christmas Eve. I know it's a lot to ask."

Dr. Marlowe was the first to reply with, "It's no burden. We are happy to help."

"We know he needs help. We're going to do our best to make it all right," Dr. Cooper followed with.

I smiled and thanked them again before both of them and Tony headed into the surgery suite. My heart was racing with anxiety and when the elevator doors opened, it was a relief to see Sam. He sent a sad smile my way and said, "Well, fancy seeing you here."

I chuckled and replied, "Sam, thank you for coming."

"I told you I'd be here if you needed me, and it's clear that you needed me. Let me help you and Nat get everyone settled and then we'll chat."

The three of us and the dogs headed up to Nat and my space and we settled back in and got the dogs set up. Once we were all settled on the couch with beers was when the reality started to settle in. My hands began to shake and tears began to fall from my eyes. As I tried to breathe, my chest felt like it was constricting. A hand on my shoulder helped anchor me, but in general, I felt lost. I let my tears fall, knowing if I didn't, it would only cause more problems.

It took about half an hour and my face felt like it was two sizes too big, but I was all cried out. Nat and Sam were still there and both looked concerned. I whispered, "I'm okay."

"No you're not, but neither am I," Nat replied, voice devoid of emotion.

I looked up to see her face streaked with tears. I pulled her close to me and we cuddled on the couch. I looked to Sam and he said, "I'm going to let you two have your space. Call me if you need me."

I nodded and he got up and left.

\--

"Master Rogers?" a voice was calling.

"Mmph."

"Master Rogers, Sir is requesting yours and Miss Romanoff's presence in the med wing," the voice said.

My eyes flew open and I realized JARVIS was calling. Nat was blinking awake and I said, "Tony wants to see us."

She nodded and we both got up to head down to the suite. When the elevator opened, Tony and doctors Marlowe and Cooper were standing there. They all looked dead tired, but also like they'd done a good day's work. We stopped in front of them and Tony asked, "Good news or bad?"

Nat and I looked at each other and we both replied, "Bad."

"Well, it seems that Mr. Barnes is going to need to have some extensive work done on his shoulder. Based on what we saw with the old arm, it was attached to a specially designed plate that helped to support the weight. Because of Tony's arm, the plate was removed and a bunch of nerve, muscle, and bone damage was revealed. With some work, the nerve function can be helped, but he's going to need extensive muscle repairs and possibly a few more surgeries until the arm is installed. In addition, I would recommend you find a massage therapist and a physical therapist to work with him on muscle and joint damage. He is going to need a lot of help," Dr. Marlowe explained.

I nodded, knowing this was going to take time. Nat took the lead and replied, "We'll see how he feels when he wakes up. What's the good news?"

Dr. Cooper brightened up and replied, "It seems, based on what I've seen that other than a few main areas that need work, Mr. Barnes's skeleton is in good shape. He will need some joint repairs, but otherwise, he doesn't need a lot of work done."

That put smiles on both of our faces. We knew Bucky was going to hate having to deal with surgery and such, but we knew it was part of his recovery. I looked to Tony and asked, "Any chance you can call a dental surgeon you know is trustworthy and get them in here soon so he can feel even better?"

"I'll get someone in as soon as Christmas is done. He'll be up soon, so go and see him."

We turned and headed over to the bed where Bucky was laying and he appeared to be fine, other than the missing arm. His shoulder was wrapped in clean white bandages and everything appeared to be fine. Nat and I took up positions on either side and whispered quietly to one another about possibilities. We were going to have to keep a few things in mind as we went, but right now, we were just focused on making sure that Bucky felt better.

After about an hour, I noticed a few minor changes. Twitches in the hand and rapid eye movement. He was coming back around. His eyes opened and he took stock of his surroundings. He saw me and his eyes widened. He asked, "What happened?"

"You were in pain. We brought you to Stark Tower to help you feel better. How do you feel?"

"I don't know," was his reply.

I sighed and hung my head, not knowing how to move forward. Nat seemed to see my distress and she asked, "How does your shoulder feel?"

I could see Bucky processing the question and he answered, "I don't know. Everything still hurts."

"Okay. We're going to do our best to make sure you feel better. Do you feel up to moving?" I asked.

He thought about it for a moment, "I guess."

I took his flesh arm and he slowly sat up. He seemed to flinch a lot, but I knew he might be dealing with some problems from laying down. He seemed to notice that there wasn't an arm attached to his left side and when he tried to scoot off the bed, he overbalanced and nearly fell off the bed. If not for my hand on his arm, he would have been face-first on the floor. I steadied him and helped him stand up. The three of us shuffled into the elevator and headed up. When we arrived, we settled Bucky on the couch and went to make some dinner. It was going to be a long and interesting time, but if anything, I was grateful that people were willing to drop everything for Bucky.


	21. Chapter 21

The following day was Christmas, which made for a nice excuse to just stay in and relax. Bucky was still recovering from his surgery and he was asking lots of questions about it. He seemed to still be in pain, but it was bearable enough for him that he could push through it. He asked question after question and Nat and I answered them to the best of our abilities. Neither one of us were doctors, but we tried to answer his questions and soothe his nerves.

As questions were answered, he finally seemed to relax just a little. He stared at us for a while and then muttered, "I'm sorry."

"Why?" I asked.

"I ruined everything."

"Oh, Buck. You didn't ruin anything. We both knew you were in pain but we wanted you to be able to decide what you did. We didn't want to force you into anything. The only reason I even intervened was that you were not in a state of mind to make a choice. If you want to let this surgery heal and then go back home, Nat nor I will be mad. If you want to get the surgeries you need to get the new arm and then go home, that's fine too. Whatever you want to do, we're okay with it. I know this is so stressful for you, but Nat and I are here to support and love you," I explained voice firm, but loving.

He looked back at me for a long while, before he deflated in front of me, collapsing into my shoulder. I caught him gently and just held him. I could feel the shaking through his whole body, but I knew I just needed to let it run its course. If I didn't, it might get worse. He needed to let out his emotions, no matter what they were. As he shook, I looked over at Nat who had a look on her face that promised retribution. We made eye contact and I gestured her over to me so I could hold them both. She collapsed almost as quickly as Bucky had, so I just allowed her to lean on me and get it out.

I held them for about an hour and then Bucky shifted. His face was red and blotchy, but I knew it was only for a good reason. He looked up at me and whispered, "I want to go home."

"Okay. Once Nat wakes up and you get the okay from your doctors, we'll go home. I'm going to ask Tony if he has some high strength pain meds for you, so if you need it, you can feel better."

He stared back at me and whispered, "How can you be doing this, Stevie?"

I smiled sadly and replied, "Because I've been in love with you for almost 100 years. Because you helped me when I had nothing and no one. Because I know that HYDRA turned you into someone who you weren't. Because I knew you were in there from the second I saw you in DC. I know who you are, James Buchanan Barnes. I know you better than anyone. No matter what you did or who you became, I know who you are; and no matter what the situation, I love you. I loved Bucky Barnes 75 years ago and I love this version of Bucky Barnes."

His eyes were wide as saucers and wet with unshed tears. He leaned into me more and I whispered, "End of the line, my love."

I heard a gasp and he sat up and stared. He'd been doing a lot of that since we'd gotten him and it was never not unnerving. Nat was dozing next to me and I notice she shifted and asked, voice a little sleepy, "Steve?"

"Yeah?"

"Everything okay?"

"Everything is fine. Let me know when you're ready and we'll go see the docs and if Bucky's good to go home, we'll go home," I explained.

She sat up slowly and when she saw Buck leaning on me, tears still leaking from his eyes, she stood up and said, "I'll go. You stay here."

"Don't forget to ask Tony for the name of his dental surgeon," I asked as she left the room. I looked down at the man in my arms and realized that I meant everything I had said to him. He was my one and only person and I would be with him until we were both long gone.


	22. Chapter 22

An hour later, Nat returned with a sheaf of papers and a small smile. I could tell she was ready to go, not only from the look on her face but the purpose in her step. I grinned back and whispered, "Hey Buck, guess what?"

He made a small noise and I chuckled and replied, "We're going home."

I could feel more than I saw the smile on his face. We gathered our things and the dogs and headed down to see Tony before we left. We exchanged some words and Tony let us know he had filled up the car with dog stuff. We thanked him and headed down to the car. I settled Bucky in the backseat, making sure he was comfortable. I figured he would fall asleep on the ride home, so Nat and I could have a quiet discussion.

\--

Once we were on the road, Bucky was knocked out from the emotions of the morning. It was interesting to be driving on Christmas Day because there was virtually no one on the road. That made the drive not only less stressful but faster. As we drove Nat asked, "Do you think it might be beneficial to set up a full med suite, physical therapy suite, and massage therapy suite at the house? I don't want to have to keep going to the tower to take care of him."

I paused and replied, "I was thinking the same thing. Getting all of that set up now will make it so we don't have to go anywhere, but it also gives us a chance to help him get used to some of the equipment. I get the feeling one reason he's so resistant is that I'm sure HYDRA never treated him well when they were working on him. If we show that a medical facility can be good, he might be more willing to have the work done. Do you know of any good massage and physical therapists?"

Nat nodded and continued, "I agree. When we get home and get James settled, I'll begin working on a design for the building. Should it be its own building or an add on to the gym? And I was trained in massage therapy as part of a cover, and I'm sure we could find a physical therapist in the area who would be willing to train you or me."

"I think an add on might be nice, but whatever you think is best. Plus, we have the room. Natasha Romanoff, you never cease to surprise me."

She nodded and pulled out her phone and began making notes, with a grin. I smiled because I knew both of us were going to work as hard as we needed to, to make sure everything was as it should be for Bucky. I was also going to make some phone calls to the mental health professionals I had on my list, not only for Buck but for me. I knew I needed the help, but I was terrified of them saying something to the wrong person. Pepper had written up an airtight NDA, but I still couldn't be sure that whoever we chose wouldn't say anything. It kept me awake at night, to the point that I needed to talk to someone about needing to talk to someone. Sam was a great option, but he was too close to it all. I needed him as a friend, not a counselor.

\--

When we arrived home, Bucky was still snoozing in the back. I gently woke him up and he seemed to realize we were home and he relaxed. Finally, I felt like he was getting used to the idea of a home. It made me feel warm and fuzzy inside. When we got him inside, I asked, "Our bed, or your's?"

"Take me to yours. I liked that bed," he replied, voice quiet and contemplative.

I helped him shuffle upstairs and into bed, watching as he calmed down even more. I said, "I'm going downstairs to make some phone calls. You need me or Nat, you yell. If we don't reply, tell FRIDAY and she'll get our attention. Yeah?"

He nodded. I headed out, knowing that my phone calls were going to be taxing on me. I sat down at my desk and looked through the list. Many of the names seemed like good options, but I kept coming back to Dr. Miller. It seemed like she was a competent, intelligent, and kind person, who would be able to help not just me, but Bucky as well. I dialed her number first, and after the first ring, it was picked up with, "Dr. Miller's office, how can I help you?"

"Oh, uh, hi. I was calling to speak with Dr. Miller. I'm looking for a therapist for myself and a friend of mine and I wanted to see if she might be a good fit."

"Of course! Dr. Miller is free right now, so is now a good time?" the voice asked.

"Sure. Now's a great time."

"Alright, give me one second," they said before the other end went silent.

Moments later another voice answered with, "This is Dr. Miller."

"Hello, Dr. Miller. I'm sorry to bother you on Christmas."

"Please," she replied, "If it bothered me, I wouldn't answer the phone."

"Oh, well, that makes sense. Are you busy right now?" I asked, not wanting to be rude.

"Sir, it's Christmas Day. I wouldn't be busy even if I wanted to be."

I chuckled and replied, "Right."

"May I ask who I'm speaking with?"

I paused and answered, "That's part of the problem. I'm looking for a therapist for myself and a friend and we're both a little more high profile. Or I am and thankfully, because I have friends in high places, my friend hasn't gotten as much press."

She paused. I could feel the thoughts running through her head. The silence made me uncomfortable but I knew I just had to push through it. Before long she said, "Let me assure you, I am religious about doctor-patient confidentiality. No matter who you and your friend are, I wouldn't breathe a word to anyone."

"Not even under the threat of your life?" I asked, wanting to make sure she understood the stakes.

"Sir, I served a few tours. I know how to keep my mouth shut," she replied, voice sharp and serious.

I smiled to myself and finally said, "Well, I'm reasonably convinced you won't say anything. It's nice to meet you, Dr. Miller. My name is Steve Rogers."

There was silence on the other end of the line, again. I figured this would happen. This time the silence went longer, but I figured she was trying to process the idea that she was speaking with me. I never understood why people had such a reaction to me, but I was willing to deal with it. As the silence wore on, I got more and more nervous. Maybe she wasn't willing to help me? Maybe she wasn't willing to work with someone as high profile as me? As my thoughts ran circles through my head, I began to worry more and more. My thoughts ran faster and faster, but before I could devolve into a panic attack, her voice came back with, "Well, Steve. That's quite a shock. I certainly wasn't expecting a call from a superhero today. However, I'm happy to help you in any way I can. Do you mind my asking who this friend is that you're trying to help?"

"I'm glad to hear that, Dr. Miller. I don't mind you asking about my friend. However, I need you to promise you won't breathe a word of this to anyone. If you agree to treat myself and my friend, I'm going to need you to sign several NDA's. The world already knows who my friend is, but I'd like to keep it quiet where we're located and what we're doing. Are you okay with that?" I asked, trying to make it clear how serious this was.

"I'm happy to do that, Steve. Whatever you need for you and your friend to feel safe, I can do," she replied, tone amiable.

"Excellent. What I'm about to say only myself and about seven other people know about. In addition to myself, I'm asking you to treat Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes."

Silence, again. This time for far longer than any other time. I waited patiently because I knew this was going to take some time for her to wrap her head around. I was still trying to wrap my head around it and I'd known for almost a year. After around a half an hour, she came back and said, "I'm sorry Steve, I just needed some time to process that."

"Of course. I'm still processing it myself."

She chuckled on the other end and asked, "Is there anything you can tell me about James's condition?"

"Here's the deal. I don't want to tell you anything, because I want him to tell you himself so he can get himself sorted. However, for me to get myself sorted, you're going to learn parts of his story. Right now, he is still trying to come to terms with the physical damage that happened. I and my partner have been leaving it up to him whether he wants treatment or not. I did intervene because he was in intense pain and couldn't make a decision for himself, but until he says something about wanting to get help with his mental health, I'm not going to force him. Until he's ready, you'll just be working with me."

Again, there was a pause, but this one only a few seconds. She replied, "Well, Steve, I think that's a brilliant idea."

I smiled and replied, "Thank you. I thought so too."

Her chuckle was a relief to hear and I asked, "You're based in DC, right?"

"I am."

"So myself and my partners are now located in PA. Are you willing to do either video or phone call sessions?" I asked.

"Of course. I'm happy to accommodate anyone and anything."

"Wonderful. Well, Dr. Miller, it's been lovely talking with you. Do you want to schedule our first session?" I asked.

"Sure. Why don't we wait until the new year, just so we can start fresh."

"That sounds brilliant. I look forward to speaking with you soon," I replied.

"Same goes for me, Steve. Hope you have a nice rest of your Christmas"

"You as well. Bye."

"Bye," she replied and hung up the phone. I smiled to myself because no matter how bad things seemed to be, life was moving on an upswing for all of us. 


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Russian translations are in parentheses.

**Natasha POV**

As the new year came rolling in, everything was quiet around the house. James had fully recovered from his surgery and was now getting used to functioning with only one arm. He was getting the hang of it pretty easily, but certain things were still harder for him. In addition, he was generally more relaxed, probably because he wasn't in constant pain anymore. The difference was something to see and Steve and I both knew that this was a positive and healthy development.

Steve had also been getting better. As January rolled through he had his first appointment with Dr. Miller. Although he came out of his office looking like he'd been hit by a train, I could see the lightness that was spreading through him. He no longer looked like he was going to collapse under the pressure. Plus, I was proud of him for taking that step. It was an insanely brave and powerful thing for him to do, not only to help himself but to make him a better person for James. I thought Steve was among the best people I'd ever known, but I could also tell he was doing this for me too. I didn't think it was necessary, but I didn't have the heart to tell him that he didn't need to do it.

The pups were growing bigger each day and it was so much fun to watch them grow. Every morning, Steve would take them out for a run with him and they would all come back looking exhausted but content. While Steve showered, the dogs would join James and me on the bed, snuggling close and keeping us company. While Steve had been working to help James recover, I'd been working on the medical, dental, physical therapy, and massage suites on the property. We had agreed it should be attached to the gym and thanks to Tony, it was done far sooner than any of us would have expected. It was a wonderful chance we had to introduce the space to James and show him that it didn't need to be a bad thing to get treatment.

\--

As the second week of January ended, I noticed something was off with James. I couldn't put a finger on what was bothering me, but I could tell something was different. We were laying in bed with the dogs when I asked, "яша что не так?" (Yasha, what's wrong?)

He stared back at me, eyes shuttered off, but still expressing something. He sighed and replied, "болит." (Hurts.)

"Я знаю, моя Яша. У нас есть место для вас, если вы хотите лечение." (I know, my Yasha. We have a place ready for you if you want treatment.) His eyes seemed to widen a fraction and I could see the flame of hope flaring to life in his eyes. I grinned and said, "Once we eat, we'll take you to see it. Tony and all of the doctors are ready and willing to drop everything and head over here to get you settled."

"Why?" he asked.

"Why what?"

"Why are they helping me? I'm a killer," his voice was broken.

My face fell and I looked at him seriously. "Yasha, none of that was you. None of it. Since we told Tony about you, he's been single-handedly making HYDRA's life miserable. All of these doctors know who you were through Stevie and they want to help you. The President has recognized you as the longest-serving prisoner of war in history. You were a victim as much as the people HYDRA set you on. I know it's not that simple right now, but I promise when you're ready to start sorting out that head, we have that ready as well."

"Natalia?"

"Yes, my Yasha?"

"Thank you," he whispered.

"Всегда моя любовь," I replied. (Always, my love.)


	24. Chapter 24

After Steve was out of the shower and we were all fed and ready, we took James to our medical building. Steve and I had both decided that we wanted to make it look as different as possible from any normal medical rooms. We achieved that by having the place look like a greenhouse. Three of the four walls were all windows, providing the space with natural light throughout the day. Because of that, the space had an open and airy feeling to it, along with being relatively warm more often than not. All of the equipment had been modified in one way or another by Tony, making sure that none of it felt like it was used for torture. Whether making it run silently or having a custom outside so it wouldn't look like what it was, everything was made so that James could be calm. The room was divided into four quadrants with clear acrylic walls. One room was a massage room, equipped with state of the art massage therapy equipment. The next room was a physical therapy room. It was pretty bare-bones now, but after Steve and I learned more about PT, we'd fill it out. The third room was the dental suite, again, hooked up with state of the art dental and dental surgery equipment. The final room was the surgery suite. It was the most decked out of all of the rooms, and at the center of the room was a huge bed, which had the dual purpose of a surgery table and a possible sickbed. It could be hardened to serve as the surgery table and softened so when whoever was recovering, they'd be comfortable. It looked like a normal bed and as far as James was concerned, it was. We weren't planning on telling him about it until he was more fully recovered.

When we walked in, James's eyes widened and he gasped. Steve and I both smiled and tried not to laugh at the bewilderment on his face. He looked around and then asked, "This is a medical room?"

"Yep. Designed by Natalia here, and put into action by Tony and his team," Steve explained.

"Wow," he replied.

I grinned at the awe in his tone and added, "Whenever you're ready, we can begin working on getting you acclimated to the space and equipment. Once you're used to it, we can get you repaired and back to fighting shape."

He continued to look around and Steve and I hung back, just allowing him to take in the space. He was slowly realizing that we weren't HYDRA and we weren't going to treat him badly. It had taken a while, but he was making progress. As he wandered around the room, my phone vibrated with a call. I checked to see who it was and recognized it as the number of someone I had reached out to about a horse. I picked up with, "Hello?"

"Is this Natalie Rushman?" the voice on the other end asked. I had pulled that alias because even though they'd all been released after SHIELD fell, I knew that one was the least conspicuous.

"It is. Can I help you?" I asked.

"Oh, um, yeah. I got your request about a horse and I think I might have the perfect one."

"You do?" I asked, allowing a little of the surprise to come through in my voice.

There was a chuckle and then, "Yes. We just got him from a rescue right before Christmas. I didn't want to call until we had an option and when he came in, based on what you explained to me, he might be a perfect fit."

"Oh, wow. That's amazing. Thank you for calling. Is there a time when we can come and see him?" I asked, trying not to get my hopes up.

"We?" the voice asked.

"Oh, yes. Me and my boyfriend, along with my boyfriend's brother. We live together on a farm and I think a horse might help all of us. We've all served and I've heard horses make good therapy animals."

"That they do. Maybe you can come sometime in the middle of the week? I'm here all the time, so just call me when you're ready to come on over," he replied.

"Well, I don't know if we're going to be able to come in tomorrow, but how about we try for Tuesday. I'll give you a call if something changes, but we'll be there Tuesday morning."

"I look forward to it, Ms. Rushman."

I grinned and hung up, watching as Steve and James continued to explore the med space. Steve looked over and asked, "Everything okay?"

I nodded and replied, "Someone found a horse for us. We'll go meet him day after tomorrow?"

Steve smiled and nodded. We both knew that while we weren't country people by a long shot, we were going to try our best.


	25. Chapter 25

I don't think excitement covered it. I was shifting in my seat constantly and I could tell Steve was giving me a look, but I couldn't help it. I'd always had a secret love of horses. They were so free and wild but also were stunning workers. They were a bit of an enigma to me and I was thrilled with the chance to have an opportunity to not only own one but get to know one of these majestic animals. As we drove to the rescue, James was in the back seat, thinking quietly. Since we'd shown him the med room, he'd been quietly thinking. I'd seen James be a lot of things, but so far, never contemplative. It made an interesting change.

As we pulled up to the large breeder's farm, the grin on my face was reaching the point of creepy. I tried my best to reign—ha—it in, but I could tell from the expression on Steve's face that I wasn't being successful at it. As we all trooped up to the first building someone walked out and greeted us. The voice attached to the person was the one I'd spoken with a few days earlier and it was a relief to know that someone cared enough about these animals to work with them and rescue them. We took a tour of the property, the man explaining what they did and how they made it all work. Steve's eyes were wide at every sight and James seemed to be just taking it all in. As we approached the horse barn, the owner said, "So, we got this horse right before Christmas. Poor thing had been held in captivity for a long time before we got him. His previous owner wanted a horse but didn't want to pay the price for one, so just took him from his wild Mustang herd as a colt. Tried to take the Mustang out of him, but never succeeded. He's small for his age, but I think he just needs some consistent food and love. Super skittish and generally untrusting of people. Also a biter. Might be the Mustang, but might not be. We haven't been able to find anyone willing to work with him, so he's been stuck in the trailer since he got here. He's been in the barn, but we haven't been able to wrangle him out of the trailer."

All of us had horrified looks on our faces and we all knew this horse was going to be special. We followed him into the barn and approached the trailer. James walked in a circle around the thing, appraising its strengths and weaknesses. Steve and I hung back, knowing that if James and this horse got along, everything would be fine. The owner stood by the back of the trailer and just waited. He'd explained that the horse was tied up in there, but he was strong. James looked to the owner and said, "Let me in?"

"You sure?" he asked, skepticism lacing his tone.

James just settled himself and nodded. One of the doors of the trailer was opened and James slid in. The door was latched just behind him and we heard the shuffle of both creatures inside the trailer. James was whispering, almost inaudibly, but Steve and I could both hear him. He wasn't saying anything of import, but just soothing the horse and letting him get used to James's presence. While I knew it intellectually, this was proof that James was a patient man. He stayed in that trailer for over an hour, not moving, and just talking to the horse. Steve and I settled into our spots and just waited. We knew this was going to take time. After an hour and a half, or thereabouts, we heard movement in the trailer and James's soft voice saying, "Alright, I'm going to try and pet you now."

The trailer shuffled as they both moved, but soon, everything settled and James said, "Isn't this nice? Feels good, huh?"

Steve and I both could feel the smile radiating from James, even though we couldn't see him. We just listened as James continued to talk to the horse, his soft tones calming all of us. Before long, we heard James ask, voice not even raised, "Open the doors?"

Clearly, the owner didn't hear, so I nudged him and whispered, "Open. Slowly and quietly."

His eyes widened, and he ran over and slowly eased the doors open. We couldn't see James around the bulk of the horse, but we knew he was there. Slowly, achingly, the spooked Mustang inched its way out of the trailer, walking backward. We cleared out so no one was in the way. It took about fifteen minutes for the horse to be fully out of the trailer, but once he was, my was he a sight to see. He stood at a little over five feet high and while that was small in human terms, this horse made up for its stature with pure muscle. Even I noticed that the horse was powerful through its entire body. While he looked thin and undernourished, I could see the hidden power. Just like with James.

After backing him out of the trailer, James turned him around, again moving slowly and allowing the horse to choose its pace. Finally, once he was facing us, I could see the grin on James's face and knew this was going to be a success. Steve was standing behind me and we were both holding back a few tears. James looked at us both and said, "Come over, but slowly."

I moved first, taking my time to get over to where James was standing. He took my hand and placed it on the horse's neck, running my hand over the deep camel brown coat of this beautiful creature. As I stroked James continued to talk. I joined in, speaking about random things in Russian. I noticed that the horse was holding eye contact with James, but was also flicking its eyes to me periodically. I grinned at the wary disposition and knew that this was our horse, no matter what. After I got my fill of petting, I stepped away so Steve could step up. I noticed that he seemed a little out of his element, but he was giving it his best. He approached slowly and stood next to James. James took his hand and put it in the same spot he placed mine. Steve began to murmur to the horse as well, as James guided his hand in a stroking pattern. All of us were completely entranced with the creature in front of us. Steve stepped away and James looked to the owner and asked, "That trailer is a mess. You got a place I can exercise him while Steve and Natalie clean it up for him?"

He looked at James skeptically but moved toward the open barn doors, James and the horse following slowly after him. After they were out of sight, presumably one of the employees approached with shovels and other tools to help us clean up the trailer. Steve grabbed one of the pitchforks and immediately began cleaning out the muck that had accumulated from almost a month of a horse living in there. It was a gross and dirty process, but we knew it would be worth it. Once Steve had cleaned out all the muck, I was handed a hose with a spray nozzle on the end and went to town clearing out any leftover mud or what have you. It took about 20 minutes, but it was worth it. The trailer was clean again and after I swept out the remaining water and wiped down the floor of the trailer, Steve came back hauling a bale of hay that easily could have been equal to his and James's weight combined. He cut open the bale and began to throw hay into the trailer, making a nice comfortable place for the gentle giant to rest. Once the hay was in place, we could refill his food and water troughs, making sure they were ready for the journey home. Just as we were finishing, we heard James come back in with the horse and when we looked up, he looked on top of the world.

His face was split open with a wide grin, his cheeks were flushed with exertion and cold, and he looked more relaxed than I had ever seen him. Also, the horse looked calmer than it had all morning. They both walked in and James was still whispering to the horse. As they approached James looked inside the trailer and smiled. He nodded back at us and brought the beautiful animal into the now clean trailer. He slowly came back out and closed up the doors, looking as though he was floating on cloud nine. He returned to us and breathed, "He's mine."

Steve and I both replied, "Ours."

I didn't think it was possible, but James's grin grew a few sizes and he turned to the owner and said, "We'll take him. You got anything that he came with?"

The owner looked stunned, completely bowled over by the turn of events. Steve and I were holding back chuckles as James waited for the answer. The man turned and walked away, returning a few minutes later with a simple lead. He handed it over and said, "That's it."

James looked back at us and we nodded, letting him know he was in charge of this. "How much do you want for him and the trailer?"

The man just stared at James in shock. It took him minutes to recover and when he did, he still stuttered through saying, "I'll give you the horse for a base fee and charge you for the market cost of the trailer."

We could see James thinking it over and without missing a beat, he replied, "Half price for the horse and full, as if brand new, value for the trailer."

The man had an inscrutable expression on his face. He stared at James as if he had grown a second head, but said, "Deal."

James smiled and turned back, his face lit up like a kid. 


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut is in italics, but there is some story there. Also, italics represent the past.

**Steve POV**

Driving home with our new horse made me smile. I was thrilled that we were able to save this horse from its previous life, but also that Bucky seemed to have connected so strongly with this incredible creature. I was really interested as to how this horse was going to add to our lives and help bring Buck out of his shell. I hoped that it would show Bucky that he could trust and it would help to give him a reason to move forward in his recovery. I couldn't be sure, but based on the look on his face and on Nat's face, I knew this was going to be a wonderfully positive development for all of us. 

\--

A month later, and everything had really settled down for us. Bucky had been spending more nights with us than not, and his sleeping schedule was getting more regular. He still stayed up far too late for Nat or my liking, but he was often in bed by a little past midnight, which was a good start. He often would wake up mid-morning and go see our horse, which he'd named Voin, which means warrior in Russian. He normally spent a few hours with him, just acclimating him to the barn, running him through some paces in the paddock, and getting him used to the saddle and the other accouterments. Bucky's patience was remarkable and it was always interesting to watch him with Voin. He turned into someone different and someone that I was slowly falling in love with.

Once he was done with his training, he would often ask that one of us go with him to the med suite we set up to help acclimate him to some of the equipment. It was a slow process because everything was scary for him, but we took our time and made sure that we were going at a slow pace. He wanted to start with the dental tools because I could tell he was getting tired of the lack of variety in his diet. As he came more and more out of his shell, he seemed to hate the lack of variety. But, he handled it like a champ and was determined to recover. We had meeting after meeting with the dental surgeon, who was more than willing to come to the house and help with the surgeries. It had taken some convincing, but we agreed that the best place to start was dentures. Bucky was determined to be against that, but Nat and I both thought it would be a better option for now, not only because it was faster, but because it was less invasive. All that really needed to happen was to have the old teeth removed and then have some dentures made and modeled. It was a simple process and after Bucky got used to everything else and was further into his recovery, we could worry about looking into other options for teeth. Nat and I also had both been working with a local physical therapist to learn all the ways we could help Bucky repair his broken muscles. Nat had been working with him a little bit in massage, but it was slow going because he was still very touch resistant.

One thing Nat and I were really focused on was taking time for ourselves. I was still having my weekly therapy sessions which were helping so much. It was helping me to see lots of things about my life that I hadn't noticed, the biggest of which was that I took on responsibility for things that were not my fault. I took on guilt for things that were not mine to take on and it only made my life more miserable. Nat had taken a few hours every day to spend in the gym because I knew that helped her calm down. Whenever she came back to the house I could see the smile on her face and it felt like everything was finally right with her after she came back. Often that was when she and I would spend a little time together. Since we'd gotten together formally just after DC, we'd spent a little time with each other, but so much of our energy was focused on getting everything together and finding Bucky that we weren't really focused on each other or on our own wants and needs. After finding Bucky, things were so hectic and chaotic, we had even less time to focus on us. Plus, we were both quite remiss to start anything without Bucky. I guess we were a little bit more obvious about it than we planned because around two weeks after adopting Voin, before Buck went out to work with him, he said, forcefully, "Please stop waiting on me. It's going to be a while. If you two want that from each other, please don't wait for me."

We looked between ourselves and both of us blushed. Nat was the one to speak, "We're okay to wait, James. It's not like Steve or I need something right this moment."

"I'm not saying you do. What I am saying is that you shouldn't have to wait for me to get what you need. Or you shouldn't only rely on yourselves to get your needs met when you have each other. I've seen the looks. I might be dealing with horrific trauma and plenty of other issues, but I can see the tension between the two of you. Please don't worry about me. I don't think I could even get it up if I wanted to and any time I wake up between you two, I can feel Steve. While in a previous life that would have thrilled me, right now it only makes me nervous. I have a lot more recovering to do, but you two shouldn't have to wait for me. When I'm ready, you'll know it and I promise everything will be okay."

Since then, Nat and I had taken plenty of time to explore and get to know each other. On our drive to Camp Lehigh, Nat had asked me if she was my first kiss since 1945. I told her I was 95, not dead, but that wasn't the whole truth. Since waking up from the ice, I hadn't had a relationship. I was okay with that. I didn't need someone and as time passed and I fell for Nat, I only wanted her. But before I went into the ice, after Project Rebirth, I wasn't the blushing virgin Tony or Nat liked to think of me as. I might not have understood a bloody thing about women (and I still often didn't), but I made the rounds. I had plenty of relations with plenty of women, many of which were the chorus girls I performed with. Plus, when the Commandos were in any town saving people and doing our jobs, women often flocked to us because we were heroes. While Buck nor I had relations with each other, we had plenty of relations with the same woman, one right after another. We would trade women back and forth between us, and while at the time it made me feel like a bit of an asshole, looking back, I knew it was something that I needed. It provided me with a break from all the trouble I was dealing with and allowed me to have some peace.

Nat was not prepared for this, so the first time we did anything remotely sexual she decided to take control. I wasn't particularly mad at that, because I liked when a woman took control. I liked how strong and fierce Nat was, so I just let it ride. In reality, I let her have control a lot of the time. I didn't feel the need to be so dominant about the whole thing. But, I remember the first time I decided to take control of things.

_We were settled in bed, Buck out at the barn taking care of Voin. We had both spent a little time at the gym and we were both a little keyed up. I loved watching Nat work out, not only because she was beautiful and I was a red-blooded man who loved her, but also because she was more graceful than I could ever hope to be. She had told me constantly that I was closing in on her, but I knew I would never be at her level. She had also told me that she loved watching me because of the power in my body. She was clearly attracted to that and she loved seeing the power that I possessed._

_When we returned from the gym, I was getting ready to shower when Nat asked me to join her in bed. I did as asked, knowing where this was heading and wanting to maybe take a small chance. I laid down next to her and she sidled up to me and we began to make out. Almost instantly, I felt blood rush to my groin. I knew I had the time and I knew Nat was the type to want to take her time. We settled against each other, hands wandering and lips together. My hands ran over her back and down to the hem of her shirt. I snuck my hand under her shirt to the small of her back and just brushed there. I could feel her shiver in my arms, so I pulled away from her mouth and began to kiss down her face to her neck. One thing that I had discovered in our explorations of each other was that Nat's neck was one of her strongest erogenous spots. It was incredibly sensitive and I wanted to see what would happen. I kissed down the column of her throat and I could feel the moan vibrate through her. I grinned and continued, kissing and licking my way around her neck. Once I reached up by her ear, I began to nibble at her skin and I listened as she let out a gasp and a moan._

_I nibbled on her ear some as well, continuing to brush my hand on the small of her back. As I nibbled and brushed, I listened as she made all sorts of wonderful noises. I released her earlobe from my grip and pulled back. She flopped onto her back and was breathing heavily. She whispered, "Damn, Rogers."_

_I might have blushed a little, but I grinned and said, "I'm glad you're impressed, Romanoff."_

_She grinned and sat back up and began pulling off her clothes. I did the same and soon we were both stripped down to underwear. Her black sport's bra and simple cotton underwear did something to me, and I could feel the wetness in my own briefs, along with the large tent that had formed almost instantly. Nat had seen me naked before and she knew how big I was, but I saw her eyes widen just slightly. I wasn't sure what the reason was, but I knew it might have been from the realization that I was as well endowed as I was. She fell back onto the pillows and I took that as my cue to climb over her. I leaned down to her ear and whispered, "You sure you're alright with this?"_

_I could feel her small smile and she whispered back, "You'll know it if I'm not. Now get to it, Rogers."_

_My grin turned from happy to feral with arousal, so I captured her ear in my teeth and felt her arch into me. My hands wandered her torso, brushing the soft, pale skin that I was so enamored with. Her hands were brushing my torso, pulling at the dusting of hair that I had on my chest. Most people didn't know it, but as a man at the peak of human physiology, my hair grew back faster than most and that meant everywhere. Back in the war, I was forced to shave most of my body hair because it would catch sometimes on the uniform. It was the one thing I hated. When I woke up from the ice, I realized that many men now did it because they wanted to, not because they had to. I really wasn't into the idea, but after seeing the uniform that Coulson had so lovingly designed, I knew I was going to have to keep doing it. When SHIELD designed me the stealth suit, I didn't have to do it as often, but I did it more than I would have liked to. _

_Since leaving SHIELD, I had stopped completely, allowing a significant portion of my body hair to grow back. Nat traced a path down my chest and I shivered at the contact. I pulled away from her ear and kissed down to her clavicle, right in the valley above her breasts. She was heaving at the contact and I couldn't keep the smile off my face. I slipped my hands under the sports bra she was wearing and in one fell swoop, pulled if off and over her head. I tossed it away and watched as her breasts settled back down. Her breathing was causing them to shift frequently, so I continue to kiss down the valley, moving between her breasts and down to her stomach and torso. One hand was following my lips, brushing her skin, while the other had gotten one of her nipples and was flicking and tweaking it. The moans and grunts were getting more and more vocal and I felt like I was floating on cloud nine. I hadn't gotten this in a long ass time and I felt like it was long past time for me to have this._

_As I kissed down her stomach, I stopped at her belly button and moved over to kiss the scar left by the Winter Soldier. I placed several kisses on the remaining scar and whispered, "You still look beautiful."_

_I heard more than saw Nat's release of air at the compliment and the grin on my face only grew. I released her nipple and used both hands to pull off her underwear. Once she was laid bare before me, I spread her legs out and settled between them, almost hypnotized at the sight of her bare flesh. I leaned down and kissed from her belly button down to her core, where she was musky and wet with need. As I flicked my tongue out to taste her, she moaned quite loudly. I continued my exploration with my tongue and every flick brought out a new noise. It was intoxicating for me, so I continued. I pressed harder every now and then, changing the sensation for her. She was being very vocal, calling out all sorts of things, many of them being a variation on, "Fuck, Steve."_

_After having tasted enough of her, I knew it was time for me to get her off. I knew a woman could have multiple orgasms, or else Bucky and I wouldn't have been able to trade women as easily as we did. So, I decided to use my fingers first before worrying about me. I resettled and pressed one finger into Nat. She was warm and tight around me and I could feel the strength of her muscles, even as she shifted with each press. I added fingers one by one, opening her up and searching for the spot inside of her. I had done it a few times in the past and I was interested to see how she reacted. When I did finally find her spot, she tightened up, her back bowed, and she let out a noise that had never heard her make before, a combination of a grunt, a wail, and a moan. It sent tingles up my spine, and I couldn't wipe the smile off my face. _

_I continued to press that spot, varying my speed and pressure every now and again. Nat was gasping at everything I was doing, and I could tell based on the pressure against my fingers that she was close. I leaned down and flicked my tongue on the sensitive nub of flesh and I finally felt the satisfaction of her tightening and letting out a long moan. She collapsed back on the bed, out of breath and exhausted. She looked up at me and said, between breaths, "Damn, Rogers. You continue to surprise me."_

_I chuckled, climbing back up toward her head and the bedside table and said, "I ain't even started, love." I reached a hand out to the bedside table on my side and grabbed a condom. Nat had revealed to me that the way the Red Room graduated her was to sterilize her, via tubal ligation. My heart broke at the horrors that had been inflicted upon both Nat and Bucky through HYDRA, but I had explained to her that everything about me was super, including my sperm. While I wasn't totally sure they would break through the sterilization, I didn't want to risk it. She had stared at me, wide-eyed, asking if I was sure. I nodded, remembering a lot of what Erskine had explained to me long before the procedure. He'd given me a lot of information about what the procedure would do to me, and because of my memory, I'd never forgotten it. _

_So, I rolled on the condom and got back to work. I pressed in and watched as Nat's eyes widened at the sensation. I leaned down to kiss her and she kissed back with just as much fervor and passion. I continued to press in, listening for any sounds of pain or discomfort. There didn't seem to be any, so after I was fully seated inside her, I pulled out and slammed back home, releasing a loud moan. I continued this, pushing harder and harder. Nat's legs made their way around my waist, locking together at the base of my spine. I continued, encouraged by the, "Faster, Steve"'s I was getting from her. I went faster and harder and she was floating higher and higher. She whispered, "Close," and that was all I needed. I pressed one more time, hard, and I could feel her tighten around me, which caused my iron-clad control to snap and I felt myself release. She fell back onto the bed, spent, while I pulled out and quickly cleaned myself up. I tied off the condom and threw it in the trash that was by the bed. I fell next to Nat and she whispered, "Holy shit, Rogers. You didn't say you were good in bed."_

_I chuckled and replied, "Not something I advertise, Nat."_

_Before she could say another word, FRIDAY interrupted with, "James would like to know if he can come in."_

_I grinned and replied, "As long as he doesn't mind us naked and sweaty, sure."_

_There wasn't a reply, but about a minute later, the door eased open and Buck was standing in the threshold. He leaned against the door jam and said, "Ah, I know that look, Natalia."_

_She actually blushed at that statement and I admonished, "Buck!"_

_"What? I've seen that look on hundreds of women's faces, stumbling on wobbly legs out of whatever hidey-hole you were using. Generally, I got my turn, but no one could ever live up to Captain America and his super dick."_

_Nat actually had the audacity to laugh at that and she said, "I don't know if it was just the super dick. That was a nice finish, but those super fingers and super tongue were a pretty good deal."_

_Bucky burst out laughing and I was turning redder and redder. Bucky climbed into bed and said, "Everything he knows, he learned from me."_

_I exclaimed, "LIES! You weren't even with me the first time I did anything with a woman."_

_"So? I told you everything you needed to know," Buck argued back._

_"No, you didn't. You hardly told me anything because you didn't think I would ever get laid no matter how many women you decided to set me up with."_

_"Fine. Even if I did think you would never get laid, when I saw you in Azzano, I knew I had a lot to teach you. But once I saw a girl come out of one of your hidey holes, I knew you had it all in hand."_

Ever since then, Nat and I spent regular time together worshiping each other, and making sure we were getting what we needed. Almost always, Bucky would join us in bed afterward and take a short nap with us while we recovered. 


	27. Chapter 27

**Natasha POV**

Seeing how mine and Steve's relationship was changing was making me feel as if I was becoming someone new. I'd had sex with plenty of men for plenty of reasons. Many times it was in order to get close enough to kill them, but sometimes it was for my own enjoyment or just because I could. With Steve, it truly felt like we were partners in everything. For the longest time when we started having a more sexual relationship, he let me take the lead. It was a little surprising, but at the same time not because I knew Steve and I knew that he had a thing for powerful women. What I did not expect, however, was for him to be so proficient in bed.

When he took control, which wasn't often, but happened every now and again, he became a different person, and it allowed me to release some of the control I had on myself and just let myself feel. It allowed me to just be, rather than having to think about everything and be aware of everything all the time. More than that, it was some of the best sex I'd ever had in my life. Honestly, Steve was like some sort of sex demon. It was shocking that he didn't take more often than he gave, but that was just part of Steve's personality. Every time we finished, like clockwork, James would come in and lay with us, a knowing smile on his face. It made me laugh to think that James had never experienced sex with Steve and only knew of his sexual prowess through other women. It was going to be interesting when James was finally ready, that was for certain.

Additionally, Steve was the sweetest about all of my challenges. I had told him about the sterilization process the Red Room had put me through, and he'd really done his research. A few days after our first time, he came into our room with a look on his face that tracked good news, but I could tell Steve was nervous about something. We settled on the bed and he continued to watch me. I asked, "Steve? What's wrong?"

"It's reversible."

I paused for just a moment before asking, "What's reversible?"

"Your tubes, Nat. They can be fixed so you can have a baby."

My world screeched to a halt. Never in my life had I felt like I did right then. It dawned on me that this opened up a whole new world of possibilities for myself, Steve, and James. I felt my eyes well up with tears and I flew into Steve's arms and cried. I felt like there was finally a chance for me to have everything I wanted. It was a beautiful and happy moment in my life and I knew my world would never be the same.

\--

Mid-morning, about a month after adopting Voin and after one of Steve and my more athletic rounds of sex, my phone rang. I checked the number to see Clint's name. I picked up with, "And to what do I owe this call, Agent Barton?"

"Well, Agent Romanoff, I got a text from you before the new year and haven't heard from you. I'd like to come and see you."

I grinned and said, "Sorry about that. Ran into a bit of an emergency that needed to be handled. Now's a better time for you to come."

"Everyone?" he asked, after hesitating.

"Of course. As long as it's okay with you, it's fine with me, and I'll explain everything to Steve and James."

"Alrighty. Text me the address?" he replied, voice more certain.

"Of course. See you soon, Agent Barton."

"Likewise, Agent Romanoff.

We hung up the phone and Steve was watching me with a confused expression. I asked, "It's still okay if Clint comes to visit?"

"Of course."

"Then I guess it's time you know that Clint isn't single," I told him, waiting for his reaction.

His eyebrow went up and he asked, "He's not single?"

"Nope, been with his wife for as long as I've known him," I explained.

"Wife?" Steve asked.

"Yup. Laura. She's amazing. You'll love her."

"So Clint and his wife are coming?" Steve asked, clarifying.

"Plus Lila and Cooper," I added.

"And they are?" he asked.

"Clint and Laura's kids."

Steve's jaw fell open and I just smiled at his shock. I grinned and allowed him to process that while I turned and began thinking about things we could do while they were here, and how I could explain things to them about James. It was going to be difficult to explain to the kids, not only because they were so young, but because I hadn't really given them any details about my experience. All they knew of me was I was Auntie Nat and I was a friend of their dad's. I'd spent a lot of time with Clint and his family when I was debriefing after he brought me in, but Clint didn't want anyone to know. The kids hadn't been born yet, so I told Laura some stuff, but we all agreed that we didn't want the kids to know when they knew Cooper was on the way.

As I was thinking, I could feel Steve was still thinking too, I asked, "FRIDAY, is James in the barn?"

"No, Natasha. He's been back for a bit and he is reading in his room."

"Thanks, FRIDAY." I got up and kissed Steve, dressed, and went to see James. I knocked on his door and with a quiet, come in, I opened the door and saw him on the bed reading. I settled next to him on the bed and asked, "Remember when I was telling you about my friend Clint?"

"The one who's the best marksman in the world?" he replied, voice laced with skepticism.

"Yes, him. I invited him to come to visit before the new year but decided it wasn't a good time with you still at the beginning of your recovery. I told him to hold off and he just called me asking if now was a good time. I wanted to ask you if it's okay if Clint and his family come to see us," I explained.

"Family?" he asked.

"Yeah. Clint's married and has two kids. Clint was the one to bring me into SHIELD and I spent a lot of time with him and Laura when I was debriefing. I've known them as long as I've been in the States as an agent of SHIELD. Do you think you'll be okay?" I asked.

"I don't think I'll know until I try, but I've always loved kids and that's something that hasn't changed. HYDRA may have forced me to do despicable things, but one thing they could never make me do was hurt a child. So, no, I don't have a problem with them coming as long as we can set some boundaries."

"Of course. I'll get in touch and make sure they all know your boundaries. Any you want me to know about?"

"No unsolicited touch, no surprises, and no sudden or loud noises," he replied, voice clipped.

"So same as me when I first met Laura and Clint. They'll understand, but it might take the kids some time to get used to it."

"I don't know if those boundaries apply to the kids, but let them know and we'll see how it goes," he told me, voice confident, but also slightly wary.

I nodded and asked, "How's Voin doing?"

"Getting better every day and helping me to feel better every day."

"Well, that's good news. I don't know if the kids have ever met a horse. I know Clint and Laura have, but maybe we can see how Voin reacts to them. Plus, Lila loves horses."

"I don't know if that's the best idea," he replied, hesitancy all over his tone, "He's gotten pretty used to me, but I don't know how he'd react to you or Steve, let alone a complete stranger."

"I don't know, James, you might be surprised."


	28. Chapter 28

A week after chatting, Clint was almost here. He had texted me earlier, letting me know he had been in touch with Tony, who had set him up with a rental car and everything at the airport. He had texted me early this morning that they had landed, so I was up early, making sure the house was ready. I let Steve and James sleep in a little, but I woke them up when Clint texted me that they were about two hours out. While they were getting ready, I did a last-minute check on the house and went to find James and check-in. I knew he was nervous about meeting Clint, Laura, and the kids, but I had explained everything to Clint and Laura and I knew they would explain to the kids. I hoped everything would go okay.

I knocked on the door to James's room and there was a soft, come in. I entered the room and he was on his bed. He looked up at me and said, "I can't decide if I'm excited or scared."

"You can be both."

He continued to look at me and then finally said, "Yeah, I think I'm both."

I nodded and said, "That's okay. Clint is excited to meet you."

He nodded. I quickly placed a kiss on his forehead and said, "Come out. We're family here, and I'm sure the kids are going to want to meet their new Uncles together."

"Uncles?"

"Yup. I'm Auntie Nat, so you and Steve must be Uncles," I explained.

His eyes widened and he seemed to perk up just a little. Before I could say anything, FRIDAY interrupted with, "Natasha, I believe Clint's rental car has arrived. Should I let them in?"

"Of course, FRIDAY. Where's Steve?"

"He is in the kitchen."

I grabbed James's hand and we both headed to the kitchen to grab Steve so we could go out and greet the Bartons. Steve was in the kitchen sipping a glass of water and he looked up at our arrival and asked, "They're here?"

"Yup."

He put down his glass and we all headed out to the front porch. The pups were in their crates, not only because we knew they'd be excitable, but because we didn't know how the kids were going to react. We stood on the porch, waiting, and eventually, we heard the sound of a car coming up the path. I settled next to Steve, who had his arm around my shoulder, and James was on my other side, still holding one of my hands. The car pulled up into the driveway, and Clint hopped out of the car. His eyes were wide and he walked up quickly. I separated myself from Steve and James and gave Clint a big hug. He whispered, "Tony wasn't joking when he said this was a nice place."

I chuckled but didn't say anything. We parted and Clint looked to Steve. His face was a little bit unreadable, but I could see something shining through. He stuck out a hand to Steve and Steve grabbed on and pulled Clint into a hug. I heard Steve whisper, "I'm glad you're okay."

Clint chuckled in response, and said, "I think I'm the one who's supposed to be saying that."

Steve grinned and they separated and Clint finally turned to James. I felt him shift next to me, but I saw the sympathy in Clint's face. He smiled and said, "Hi. Clint Barton."

"James Barnes."

Clint nodded and asked, "I don't have to worry?"

"You're fine. If you weren't, Natalia wouldn't have let you come."

Clint nodded and turned to the car, where Laura and the kids were waiting. He ushered them over, and the three of them came running. Laura was the first to arrive and she wrapped me in her arms. She whispered, "Wow."

I laughed aloud and replied, "I know."

She let me go and I was hit with Lila. I lifted her up and she hugged me. Cooper was standing right next to me, so I bent down and picked him up too. I held them close and whispered, "You want to meet your Uncle Steve and Uncle James?"

They both hesitated and seemed to all of a sudden became shy. I whispered, "They're both excited to meet you."

That perked them up and they pulled their heads off my shoulders and I turned to Steve first and said, "Lila and Cooper, this is Steve."

"Hi Lila, hi Cooper," he said, looking both of them in the eye.

Both of them looked critically at Steve and then Lila asked, "How did you meet Auntie Nat?"

"Well, we met through your dad. We both work with your dad, but I hadn't met your Auntie Nat here until a few years ago. But I'm so excited to meet you both and get to know your mom too."

I could feel Laura's blush, and Lila looked at me and asked, "Why didn't you tell us about Uncle Steve?"

I smiled and said, "Because your dad wants you to be safe. I know Steve would never tell anyone, but not everything is that simple, Lila bug."

Cooper looked over Steve and asked, "Are you a superhero like dad is?"

"I used to be, and every now and then, I might be, but not anymore."

"Why not?" he asked, eyebrows crinkled.

"Because I've been doing that for a long time. It was time for me to find something else to do with my life."

Cooper seemed to accept that, so I turned and said, "Now this is Uncle James. You can also call him Uncle Bucky."

I saw both of their eyebrows crinkle, and James said, "It was a nickname. Or it is a nickname. Hi Lila, hi Cooper."

They both stared at James and again, Lila asked, "How do you know Auntie Nat?"

"We knew each other a long time ago. Before your Dad met Auntie Nat, she and I were friends."

"Did you meet Uncle Steve through Dad also?" she asked.

"No, Uncle Stevie and I go way back. Even further than me and your Auntie Nat."

Her eyes widened to saucers and I could tell she was processing that information. Cooper then decided to ask, "What happened to your arm?"

"I served in the army, and something bad happened to me. But don't you worry, Cooper, I've got some of the best people in the world working on a shiny new arm for me."

"Really?"

"Really. Now, why don't you let Auntie Nat put you down, so you can get settled into your rooms, okay?"

They both nodded so I put them back on the floor and we all trooped into the house.


	29. Chapter 29

After getting everyone settled into their respective rooms, a tour was given, and the pups introduced, we all settled in the kitchen while Steve cooked. Clint and Laura were sticking close together and the kids remained close to them, but I could see in their eyes that they wanted to get closer to Steve and James. Steve could see it too because when he came to a break in the cooking, he looked at the two of them and said, "You know, if you asked your Uncle Bucky, I'm sure he'd love to have one of you sit with him. And I know I'd love a little company while I cook."

They both brightened and Lila headed for Steve, while Cooper beelined for James. James had a soft smile on his face and boosted Cooper onto his lap. He settled in and began muttering to James about something. Lila was cuddled against Steve's hip and was prattling a mile a minute about other things. Clint and Laura caught my eye and I grinned at both of them. They grinned back and soon, dinner was ready and we all trooped into the dining room. It was a loud and boisterous affair, but I wouldn't have it any other way. Once we finished up, Laura and Clint agreed to do the dishes, to many protests, but they wouldn't take no for an answer. James, Steve, and I settled on the couch with the kids and flipped on something for all of us to watch.

Once Clint and Laura were done, they took the kids upstairs and got them ready for bed. While they were doing that, Steve whispered, "I love those kids."

"Knew you would," I replied, a knowing smile on my face.

"They're great," James added, a smile on his lips.

The grin on my face only grew and I was looking forward to seeing how the rest of this would go.

\--

The following morning, James woke up earlier than normal and I could tell that this was going to be one of his bad days. He was tense and very quiet, along with being quite morose. As breakfast rolled around and everyone was waking up, I could see the mood falling off of him, but something was sticking to him. I couldn't tell what it was, but it was bothering me. James left to go and explore more of the med suite, which he'd been doing daily, so I followed behind him. He settled into the massage room, and I took that as a chance to work on him while he talked about whatever was bothering him. He seemed to ramble for a while, but he finally reached what was wrong: he was scared of hurting Lila and Cooper. I smiled and said, "That's okay, my love. I know you won't hurt them because you're scared."

"But what happens if I do?" he asked.

"We'll deal with it if it happens. We can't be focused on what might be. We have to focus on what is. Both of them love you already and children are quite resilient."

He sighed, muscles relaxing more under my touch. I'd been working on him for a bit, and he was slowly healing. He wasn't ready for any big procedures by any means, but he was slowly getting used to touch more, and he was becoming more accepting. I wasn't doing any hardcore massage yet, because I knew that would be painful, but I was just rubbing my hands over his back and shoulders, in order to get him more used to the touch. He had been a champion about it, really trying to get used to it. He wanted to heal, and I think he was trying his best. I was really proud of him.


	30. Chapter 30

**Steve POV**

Having the Bartons over was amazing. Clint and Laura were an adorable couple and Lila and Cooper were amazing kids. My heart was in their hands, even if I hadn't intended to hand it over. But, even as amazing as they all were, I still had my bad days. Working with Dr. Miller, she'd come to help me realize that I had depression and anxiety. I hadn't told Nat or Bucky, but I knew she was right. Dr. Miller had recommended medication to help, but I knew with my advanced metabolism and all of the other serum enhancements, it wouldn't work, and if it did, I would have to take a dose so large it would no longer be safe. I had some days where everything felt hard. Getting out of bed became a task, and dealing with people was something that drained me. So, generally on my bad days, I kept to my office. With the Bartons over, I didn't want to ignore them, but I couldn't really handle it right now.

My office had become my space for reflection. When we first moved in, I had wanted to make it a time capsule, but Nat convinced me that I should be focused on moving forward, not stuck in the past. I might have fought her on it, but she ended up being right. The walls were painted a simple grey, along with a simple black desk. I didn't want the space to be overcrowded and I needed a place that was calm. My office had become that place. Having my dark days was a little easier with my office being there. I could sketch in peace and ignore the rest of the world. Until that is, some part of the world came knocking.

I was sitting in my comfy desk chair, sketching, when there was a knock at my door. I sighed, placing the sketchbook and pencil down and asking FRIDAY, "Who is it?"

"Clint," she replied.

"Come in," I called.

The door opened and Clint slipped in and shut the door behind him. He looked at me for a while and asked, "Everything okay, Steve?"

"Just having a bad day, Clint," I sighed.

His face smoothed out, but he said, "Anything I can do to help?"

"Not really. What can I do for you, Clint?"

He paused, seeming to gather his wits about him and he said, "Nat let me in on some of the things you told Tony when you first came back after DC. I just want you to know I think it's the right move."

I could feel my heart stutter in shock. I stared at Clint and all I could get out was, "What?"

Clint smiled and said, "I think it's the right choice for you to get out. You fought your war, Steve. You fought enough wars for one lifetime. You don't need to fight any more of them. Plus, I've gotten the feeling, being here, that Nat likes this life she has with you and James. I bet, if she saw you lay down that shield, she wouldn't be far behind."

I was still gobsmacked, but after processing his words, I realized he was right. I really had meant what I said when I talked to Tony. I was done with the fighting. I wanted to just live my life. But then what would I do? That was the next thing that came to my mind, and it was what I asked Clint.

He smiled and said, "I don't know, Steve. What do you want to do?"

I shrugged, feeling like I did when Sam asked me that question at the VA in DC. Clint looked at me and asked, "Ever think about nursing?"

"Nursing?" I asked.

"Yeah. Like working in a hospital."

"I know what a nurse is, Clint. My mother worked as one," I replied, voice dry, "But I don't know if I could do that."

"Why not?"

"It seems too boring," I replied voice small.

"Hm. Ever thought about being a paramedic?"

"A paramedic?" I asked.

"Yeah. The people who drive ambulances."

"Clint. I know what a paramedic is. I'm not an invalid. I just never thought of that," I said, trying to process while speaking.

"It seems like a good option to me. Being able to help people, while sometimes getting the heart-stopping fun of being in an emergency situation. And if that's not to your liking, you should become a trauma nurse or an ER doctor. Helping people, but still having some of that adrenaline."

I paused, taking in his words and allowing them to permeate through my brain. The next time I looked up, he was gone, and I was left in peace. I really would have to take into account what Clint had said. But first, I needed to email Tony and let him know the news. 


	31. Chapter 31

_Tony—_

_For as long as I can remember, I've just wanted to serve and protect. I was so desperate to serve my country that I was willing to become a lab rat for your father. When I got my chance, I ended up becoming a dancing monkey. I wasn't necessarily okay with it, but I could accept it. I could accept it until I heard the love of my life was missing. I went against orders and chain of command to save his life and I would do it again. For years after that, I did what I had wanted to do for so long. I saved people. I liberated concentration camps and took down base after base. But, all good things must come to an end, and when the love of my life fell from that train, I knew my heart had gone with him. Peggy told me to honor his choice, but I was too broken._

_That's why I crashed the plane. I couldn't live in a world without James Buchanan Barnes. I was weak without him. But, my eyes opened and I was in the future. Fury recruited me and I did it because I didn't have anything else. Since I woke up, my heart hasn't been in anything. I've done it, but I hated every minute. Then, when I saw the love of my life on that causeway in DC, I knew everything would be okay. Since Nat and I moved out here and found James, I finally love my life. I'm finally happy. Happier than I've ever been, even when I wasn't a weakling anymore._

_What I'm trying to say, Tony is that I can't be the leader of the Avengers anymore. I can't find it in me to fake it when I have this life that I love right here. It wouldn't be the right thing to do by you and the rest of the team, and it wouldn't be the right thing to do by Nat and Bucky. I'm going to keep the uniform because I need that reminder, but I want you to pass the shield on to someone else (I have it on good authority there is a winged pararescue soldier who might fit the bill). Give it to someone who wants it, because I really don't, and after thinking about it, I never really did._

_I am still here as a friend and fellow, Tony. If you need anything, you let me know and I will come to your aid. Just not as Captain America. Maybe now as something else. As a wanderer. But I will be there when or if you need me, okay?_

_And don't be a stranger. Come out and see us. We still miss you and everyone. We'll come and see you too._

_Be well, Tony, and send the team my love._

_Captain Steve Rogers_

_PS: If you don't want to come up with a reason that I've left, release this. It explains everything. Also, tell Pepper not to work too hard on the PR campaign. I'm done caring about what other people think, and we're safe here. Also, call me if you need anything. Please. You're too much like your father for your own good and I'd like to see you be better._

I read that email a thousand times before I hit send, but the moment I did, it felt like there was a weight lifted off my shoulders. I felt like I could finally breathe after being underwater for a thousand years. My heart felt lighter and I felt the smile on my face. I settled everything in my office and asked FRIDAY, "Where are Bucky and Nat?"

"Everyone is in the living room. Natasha and James were in the massage suite for a little while, but they were done and came in to spend time with Laura and the kids while you were talking to Clint. They've been watching movies."

"Excellent."

I headed down into the living room to see Nat and Bucky cuddled together, Clint and Laura cuddled together, and Lila and Cooper cuddled between them. Bucky's eyes were closed, but I could tell he was awake, Clint was dead to the world, and Lila and Cooper were on their last legs. I grinned at the sight, and headed to lift up Lila to settle next to Nat. Once I was comfortable, Nat was leaning on me and Lila was in my lap, finally having given up on staying awake. I could feel Nat's eyes on me, and I knew she noticed something, but I didn't want to say anything. Once the film they were watching was over, Laura gently woke Clint up and they brought the kids up for naps. Nat was still looking at me, and now that Bucky was awake, he was looking at me too.

Nat finally broke the silence with, "You look different."

"I know."

"What happened?" she asked.

"Nothing bad."

"I knew that. But what happened?" she deadpanned.

"I'm putting it down, Nat. We won my war and it's time I moved on."

Her eyes grew wide and I watched as the gears turned in her head. I looked at Bucky, who seemed to have a similar look on his face and I chuckled at both of them. Nat finally came out of her surprise with, "Wow, Steve. Any plans?"

"I'm not quite sure yet, but I have a few ideas. A little birdie gave me some suggestions."

"Would that little birdie happen to be the one upstairs with his children?" Nat asked.

I chuckled lowly and said, "Yeah, it might have been, but he wasn't on the wrong track."

Nat sighed and said, "Finally."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked.

"It means that I was waiting for you to leave and not come back."

"I'm not going anywhere, Nat. I'm here for the rest of our natural-born lives. And if I do leave, it's not forever. It's just for a while," I said, voice soft.

Bucky was staring at me and asked, "What are you going to do, Stevie?"

"Well, Bucky, I was thinking of following in my Ma's footsteps."

"Dying of tuberculosis?" he asked, voice skeptical.

"No, you idiot. Medicine and nursing."

"Oh. I think that might be a good idea, Stevie," he replied, thoughtful.

"I know. Once Clint and company leave, I'll start looking into options."

"The best place to start would be getting your Bachelors. Or actually, asking FRIDAY if she can provide some testing to see where your at on your own so you can maybe skip the Bachelors and go right to the MCAT," Nat mused.

"Well, I'm not doing anything about it now, when Clint and family are here. Once they leave, we can deal with that."

"Okay," she agreed.


	32. Chapter 32

The Bartons stayed with us for another five days and it was a wonderful time. The kids were little bundles of energy and Clint and Laura were wonderful company. But Laura needed to return for her work, and the kids had missed enough school. Seeing them leave, I knew the Barton family had become my own. Nat had brought us together and we had connected tighter than ever. Plus, I loved seeing Bucky interact with the kids. They brought something out in him that I thought was long gone, and it was highly gratifying to see it come out. But, after they left, I knew it was time to begin my research on options for a career in medicine.

My search began and I was immediately overwhelmed. But one thing I knew was the only way out of this decision was through it. So, I forged on. I forged through site after site, telling me what my options were. Many of them I could discard right away. I wasn't interested in Plastic Surgery or Oncology. I didn't want to do OB or Medical Ethics. Honestly, the one that kept standing out to me was Emergency Medicine. It seemed like a best of both worlds option for me, where I could help people, but also be able to get the adrenaline rush that I had grown to love (or always loved, if you asked Bucky).

My searches led me lots of places, but the place I kept getting stalled at was the need for a Bachelors Degree. I didn't go to college and I barely finished high school, so I had nothing to really show for my learning. But I knew I had a few options. One of them was to ask FRIDAY for help and see what she came up with. Another was to make fake records. The one that I thought was the best was calling the head of whatever school I decided on and explaining everything to them. I felt it was the most honest, without having to do any real extra work.

Thus began my search for Medical Schools. I was happy to narrow it down to just Pennsylvania because out of state just wasn't something I was willing to commit to. But once I made that choice, I knew my options were still quite endless. It took me far longer than I would have ever thought, but I decided on the University of Pennsylvania. I was confused about that and Penn State, but it was made clear to me through internet searches that they were two different things. The main reason I chose UPenn was that it was under an hour away from home. It wouldn't be a chore to come and go every day, which Penn State would have been. So, I searched the site for the name and number of the Dean of the Medical School. It took some doing, but I finally found their name and number. I called them up and the conversation was productive but disappointing.

I explained the situation to the Dean, and it took about fifteen minutes for them to recover from the shock of speaking with me. I was still confused as to why everyone got so weird about it, but I let it go. Once they recovered, we were able to have a wonderful conversation in which it was explained to me that I needed to have a base in order to be prepared for the process of med school and the MCATs. But, he gave me the names of several heads of departments in the undergraduate programs, so I could call them and speak with them about fast-tracking me so I didn't have to take as many classes and move faster toward the MCAT.

So, I began making phone calls. It took way longer than I would have liked, but each department head was incredibly helpful and willing to listen to what I had to say. After hours of speaking with various people in various departments, I decided the best option for me was the Biophysics major. The head of the department was incredibly kind and really willing to work with me on making sure I wasn't taking courses that I didn't need. Once we hung up the phone, I had the first steps and I was feeling better. When I finally came out of my rabbit hole, Nat and Bucky were each keeping busy. I asked FRIDAY if she could get them for me, so I could explain everything.


	33. Chapter 33

**Natasha POV**

Just as I was finished picking up the rooms that the Bartons had occupied, FRIDAY said, "Natasha, Steve would like to speak with you in the family room."

"Tell him I'll be there in a second. James too?"

"Yes, he would like to speak with both of you," she replied.

"Okay."

I grabbed the few things that needed to be moved and headed down to see Steve. He'd been in his own little world since the Bartons had left, and I knew he was going to have good news to share. Once I got down there, James was already sitting on the couch with him and they were talking quietly. I couldn't quite hear them, but I knew they were just relearning each other, which brought a smile to my face. I made sure to make noise as I entered the room and both of their heads turned to me. I settled on Steve's other side and asked, "So, what's the news?"

Steve sighed and said, "I never could get anything passed you, Romanoff. So. I just finished a shit ton of research. I think what I am going to do is apply to the University of Pennsylvania's College of Arts and Sciences. It's clear to me that I need a Bachelors in something to help me. So, I'm going for a Bachelors in Biophysics. I already spoke with the Dean of the Medical School at UPenn, and they told me this was a good option. So, I called several of the department heads and Biophysics seemed like the best one. Plus, I think they would be willing to fast track me. I just need to call the head of admissions and we can go from there. I'm hoping with my increased everything I'll be able to finish faster. Then I can take the MCAT and start at the UPenn Med School."

I stared back at Steve in shock. Not only did this sound like an amazing plan, but it also seemed to be uncharacteristically well thought out for Steve. I mean, in the field the man was a master tactician, but in life, he tended to fly by the seat of his pants. James seemed to have a similar look on his face, and he asked, "Do you know how long it will take?"

"I'm a little unclear, but the Medical Degree itself will take four years, and then I have to do my residency, which is three years if I'm understanding everything right."

"Seven years?" James asked, shock in his voice, "Do you think it's really worth it, Steve?"

"I think it is, and for the first time, it's something that I'm genuinely interested in. Something that I truly want. All I've ever wanted in my life is to be able to help. During the war that was being a soldier. Now, it can be a lot of other things, and as someone who spent the greater portion of his life sick, I want to be able to give back."

James was paused in his response, so I stepped in with, "Well, Steve, it seems like you have everything in hand. I'm really proud of you for doing this, and I think you'll make a great doctor."

Steve grinned and said, "I'm actually really excited. School was never fun for me growing up, so I'm looking forward to an opportunity to change some of that story for me."

"Steve?" James asked before I could reply.

"Yeah, Buck?"

"If you become a doctor, will you be able to help me?" he asked, voice unusually quiet.

"I don't know, Buck. I figure I'd be able to help you in some ways, but once I pick my specialization, there is a chance that I might not be as much help as you need," Steve replied, voice understanding.

James paused to think that over and then asked, "But you'll know things?"

"I would assume so. What's going on, Buck?"

He sighed deeply and answered, "I don't trust anyone, but I know I need so much work done."

It dawned on me what he was saying. "James? Are you saying you're ready for some of your surgeries?"

He looked back at me and seemed to realize that for himself. "I guess so?" he replied, still unsure.

"So," Steve added, "What I'm gathering is you're ready for surgeries, but you're scared of the doctors?"

"Yeah," he sighed.

Steve nodded and there was a small smile on his face. He continued, "Well, it's a good thing we have plans for all of that. The medical staff and doctors have been on standby ever since you had your first surgery. Tony and all of them have been waiting for a long time for you to be ready. But, they know about your case, and they understand that this might be a long and time-intensive process. What they also know is that Nat and I are going to be in the room with you the whole time, no matter what. They've agreed that's okay, and they are not going to fight us on that. Plus, Bruce and Tony have been working on both a sedative and local anesthetic that would work on enhanced metabolisms. All three of us have them and all three of us need something that will work. Before we worry about any surgeries or anything like that, why don't we first see if they've come up with anything? Because until they do, we're not doing anything."

My mouth opened, but before I could say anything, James asked, "Who said I wanted to be knocked out? I can take the pain."

"I know you can, my love. But we're not HYDRA. We're not going to make you suffer, even if you can take it. If we can't find a solution, we'll make something else work, but let's see how this goes, okay?"

He sighed, not having another argument to make. Steve looked a little upset, so I gave him a look, asking him to give James and me some time.


	34. Chapter 34

After Steve was gone, James looked at me and said, "I really can take it."

"We both know you can, love. That's not the problem. When we treat our own, we treat them with love, respect, and dignity. That means doing as little harm as possible. Tony's been working with some of the top people in the medical and genetic fields to find a solution. If they can't find one, we'll just keep looking. And if we have to, we'll call Thor and see if there's anything that his people can do. We're not planning to give up on you, James."

"Natalia?" he asked.

"Yes, James?"

"I just want my life back."

"I know, my Jamie. And every day you're here and moving forward is a step toward that. But you know this as well as I do: life is good and bad. You want your life back? Well, here it is, good and bad. You've made a ton of progress and you'll continue to improve, but there will always be setbacks. But the one thing you can know for sure is that Steve and I will be with you always, okay?" I explained, voice firm, but loving.

"Okay. Thank you, Natalia."

"Always, my James. Now, why don't we drag future Dr. Rogers out of his cave and watch a movie," I suggested.

James let out an almost subvocal groan and when I looked down, his face was flushed. He whispered, "We're going to have so much fun with that."

"James!" I exclaimed, fake scandalized.

"Oh, can it, Natalia. You had the same thought. He's going to look sexy as fuck in scrubs and a white coat, and I bet, if we begged him just right, he'd be willing to do a little dressing up for us."

Unbidden, an image of Steve wearing a doctor's coat and nothing else popped into my head. I could feel my face heating up, and James chuckled. "Jesus Christ, James," I whispered.

"I know right? And I know he's not planning for nursing, but if we planned it right, he might be willing to dress up as a candy striper," he whispered, voice low.

"Fuck, James. How am I supposed to look at Steve?"

"Like you always have. I always had a thing for the Army nurses," he practically purred.

"Jamie?"

"Yeah?" he answered.

"Do you think you're ready to join Steve and me?"

"Oh, not by a long shot, but I can still have the images in my head. I don't know if you noticed, but my dick is not at this party right now. I don't know how long it's going to take for me to be able to get it up, but it's not now," he explained, voice softening.

"Alright, James. That's okay. Even if you can't get it up, would you be interested in watching?" I asked.

"That's alright. If I'm going to be there, I'd like it to be as a participant."

I nodded and added, "Do you remember before we showed you the med suite, I said we had people ready to help you begin sorting out your head?"

His eyes immediately closed off, but he nodded slowly. "Don't you think it might be time for you to begin working on that? I mean you've got a long way to go and I think we've done all we can ourselves. A professional might be worth the risk."

He sighed but really seemed to think about it. After a pause that was longer than I would have liked he replied, "Who is it?"

"The same woman that Steve's been speaking with since the new year. Steve loves her, and I think that she might have the potential to be a great help to you."


	35. Chapter 35

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I bombarded you with SO many chapters posted at once. I wanted to get to this one because for the first time you'll get Bucky's POV!!! I'm really excited about this.

**Bucky POV**

Recovery was weird. For seventy-five years all I knew was pain, death, torture, and cold. I was beginning to learn again about comfort, life, peace, and warmth and I was beginning to notice the changes. After some of the memories came back of my life before the war and HYDRA, I began to notice the joining of my self. Sure, I was still Bucky, just like Steve was still Stevie, but I was also The Winter Soldier, just like Steve was Captain America, or he used to be. It started slowly, The Winter Soldier is the one who was out. He established a perimeter around the house and the property. He made sure the doors and windows were completely secure. He set himself up a corner that was easily defended so he might get a moment of rest. He watched and waited for something to change. His eyes never missed a detail. He ignored his body's calls for pain management and rest. He was to remain vigilant. But, somewhere, deep within, I was beginning to come alive. It wasn't with fire and fury, as one might have expected, but with a slow, deathly slow, peeking. As the weeks passed after his initial arrival, The Winter Soldier deemed his environment satisfactory. Me on the other hand, I was still unsure. I was still peeking out, pace agonizingly slow.

But then, Natalia had arrived home with those two stupid puppies, and with, "He's the one who has Kilo's back when he needs it," I could assert myself. Not so strongly, but strong enough that memories began to return. Memories of the life that I'd had with Stevie. Whispers of a clandestine and horribly tragic romance I'd shared with Natalia. A realization that my life was back to being my own again, not owned by the military, HYDRA, or anyone. And then, the pain. Oh, the pain. It was enough to bring me to my knees. My body felt like it was on fire. Every nerve ending was working in overtime, lighting me up with enough pain to cause me to shudder and shiver with the sensation. Everything ached. My feet felt like I'd been walking for months without a break. My knees felt completely and utterly destroyed. My hips didn't feel as bad, but I knew they were in need of help. Every vertebra of my spine felt out of place. My right arm was a constant annoyance, never being able to really function because of my shoulder and elbow. Both were constantly firing pain, overcompensating for the left one, which was its own horror show of pain, fire, and ice. The arm was a marvel of science, biology, and many other fields, but for me, the only thing that registered was the constant pain. It was deep. From the tips of the fingers to the join of metal and flesh, I ached. But, as with most things, Steve and Natalia were there and did what needed to be done.

After getting the arm removed, I felt better. The ache was less, but still a lot. The Winter Soldier had been poking and prodding at the things that were happening around him, waiting for the moment when he could strike again. But, he hadn't really had one. Both of the people he was now living with, while threats in their own ways, were gentle with him and never showed him any hatred or disrespect. They respected his boundaries and let him come to them. I continued to grow and remember and The Winter Soldier continued to watch carefully. They continued to join and fuse as time passed, learning to coexist within the body of James Buchanan Barnes. But when Natalia suggested therapy, The Winter Soldier froze. I could feel it within myself. He could feel the anticipation. I filed that away for future exploration, but I said to Natalia, "I'll think about it, okay?"

"Of course, my love. Whenever you're ready, we'll be here."

I nodded and felt the whirring of The Winter Soldier's gears in my head. I knew about therapy. I knew about the ways it had changed since the 1940s and it settled something deep inside me that there was an option out there for me. But The Soldier was desperate to protect himself and me, by default, and sharing his secrets was a surefire way to lose that protection. As his gears continued to whirr, I thought about that option myself. Over the last nine months, I learned a lot. I learned things about this new time I found myself in, one of which was that while there was still a lot of stigma and judgment around the health of one's mind, it was less so. It wasn't a shame to need support. I'd noticed the changes that were coming out around men and the idea of masculinity. One thing I had known from a young age, and through all of my struggles was that showing your emotions was not a weakness. It was a deep and abiding strength. I'd learned it from people like my mother, Stevie's mother, and other amazing people. I knew that showing my emotions was an opportunity to open myself up to healing. So, I knew that I needed to speak with Stevie about this woman.


	36. Chapter 36

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been a while. Hope you enjoy!

After I spoke with Natalia about therapy, it was time for me to speak with Stevie about it and get the name of the woman he was seeing. I asked, "FRIDAY, where did Steve go?"

"Steve is currently in his office. Is there something I can do for you, James?"

"No, but thank you, FRIDAY. I need to talk to him," I replied.

I headed up to his office and knocked on the door, listening for a, "Come in." I got one, and when I entered the room, I was surprised. I hadn't really seen this room because I didn't really have a reason to. But it surprised me because it wasn't what I was expecting. I had expected dark, rich everything, but it seemed to be a simple, calm space for Steve to have as his own. Steve was sitting at his desk, ensconced in his computer and a few sheets of paper here and there. He was watching me, so I asked, "Whatcha doing?"

He smiled and said, "Continuing my research for school. Looking for the name of the Admissions person so I can reach out. What's up, Bucky?"

I smiled and said, "Natalia told me you had a number of someone I can talk to. Can you give me her info?"

I watched as Steve's jaw fell open a little. He continued to stare at me for a few moments, before he came back to himself and said, "Of course, Bucky. Are you sure?"

I nodded, not really having the words to say what was on my mind. He stood up and pulled out a folder. He passed it over with a smile and said, "This is everything that FRIDAY could find about Dr. Miller. Look it over and I will call her right now. I told her about you when we initially spoke, so she's expecting you. When her secretary answers the phone when you call, tell her you're Steve's friend, and she'll transfer you over, okay?"

Again, I just nodded, stunned at the amount of work that had been put into making me feel comfortable. I did also notice that The Winter Soldier calmed down a little bit, knowing that there wasn't a burden on him to find out any of this information. I muttered a thank you and made my way out and into my own room. I set the folder down on the bed and began to search through it. Everything I found there was encouraging, not only to me but to The Winter Soldier. It explained everything I needed to know about who she is, along with providing me with some of Steve's impressions of her, which I trusted more than I did the information that FRIDAY gave them.

It took me longer than I would have liked, but I went through the whole folder and it dawned on me that I had already made my decision. There was now only one problem; I didn't have a phone. When I had moved in, I wasn't given one, because it might have been overwhelming, but now I didn't really feel the need to have one. I asked FRIDAY, "Can you find a way to get me a phone?"

"Sure. I'm going to let Natasha know you need one and she'll be right there."

I gave her my agreement and a minute later, Natalia knocked on the door and I allowed her in and she passed me a very high tech-looking phone, along with a large tablet and a laptop. She placed them all on the bed and said, "We've been waiting for you to ask for this. All totally secure, connected to FRIDAY, and totally untraceable. Nothing will lead anyone to you through this. You can do as many checks as you need to, okay?"

I nodded, staring at the tech in front of me. She left the room, and I pulled out the phone, turning it on and beginning to go through its opening protocols. It took about half an hour, but once the phone was set up to my liking, I called the number from the file and listened to the ringing on the other end. Four rings in, a voice answered with, "Dr. Miller's office, how can I help you?"

"Oh, um, I was calling to speak with Dr. Miller. I was told to say that I'm Steve's friend."

"Oh! Let me transfer you over, okay?" the woman asked.

"Of course. Thank you."

"No worries." I heard the phone switch to a short bit of music and then there were more ringing tones.

"This is Dr. Miller," a new voice said, this one lower than the previous one, and laced with a no-nonsense tone that immediately put me at ease.

"Um, yeah, this is Steve's friend?" I asked.

"Ah. And does Steve's friend have a name?" she asked, voice not changing.

"Uhhhhh..." I paused, unsure for one second, but then said, "It's James Buchanan Barnes?"

"Okay. Is there something you want me to call you?" she asked, and I could hear the smile in her voice.

"Oh, um I guess you can call me Bucky," I answered, caught off guard by her unusual questions.

"Well, it's nice to meet you, Bucky. How can I help you today?"

I was completely stunned. Steve had told me that Dr. Miller knew about me. Why was she asking me that? I could feel my thoughts rolling through my head and before I could censor, I blurted, "Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why are you being so nice to me?" I asked.

"Why wouldn't I be?" she replied.

"Steve told me he told you about me. So you know who I am. Why are you being so nice to me?"

She chuckled on the other end of the line and replied, "Because I really don't know you, Bucky. I know who Steve sees you as, and I know about some of the things you've been through from Steve's perspective, but I don't actually know you. One thing I came to an agreement with Steve on was that he could talk about you and I would help him with his own problems when it came to you, but I would not give him advice on how to help you. You needed to come to me or someone else when you were ready, not when Steve was."

Again, a stunned silence fell over me. My heart was racing and I felt a little overwhelmed. I felt like I was speechless and there weren't words to describe what I was feeling. "Bucky?" she asked.

"Yeah," I rasped.

"You still with me?"

"I don't know," I whispered.

"Okay. Why don't you tell me what you can see where you are?" she asked, voice still cool as a cucumber.

"My bed. Black blanket. Tan walls. Wooden furniture. White door. Light carpet. Bathroom sink. Bed frame. Photos on the wall."

There was another beat of silence before she asked, "Feel a little better?"

I paused and when I thought about it, I did feel better. I felt better about this situation and I overall felt calmer. I answered, "Yeah. Thanks."

"That's my job."

"So, you don't know what I did?" I asked.

"I know what Steve has told me. But I want to get to know you through you, not through what Steve tells me. I want us to have our own relationship, not based on Steve or anyone else."

Again, I paused, not used to this from people, but I took a breath and said, "Thank you."

"No worries, Bucky. Now, what can I do for you?"

"I don't know."

"Well, I'm sure we can find some things to work on. Are you having any immediate problems?" she asked, voice still kind.

"I'm constantly in pain. But I need surgeries and physical therapy to help with that and I can't deal with that now."

"What's stopping you from surgery and the other things you need to help your pain?" she inquired.

"What do you know about what was done to me?" I asked, voice devoid of emotion.

"Only what Steve's told me, which isn't much."

I paused for a moment, thinking about what I wanted to tell her. The Winter Soldier was pressing in my mind, telling me not to tell her anything. But, I knew she would help. So I forged on with, "HYDRA didn't care about my pain. Anything that I needed to have done, they'd do, but I didn't get any pain killers or anything. Plus, they only declared grievous injury worthy of their time, so I have more improperly healed injuries than I do properly healed ones. I know I have a high pain tolerance. But I also know that if I were to have any procedures done, I might lash out. Plus, anesthetics and local numbing agents go right through me. Steve says he has people working on a solution for that, but I'm still scared."

"Well, Bucky. That sounds like quite a lot. How about we break it down and come up with an action plan. Do you know any of the people involved in your care?" she asked, voice not even changed slightly.

I paused, again, realizing that I didn't know any of the people who were going to be taking up my care. I replied, "No, I don't."

"Well then, I think that might be a good first step. Meet with the people who have been working on your care, and try and explain some of these things to them and see what can be done."

Again, I paused, thinking over her suggestion and realizing it was a good idea. A small smile made its way to my face and I replied, "Okay. Do you think you could help me? When I talk to them, I mean?"

"Of course, Bucky," she answered, "I'd be happy to help in any way I can. When you have a meeting scheduled, text me and I will clear my schedule. Would you like me there in person, or is it okay for me to just be there on the phone or through video conference?"

My mind was overwhelmed, but I answered, "I think I'd be okay with you just being there via phone or video call. But I'm not sure. I still need to talk to Steve and Natalia so that we can schedule a time to go up to New York because that's where all of the doctors are. They are happy to come down to the house to do the surgeries, but I'm okay with going to New York to see them."

"Well, then, that's what we'll do. I'm going to give you my cell number so you can call me any time, okay Bucky? Any time you need me, you call, and when you have a time set for your meeting with the people in charge of your care, you let me know and I'll be there to help."

"Okay. Um, thanks. Dr. Miller?"

"Yes, Bucky?" she replied.

"Do you think I'll ever be like I was?" I asked, voice quiet.

"You'll never be who you were, Bucky. But that doesn't mean you can't be happy. You will never be the person Steve knew ever again. That man fell from a train. But you can be someone again. With Steve's help and mine, you can be happy and feel like yourself again. Do you mind me asking who Natalia is?"

"Steve hasn't told you?" I asked.

"Steve's told me about someone named Natasha and who she is to him, but I want to hear who Natalia is," she clarified.

"I'm not sure. We met when we were both in dark places and she was the light that helped me find my way for a while. But HYDRA made me forget her. We were in a relationship for a while and I still love her deeply. Almost as much as I love Steve. She changed her name at some point from Natalia to Natasha."

"Okay. Well, I'm happy to hear that Steve and Natalia are treating you well. Is there anything else I can do for you, Bucky?"

"I think that's all for now."

"Alright, why don't we get an appointment on the books for next week and we can see what more we can work on before your surgeries and such."

I agreed and we scheduled an appointment. It seemed that things were looking up and I had a lot to discuss with Steve and Natalia. I knew they both were going to be weird about it, but I didn't know what else to do.


	37. Chapter 37

It took way less time than I thought, and a week and a half later, we were making the trek up to New York to see the people in charge of my care. Steve had shown me files on all of them so I knew what I was walking into. That helped calm my nerves about the whole situation, and Dr. Miller was ready to support me, which also helped calm me down. I was intrigued to meet both Mr. Stark and Dr. Banner, who Steve and Natalia both spoke highly of. They were both also Avengers, so I was intrigued to see how things would shake out. Clint had been in touch, saying he was at the tower for SHIELD related business, so I felt better knowing that there would be another familiar face present. Steve and Natalia both spoke highly of all the people in charge of my care, but I was still nervous about meeting them.

Pulling into Stark Tower was a bit of a shock. I was still highly out of it when we left the last time, so I didn't really notice the building, but this time, I was fully aware and the building was a marvel. We pulled into the garage and approached the door, where a shorter man with a trimmed goatee was waiting for us. Once we made it inside, Steve and Natalia both hugged him and introduced him to me as Tony Stark. Steve reminded me he was Howard Stark's son, and I held out my hand for him to shake. He did so and I said, "It's nice to meet you, Mr. Stark."

"It's Tony, Manchurian Candidate. Mr. Stark was my old man and I am certainly not him."

I looked at Steve, trying to decide what to say. Steve just smiled and we moved further into the tower. Tony followed us up to where Steve and Natalia had stayed the last time they'd been at the tower, and we settled on the couch in the living room, while Steve and Natalia got everything put away. Tony was watching me with keen eyes and my skin was beginning to crawl. Before I could say anything there was a ding and the elevator opened to reveal Clint. I smiled at the man and he returned it. He passed hugs around to us all and Tony seemed to be a little surprised at that. Clint sat down next to me and told Tony, "Quit staring at him, Stark. He might be the Winter Soldier, but he's also James Barnes. Cut it out."

Tony had the decency to look sort of abashed but still didn't move from staring at me. Clint then whacked him on the back of the head and that finally moved Tony's eyes from me. Steve and Natalia came in and settled on the couch. Tony looked at the two of them and said, "Did you have a plan?"

"Not really, Tony. It's all up to how James wants to do this," Natalia explained.

He looked at me and asked, "So, any idea how you want to do this?"

I looked over to Steve and Natalia and both of them smiled at me in an encouraging way. I replied, "I'm not sure. I need to meet all of these people, but I don't want to get overwhelmed or make them nervous."

"Well, they already know who you are, so I don't think that's a problem."

I paused, thinking about how I wanted to do this. I knew my priorities, so I decided to make them known, "I want to see someone about my mouth and then my arm. The rest doesn't matter."

"Excellent. We'll get all the appropriate people here and we can meet with them tomorrow," Tony replied.

I nodded and got up, needing to get away from everyone. I escaped down the hall, following the lights that were guiding my way. I pulled out my phone and called Dr. Miller.

She answered with, "Hey, Bucky."

"Sorry to bother you, Dr. Miller. I'm just feeling a bit overwhelmed."

"That's fine, Bucky. I told you to call me whenever you needed me, and I meant it. What's got you feeling so overwhelmed?" she asked.

"I'm at Stark Tower."

"Mm. Yeah, that sounds like enough. Is there anything I can do right now?" she asked, trying to suss out what was wrong.

"I don't know. Tony won't stop looking at me, and I can't seem to find my words."

"Alright. How about this; you don't need to talk if you don't want to. No one should force you to talk. As for Tony, let me talk to him," she requested.

"Alright. Are you sure?" I asked.

"Yeah. I think I need to speak with him not only for you but for me. Put him on the line."

I headed back out to the living room the find the four of them making quiet conversation. I approached Tony and passed him the phone. He took it and answered, "Hello?"

Instantly, his posture shifted from casual to serious. His face seemed to pale and he was listening to Dr. Miller. After about five minutes he passed me the phone and abruptly left the room. I put the phone to my ear and asked, "What did you do?"

"Reminded him of what happened to him and how he acted. You'll be fine. I'll speak with you tomorrow, Bucky."

"Alright," I replied and hung up.

Natalia was staring at me and asked, "All good?"

"Yeah. Just overwhelmed."

"That's to be expected with Tony," she explained.

I nodded and flopped back down on the couch. We moved on to other topics of conversation and my brain finally calmed down and sort of caught up to me. I felt better and I knew everything would work out.


	38. Chapter 38

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm including a list of all of the people involved in Bucky's care at the end of the chap. Enjoy!

The following morning was filled with nerves. Steve forced me to eat something, but if I had my way, I wouldn't have. Once breakfast was taken care of, we made our way down to a conference room. We walked in and Tony was sitting there along with Clint, a mild-mannered looking man in glasses, and five women, all of whom looked like they meant business, while also appearing to be really non-threatening. Steve, Natalia, and I settled into the three remaining chairs, and I pulled out my phone to text Dr. Miller: _Meeting about to start. Video or phone call?_

Seconds later, my phone began to ring with a video call, but before I could answer it, Dr. Miller's face appeared on one of the windows at the head of the room, so Dr. Miller could see everyone. She began with, "Hi, James. Thanks for calling me. And hello to everyone else. My name is Dr. Miller and I am here because as James's primary mental health advisor and counselor, he asked me to be. I will remind all of you that I am here with James's best interest at heart and I will argue anything I don't feel is in his best interest."

Everyone looked around and I instantly relaxed. I knew Steve and Natalia were with me, but these people were friends of theirs. With Dr. Miller, I knew she was with me no matter what. I looked around the room and I stopped at the mild-mannered looking man with the glasses. I asked, "Who are you?"

He smiled and said, "Dr. Bruce Banner. While not specifically a medical doctor, I know enhanced physiologies and was brought in to consult on the issue of anesthesia and general help. I'm an Avenger as well."

I paused and then nodded thanking him for his honesty. I looked to Dr. Miller, not knowing what to do next. She smiled and asked, "Why don't all of the doctors in the room introduce themselves to James, myself, Natasha, and Steve. Include what you do as well."

It started with a woman who looked unusually calm for being in a room with all of these people. She spoke with, "Hi. I'm Dr. Samantha Gray. I'm a physician and Mr. Stark brought me in to serve as James's general physician. I'm going to be running a regular physical on you, James, before we worry about anything else."

I nodded and the next woman kept glancing all over the room as if trying to take it all in at once, "Hello. Um, I'm Dr. Marie Nelson. I'm a dentist and dental surgeon. I'm here to take a look at James's mouth and begin working on a set of dentures."

I rankled at the word dentures and before the next person could speak, Dr. Miller interrupted with, "Dr. Nelson, do these dentures have to be the option?"

"For now, I think they're the best option. They don't have to be the only option forever, but until we get the rest of James back, I think it might be best. Dental implants can take a long time to get done, and I've been told that James doesn't really want to wait."

Dr. Miller looked to me and asked, "Is that true, James?"

I stared at her and said, "I guess so. I would like to have real teeth, but if dentures are the best option for now, then that's fine."

She nodded and looked back to the dentist with, "Alright. We're going to plan for dentures and at a later date, we're going to look into permanent teeth for him."

Dr. Nelson nodded. The next woman was looking at me with something akin to sadness or pity. She spoke, "My name is Dr. Hannah Marlowe. I'm a neurologist who has been charged with your care, James. I was involved in the removal of your old arm, and am here to work on making sure that your new arm is compatible with your nervous system."

Next to her was a woman who looked about as no-nonsense as they came. Unbidden, an image of Peggy Carter popped into my head. She said, "Dr. Jenna Cooper, and I'm an orthopedic surgeon. I worked with Dr. Marlowe to have your arm removed and will be working with her and Mr. Stark to have your new arm put back on. Additionally, I will be doing all the needed repairs to other parts of your body."

The last doctor to speak looked so calm, it seemed like she was asleep. Her voice was soothing as she spoke, "Hi James. My name is Dr. Madison King. I'm a rheumatologist, which means I work with people's joints, muscles, tendons, and such. I will be working with Dr. Cooper to determine what needs fixing. In addition, I will be helping your physical and massage therapy people come up with a plan that will work for you."

I nodded at all of them, a silent thanks. Dr. Miller said, "Excellent. James asked me to be here because he knows that he needs this help, but he is very anxious about all of this. I'm sure you all know that you will be performing your surgeries and procedures at the home of Steve, Natasha, and James and that Steve and Natasha will be in the room with James no matter what. James, are you feeling better?"

I nodded, not being able to find my voice. Dr. Miller continued, "Dr. Banner, have you made any progress on anesthesia or a local numbing agent?"

Dr. Banner looked a little startled, but answered, "We think so. We haven't had someone to test it on, but if Steve would allow it, we'd love to give it a shot."

"Who's we?" she asked.

"I've been working on this with Mr. Stark and a few other people we know who used to be with SHIELD."

"And who might those people be?" Dr. Miller asked, an eyebrow raised.

"Their names are Dr. Fitz and Dr. Simmons. They work on a team with someone we know. They're some of SHIELD's best, and they have been an enormous help."

She nodded. There was a long, drawn-out silence, and then Dr. Miller spoke up again with, "Alright, well that seems like it's all taken care of. James, does this make you feel ready to begin treatment?"

"Yeah. Thanks."

She smiled and said, "Why don't you go upstairs and we can hash everything out here, alright?"

I nodded and left the room, sighing in relief. This was a big step forward.

\--

**Steve POV**

When Bucky left the room, the energy shifted. Dr. Miller continued to speak with, "Alright, here's the deal. Nothing else is going to be done while James is at the tower. For the next month, I'm going to continue working with James on grounding techniques and other things to help him feel more ready for all of this. After that month is over, Dr. Gray and Dr. Nelson will go to see Steve, Natasha, and James at their home, and will do their assessments of James. Once those are done, they will give their reports to James. Once that is done, he will decide when he wants to have his first dental session. Only when that is decided will anything happen. I don't know how long that will take, but once all of the damage is removed and he is healed up, the dentures will be sent out along with Dr. Nelson again to make sure they fit properly and James knows how to care for them. Then, after another month getting used to his teeth, Dr. Marlowe, Dr. Cooper, and Dr. King, you three will go out for your consultations. Once that is done, we will have another meeting to discuss the needed work, and how to proceed. Does that work for everyone?"

There were stunned looks all around, but everyone seemed to nod. With that agreed upon, Dr. Miller said her goodbyes, and Tony looked at Nat and me and said, "Damn. She is no-nonsense."

"She's military, Stark. What else did you expect?" I asked.

"Alright, that's this meeting adjourned. Steve, come down to the lab with us and we'll see how our stuff works, and then you three can leave," he continued.

I nodded and we all left the room, me following Tony and Bruce. This was going to be interesting, there was no doubt about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dr. Gray general physician  
Dr. Nelson dental  
Dr. Marlowe neurosurgeon  
Dr. Cooper orthopedic surgeon  
Dr. King rheumatologist  
Dr. Moore physical therapist  
Dr. Miller psychiatrist/therapist  
Stark for arm care  
Bruce for enhanced and specialized care


	39. Chapter 39

**Bucky POV**

A month after the meeting at Stark Tower, and Dr. Gray and Dr. Nelson were on their way. Tony and Bruce had determined, based on testing Steve, that they had something workable for an anesthetic. I was a jumble of nerves, but Natalia was sitting with me in the physical therapy suite trying to keep me calm. Dr. Miller had been working with me to help me remain grounded and calm, and I was trying every trick in the book. Before I got too nervous, Dr. Gray came in, along with Steve. Natalia left the room to keep an eye on Dr. Nelson. The tension was thick, but we all knew the stakes were high. She began by saying, "Dr. Banner and Mr. Stark have informed me that a lot of these tests are probably unnecessary due to your enhancements, but I would like to run all of them anyway. Is that okay with you?"

I nodded, not being able to find my voice. She continued, "I've already seen your x-rays, which were taken when your arm was removed. Nothing stands out to me, but that's why you have specialists. I'm sure they will see things that I didn't. I'm going to begin by taking some blood from you. Captain Rogers, I'm told you have a lab here?"

"It's just Steve," he answered, "And yes, we do have a lab here. Once you take your samples and finish the exam, I'll show you."

She nodded and turned back to me and continued, "So, I'm going to get this needle inserted and we'll begin the blood draw. Good with you?"

I nodded again. She pulled out a bag with a tube and a needle attached. She asked me to hold out my arm and she wrapped my bicep with a rubber tie and then inserted the needle at my elbow. She removed the strap once the needle was in and I watched as the blood flowed out of me and into the bag. Once it was about half full, she pulled the needle and pressed a small cotton ball over the prick. She then spoke up with, "I'm going to have you lay down for this exam. Is that okay, James?"

I nodded, again, still not having words, or really feeling like talking. I laid down on the bed and she stood at the top of my head and began moving her hands over my head. I tensed, but the sensation of her hands on my head felt kind of good, and so I slowly relaxed. She pressed her hands down my neck and continued to move through my whole body, pressing and tapping where she needed to and asking me questions as she went. She finished by listening to my heart, lungs, and stomach, and then checking my eyes and ears. She stepped back and said, "There are things that are definitely concerning here, James, but I'm going to send those thoughts to your other doctors so they know what I've found. I'm going to run your blood and see what I find, but based on what Stark and Banner told me, I'm not going to find anything, so I think I'm done here."

I nodded in thanks, and she left the room with Steve. I hauled myself back up to sitting with Steve's help before he left, and I made my way into the dental suite where Dr. Nelson was waiting. FRIDAY had taken some scans of my mouth, so Dr. Nelson was looking over those. Natalia helped me settle down into the chair and Dr. Nelson watched me for a moment before saying, "So, I've been looking at these scans, and while helpful, I like to base my recommendations on what I see, not on what someone tells me. So, I just need you to lay back for me, and open your mouth."

I did as asked but before she did anything, a large light made its way over me and shined right into my eyes. I winced at the light and Natalia passed me a pair of sunglasses. She said, "Wear them. Won't hurt your eyes as much."

I nodded and instantly put them on my head and felt better. The light wasn't as harsh and everything felt a little better. Dr. Nelson began her examination and I noticed instantly that she was concerned. Her eyebrows furrowed and she made certain noises that gave her away. The exam took longer than I would have liked, but all in all, it only lasted about fifteen minutes. She pulled away from me and moved the light so I could remove the glasses. I shifted for a moment and then she began to speak, "Well, I've seen a lot of bad cases in my time, James, but I think yours might be the worst. My recommendation is to remove all of the damaged teeth as soon as possible, allow that to heal, and then do another exam to check and see if anything has improved. I'm having a hard time telling what's going on in there because some of the damage is so extensive."

I nodded and looked to Natalia. She looked back and asked, "What do you want to do?"

"I think I'd like to go with what Dr. Nelson suggested. But, can we wait until tomorrow?"

Dr. Nelson answered, "Of course."

I nodded and thanked Dr. Nelson and then got up and left the building. I needed some time to think. Everything was going to work out fine, but I knew this was going to be trying. I wanted to call Dr. Miller, but I'd taken so much of her time and I felt terrible about it. I decided to go and see Voin in order to help me calm down and get everything under control. 

\--

The following morning, I wasn't any less nervous, but I felt more settled. Dr. Nelson had stayed the night and she had asked if it was okay if a nurse from her practice joined her. I agreed and someone was going to be brought in to help. When I walked into the suite, calming music was playing and I noticed the scent of cedar around the room. I felt a little more relaxed and settled into the dental chair. Natalia and Steve were there and Dr. Gray had stayed to keep her eyes on me while I was under. She inserted the needle on the IV with expert hands and soon I felt the effects, and after about five minutes I was out.

\--

**Natasha POV**

Once James was out, Dr. Nelson and her assistant got to work. They opened up James's mouth and held it open with a special implement. Steve and I were holding hands, trying not to freak out. They worked quickly and quite methodically, removing tooth after tooth and sewing up each cavity as they went. All told they removed about 20 teeth, and all of them looked horrifying. Some of them weren't even full teeth, which was even more upsetting. Some of them were so riddled with cavities that it looked like something right out of a science fiction movie. The entire surgery took only about two hours though, and as soon as the last stitches were tied off, Dr. Gray removed the IV and the three of them left the room and were going to be leaving our property. Fifteen minutes later, James's eyes began fluttering and his eyes flew open.

He looked at Steve and I and Steve passed him a small glass of water. He sipped it quickly, and when he tried to speak, nothing came out. I said, "Don't speak, Yasha. It's okay. Dr. Nelson is going to come back in two days to check you out and see how you're doing. If she needs to do any more work, we'll talk about it then. Based on scans, FRIDAY has everything she needs to make dentures for you. So once Dr. Nelson is okay with it, she'll get going on making you a set based on what you need, and everything will be okay."

He nodded and relaxed.

\--

**James POV**

Two days later and I felt much better, but still off because I was missing so many teeth. Natalia assured me everything was normal and when Dr. Nelson returned to check me out, she determined that everything was okay, but I would need to be assiduous about the care that I took with my mouth. I agreed to be careful and she gave me detailed care instructions for my mouth and my new dentures. She recommended some adhesives that would help them stick to my gums and explained everything I needed to know. Once she left, I breathed a sigh of relief, and Natalia brought me back to the house where FRIDAY did another scan of my mouth and got to work on my new teeth. Steve took the list that Dr. Nelson had given me of adhesives and headed out to pick them up.

By the end of the day, I had a working pair of dentures. I wasn't planning to put them in, but I was looking forward to tomorrow and trying them out. I was most looking forward to being able to eat anything I wanted. I'd missed a lot of foods because my mouth was so sensitive and after removing all those teeth I was on liquids only and that was terrible.

The following morning I was up before everyone else, and I grinned at the chance to surprise them. Since I'd moved in, I'd been talking, but a lot of it had been short sentences and very quietly because of the pain. With my new teeth and post-surgery, it didn't hurt anymore generally, and I could speak without pain. I got everything I needed and glued in the new sets of dentures. Once the glue was set, I smiled at myself in the mirror and couldn't get enough. Once I cleaned up, I went into the kitchen and started breakfast. As I made it, Steve and Natalia wandered in and I couldn't help but grin like a lunatic. They both grinned back and immediately noticed. I was babbling a mile a minute, not really knowing what I was talking about, but relishing in the ability to speak without pain. 


	40. Chapter 40

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a filler here, but I love this chapter. <3

**Steve POV**

After Bucky's mouth was back to somewhat normal, it seemed like he opened up. It made sense, sort of, because his mouth wasn't in pain constantly and he could function and eat better. While he was recovering from that, I had started on my classes, all of which were online, which I was grateful for. I didn't have to go anywhere and I didn't have to worry about being seen or recognized. I knew I would have to go to campus for med school, but that was a bridge we'd cross when we got there. I could tell Nat was beginning to get a little bored and I could see it rankling her. She hid it well, but I was beginning to see past her defenses. I had begun doing some research and asked FRIDAY to compile a packet for her. She did so, not complaining in the least.

Overlapping the time when we first found Bucky, around Thanksgiving-ish, Nat and I had ordered all of the seed and tree catalogs we could want, along with prepping our first greenhouse, which was built alongside the house. Ever since we moved in, Tony had been sending over monthly packages of food for us until we got the garden underway, because as much as we could eat whatever we wanted, we liked eating healthy and wanted to live off of our own land, because we had plenty of it. Nat was the one really heading up the project and she spent hours perusing seed and tree catalogs, deciding what she wanted to grow in our garden. We'd consulted a lot of help from FRIDAY and the internet, but we were muddling our way through.

One thing I spent a lot of time doing in the early days of Bucky's recovery was clearing land for our garden plot, making sure I was following all of the rules. It was arduous, backbreaking work, even for a super-soldier like me. It was nice, actually, to use my strength for something simple, rather than something as complex as war or espionage. As the new year dawned, Nat began the preparations for beginning our garden. It came in fits and starts because of Bucky's recovery, but she used her time wisely, making sure to take care of everything. Turned out, Nat had a bit of a green thumb.

We put in orders through FRIDAY for all of the various fruits, veggies, herbs, and flowers we wanted and soon we were inundated with constant deliveries of not only seeds but small seedlings and other baby plants. We used a lot of the time that Bucky was recovering and spending time with Voin in order to continue prepping the garden. When the Bartons came over, we used their help to start some of the seeds in the greenhouse, along with preparing for March, when the major seeding would begin. It was super helpful to have the extra hands around and even Bucky, whose one arm made it quite complicated for him to help, got involved. As the time passed and Bucky was finished with his mouth surgery and his arm consult was on the horizon, the garden was growing more and more every day and while Buck was getting used to his new mouth and preparing for his arm, Nat and I were taking care of the garden.

The other thing we'd been thinking about was the breeds of chicken, cows, sheep, goats, and ducks we wanted to raise. We talked for a long time about what was important to us, and we reached some agreements. The one thing we quickly agreed upon was that we wanted to raise endangered breeds. We realized that so many of these beautiful animals were dying out, and even though we might kill a few of them to eat, we wanted to be part of the solution. We did agree to wait until after Bucky's arm surgery to do anything else, but we felt great about having agreed to the breeds and animals we wanted. We were also looking into raising bees and fish, but that was going to take some time, so we were willing to wait. 


	41. Chapter 41

**Bucky POV**

One month with my new teeth and the world was looking great. I loved being able to eat whatever I wanted, and I began rapidly putting on weight because I could finally enjoy food. Before my teeth, I ate because I had to, but it was painful and difficult, so I was quite underweight for someone of my size, along with the demands the serum placed on me. When I could finally enjoy food, I dug in with wild abandon and probably ate enough for a few people. But I was never hungry and that's all that mattered to me. In the time between getting my teeth and the consultations for my arm, I'd been talking with Dr. Miller frequently, continuing to talk about everything that had happened to me that I remembered, along with preparing myself for the other surgeries I might need. I was also helping Natalia and Steve with some of the garden work. It was relaxing for me, like spending time with Voin was. I loved working in the greenhouse, and watching the little plants come to life from seeds was a rare and wonderful experience. While my one arm made it difficult, I tried my best. It made me want my new arm in a way that I hadn't before. I mean, once I got my teeth I knew the arm would be a welcome addition, but being able to work in the garden was the thing that brought me the most excitement.

Finally, my consultations rolled around and Dr's Marlowe, Cooper, and King all came out. They planned to stay for a week, hoping to get the arm on at that time too. The appointments all began in the physical therapy room, and the whole first day was dedicated to poking, prodding, testing, and re-testing. It was exhausting even though I didn't have to do anything but sit there and do as I was told. But, I pushed through, knowing that the results would be highly worth it. The second day was focused on the procedure itself and how it would play out. Tony conferenced in then, adding his two cents based on the design of the arm. He was planning to come out the following morning in order to help prep the suite for surgery, along with showing me the new arm he had made. He'd shown it to me when we were at the tower, but there were a few changes I wanted to be made, namely that it was not a weapon. It took forever to convince him that I didn't need a weapon, but once Steve, Natalia, Bruce, and Clint all ganged-up on him, he couldn't argue. I also asked that the arm be completely detachable. While it would be nice to have a second arm, I knew that sometimes I wouldn't want to wear it, like when I was sleeping. Plus, depending on how heavy the arm was, I would need to be able to take it off to give my body time to heal.

When Tony arrived on the third day, it was with shockingly little fanfare. I hadn't known Tony long, but I'd already gathered that he was not what people thought he was. He carried with him a large case that held the arm. With Tony came several nurses to help my doctors with the surgery. They were all wonderful and I was grateful they were so willing to help me. Tony and I settled into the living room with Natalia and Steve, while the doctors and nurses prepped the suite. As soon as Tony was done explaining to us, I was going to be put under so they could install the structure and support I would need. But first, Tony opened up the case and my jaw nearly fell off my head. It seemed like I was looking at a regular old arm that someone had just put into a case. Steve and Natalia looked just as shocked. We all stared at Tony and he had a triumphant grin on his face. He said, "Second skin. A full sleeve and glove that will make your arm look like any normal arm. Completely removable, so when you're at home or with us you don't need to wear it. Machine washable, so if something happens, you can clean it. Plus, it won't interfere with some of the features I've put in place."

The three of us were all completely in shock, and we hadn't even seen the arm itself yet. While we continued to sit in shocked silence, Tony pulled the arm out of the case and gently removed the cover to reveal a sleek, matte grey arm. It looked like something right out of a science fiction novel, but then again, mine and Steve's lives were a science fiction novel, so it fits. I watched him watch us and a grin spread over my face without my permission. He grinned back and said, "So, you ready to review features?"

I looked over at Steve and Natalia, and both of them had looks on their faces that didn't really have names. I grinned at them and they grinned back and I turned to Tony and said, "Yes. Let's hear it."

"Alright, the main feature is that it is just about equal in weight to your other arm. I couldn't get it exact, but it should make your life a lot easier now. There are pressure sensors all throughout, so if the docs wire you up right, you should be able to have sensation in this arm and hand. It's not going to be anything like the right, but it will be there. I've arranged it so if you hold your hand in certain ways, the entire arm will open up and you can do repairs, rather than having to come to me. Also, there is a button you can press when you're not wearing it to do the same. Maybe tomorrow, while you're recovering, I'll show you the ins and outs. I'm told you used to be quite the gear-head, so I'll explain everything and how you can make any changes you want."

I nodded slowly, not knowing how to process everything. There were a lot of things flying through my head. I began to float away in my shock and when I felt something at my knee, I came out of it and saw Alpha's head on my knee. I smiled at the pup and said, "Tony, you have no idea with this means."

"I think I do, Sarge. While your story and mine aren't remotely similar, I know how much I wished someone had been there for me like this when I got back from that cave. I probably wouldn't have accepted it, so you're way ahead of me there, but having someone be there for me would have been nice. So I'm just paying it forward."

I nodded, not having words. Steve and Natalia were similarly as shocked. We all just allowed the quiet to reign, before we all got up and made our way to the med suite. The surgery suite was the one room that confused me. It looked like any normal bedroom, and I was genuinely concerned about how this was all going to shake out. But, I just decided to go with it. I stripped off my shirt while Natalia turned down the bed. I handed my shirt off to Steve and climbed in. She covered me up to my waist and Dr. Gray, who'd flown in with the nurses, got the IV line in with the anesthesia. Pretty soon, I was out like a light.


	42. Chapter 42

**Natasha POV**

Once James was completely asleep, the doctors and nurses got to work. A bunch of equipment was wheeled in from an adjacent room, and everything got going. Steve pressed the button on the bed in order to harden it, and Tony and I settled James into the bed more. This surgery was focused on the front of his shoulder, and once this was done, we'd flip him over and put anchors in on the back of his shoulder. In addition, sensors were being installed that would connect with the arm to simulate nerve stimulus. Each sensor was connected to a nerve and it would pass the signal from the nerve to the arm. A specially designed plate was also being installed for easy install and removal of the arm.

The surgery took about eight hours all told, and about four hours in, Steve, Tony, and I had to flip James onto his stomach. We made sure his head was facing one way so he could breathe and we were sure not to jostle his IV too much. Once he was settled, they got back to work and we all were feeling better. Tony was hovering just a little bit, but this was his design, so he kind of had the right. As the surgery progressed, I was getting more and more excited about the prospect of what this would mean for James, but also what it would mean for Steve and I. We'd been so focused on him, that it was going to be interesting to begin focusing on us again.

When the last stitch was finally done, we flipped him back over, wrapped his shoulder and new plate with clean and sterile gauze and then Dr. Grey pulled the IV. Everyone except myself and Steve left the room and we waited. This time, it took a little longer for him to come out of it, but we knew that was going to happen because he had been under for longer. But when his eyes finally opened, it was a relief. He snuggled into the bed and snoozed for a little bit while the drug worked its way out of his system. When he was more fully around, he noticed the gauze and I noticed his eyebrows furrow in pain. I passed him over two pain pills and a glass of water, and he took them and that little furrow went away. Steve helped him off the bed and I opened doors and helped them navigate back to the house.

\--

The following morning, the doctors and nurses had all left and only Tony remained. James was not totally back to himself, but he was definitely getting there. He was still a little slower and in pain, but I could tell he was really trying to focus on the good stuff. Throughout the day I could see the frustration, but I knew it would be worth it. Tony spent a lot of time with him going through all of the protocols and things that the arm could do. James's attention was riveted, and the grin on my face was unembarrassed because I knew James was so happy. By the end of the day, James had that spark back in his eye and I knew everything was going to be fine. Steve, James, and I all settled into bed that night and I finally realized that my life was just the way I wanted it. Then, the most unbelievable thing happened. James turned to me and kissed me--hard. I felt my whole body begin to tingle with the passion of his kiss and it slowly dawned on me that James was finally making a move. He pulled back and I was breathless. I flopped back on the bed and James had a rakish grin on his face. I grinned back, still a little stunned at the turn of events. I could feel Steve behind me and he was practically vibrating. James grinned even wider and hopped out of bed and ran to the other side where Steve was laying. I scooted over so James had room and he climbed in next to Steve.

He then latched onto Steve's lips and I felt the tingles in my body increase. I moved closer to Steve and began to kiss down his neck and all over the broad expanse of his back. I could feel each muscle twitch with each kiss and I loved every second of it. Once Steve and James separated, we all fell into a nice snuggle together. Things were looking way up and I think everything was going to be very worth it in the end. I got the feeling that quite soon, mine and Steve's twosome was going to turn into a very definitive and active threesome, and that's all I ever wanted. 


	43. Chapter 43

**Steve POV**

About a week after Bucky's arm surgery, it was finally time to put the arm on. Bucky was standing in the physical therapy suite with no shirt on, which was its own frustration. Tony, who had left and returned, pulled the arm out of the case and showed Nat and me how to install it, in case he needed the help. He put it on and took it off a few times, but after the third time on, he left it alone and Bucky could finally move freely. The grin on his face was blinding and he ran to me and hugged me, hard. I embraced him just as fiercely, and I could feel the tears flowing from his eyes. I whispered, "I love you, Bucky Barnes."

"I love you too, Steven Grant Rogers. More than life itself."

My eyes teared up at the declaration and we parted ways and Bucky went to Nat to give her a hug. They held onto each other for a few minutes and I couldn't wipe the grin off my face, even if my life depended on it. When they pulled back, Tony gave some last instructions and then made his way to the quinjet to head back to New York. We promised a visit soon, and he was happy to leave us in peace. We were all grinning like morons and when we finally got to the house, we fell onto the couch together.

The last month or so had been exhausting, so we all took naps that afternoon. When we all woke up, Bucky went to his room to read for a while and I decided now was a good time to speak with Nat. She was leaning up against me and I said, "I know you like this life we have, Nat, but I can see it rubbing you the wrong way."

"I'm fine, Steve," she insisted.

"No, you're not, Nat. And that's okay. Before Bucky got his arm and stuff, I had FRIDAY make a packet for you," I argued and handed over the packet FRIDAY made.

She flipped through it and she went very still and quiet. She closed the folder and turned to look at me and asked, "You think I could do this?"

I could feel my eyebrows crinkle and I asked, "Why would I not?"

"Because I've done the opposite of protecting and serving for most of my career."

"I would disagree. When you joined SHIELD, you were protecting and serving. I mean, sure, you were doing it on a larger scale, but I think police is the perfect job for you," I argued.

"Hmm."

"Hmm, indeed. Just think about it, Nat. I know you'll kill it whatever you choose, I just don't like seeing you so bored."

"I'm not bored," she insisted, again.

"Yes, you are. You can tell me all you want, but I think you and I both know that you want something to do, but you don't want to go back to SHIELD or the Avengers or whatever. So why not use your skills for something else?"

She sighed, admitting defeat, and said, "Fine. I'll think about it."

\--

**Bucky POV**

Having my new arm was like having my whole world back. It made me feel more whole than I'd felt in a long time. My pain was less, my balance was better, and everything just felt good. There were still some spots of pain, but honestly, they were minor, all things considered. After Tony left, I settled into my bedroom and read for a few hours, marveling at the arm and how wonderful it was to have it. As I processed through that and read my book, thoughts flew through my head at an alarming rate. The one that kept coming up though was what I was going to do with myself. A few ideas opened up in my head, but I wanted to consider all of them. I paused in my reading to open up my phone and leave myself a reminder to call Dr. Miller tomorrow. We hadn't spoken and I wanted to ask her what she thought of my ideas.

\--

When I got Dr. Miller on the phone, she asked me how I was doing and I could honestly tell her I was doing really well. I felt better than I had in a long time and everything seemed to be coming together. My PTSD was still a thing and I had my bad days, but things were looking up. After we got that out of the way I asked, "So, I was wondering if I could get your opinion on something, Doc."

"Of course, Bucky, I'm always happy to offer advice."

"I was thinking, now that things are better for me, about I wanted to do," I began, not really knowing how to start, but knowing I needed to get it out.

"Yeah? Any ideas?"

"I was thinking about being a veterinarian."

"Huh. Not something I would have thought for you, but something that I'm intrigued by. I think you should research it and find out all the information you can. But I don't think it's a bad idea. What do you want to do with that degree?" she asked.

"I was thinking about running a rescue clinic from the house. We have space and I have the time. It's been special for me to work with our horse, Voin, and I'd love to keep doing that."

"I think that's a beautiful idea, Bucky. But I think you should also talk it over with Steve and Natalia before you do anything," she recommended.

"Yeah, I'll do that, after I get some research started."


	44. Chapter 44

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SMUT HERE. You've been warned.

**Natasha POV**

After Steve handed me the packet of info about the police, we watched some movies and allowed James his space. When we sat down to eat, it was clear something was on his mind, so we just let him process. Once dishes were done and everything was cleaned up, we all headed up to bed and Steve helped James take off the arm while I got settled. Once we were all snuggled into bed, I smiled and said, "Yasha, I'm so happy for you."

He smiled back at me and said, "I am too, Natalia. You do know you can call me Bucky, though, right? I mean I respond more to that than I do James anyway."

"I know. But when I met you, you were James, and I'd like to think James is almost the same guy as Bucky. If you really want me to call you Bucky all you have to do is let me know."

He paused, looking thoughtful, and then answered, "Nah. I don't mind. Although to everyone else, I think I'll be Bucky."

I nodded and flipped on something for all of us to watch. We all fell asleep snuggled together and it finally felt like all of the pieces fit.

\--

The following morning, Steve, James, and I all had things to do, so we all went about our business. I headed out to the garden, not only to take care of things there but to process through the idea of maybe being a police officer or detective. It wasn't an idea that had crossed my mind, but it was a good one. About two hours into my work and thinking, my phone buzzed and I pulled it out to see FRIDAY asking me to come inside because James wanted to talk. It piqued my curiosity so I let her know to let him know I was on my way.

When I finally got inside, he and Steve were sitting on the couch and I said, "Just going to wash my hands. Will be one sec."

They nodded and I rushed to wash my hands of all the garden dirt. When I got back to the couch James suddenly looked nervous. But he seemed to have something on his mind, so he steeled himself and said, "I've been thinking about what I could do now that I have both arms and most things are under control for me. I know I need some surgeries on my knees, but I think those can wait a little bit, and maybe they can get handled when I move on from the dentures. Since we got Voin, I've loved working with him. I know there are more animals that need help around and I figure we have the room to run an animal sanctuary. Thoughts?"

Steve and I both looked at each other and smiled. Steve spoke for both of us when he said, "That sounds like a fabulous idea, Buck."

He grinned and continued, "I also think it might be nice to be a veterinarian."

That came as a shock not only to me but to Steve as well. I thought it over and said, "Well, I think you'd make a swell veterinarian, James."

Steve seemed to be stuck, but he soon came back and said, "Well, if that's what you want, I say go for it. We'll have two doctors in the house and between the two of us, I think we could have some fun with that."

James's eyes darkened and he said, "Well, Stevie, I never took you for the role-playing type."

"I'm not. But with you two, I'll try."

I grinned and James and I made eye contact and lascivious grins came to both our faces. Steve clearly noticed and said, "Oh no, I shouldn't have said that."

"Too late now, Stevie. We're both going to be having our way with you," James replied, voice simmering with desire.

I took a chance and glanced down to check and see if James was just talking or if he was really into it. I noticed a slight bulge in his pants and I grinned like a lune. I stood up and grabbed James and Steve both by the hands and dragged them up to our room. Once we were all settled on the bed, Steve was practically vibrating with want, and James's tent had grown in size. I turned to Steve and said, "Take a deep breath and calm down for me. This is his first time that wasn't forced or under torment in a long time."

He seemed to come back to himself and he took a deep breath and relaxed. I took that to mean he was better so I turned my attention back to James, who's heated gaze was lingering on both Steve and I. I took that to mean that he was still okay, but I asked, "You still good, love?"

"All green here, my love."

I raised my eyebrow at the term and nodded in approval. I added, "You let us know when it's not, okay?"

He nodded back and I climbed on top of him and we began to kiss. His lips were just the way I remembered them and I couldn't help but smile. We pulled apart and I could hear Steve breathing. I chuckled and said, "Steve, come here and do that thing you do with my nipples. James, you're okay with his head on your chest?"

He nodded and Steve came over and placed his head on James's chest. I stripped off my top and sports bra and let my breasts hang free. I went back to kissing James while Steve immediately sucked one of my nipples into his mouth. I shivered and twitched at the contact and felt the zing it sent up my spine. We continued like that for a long time, just exploring how everything felt and getting to know each other as a threesome rather than just as Steve and I. James seemed to be writhing in the bed, desperate for something. So, I pulled back, forcing Steve to release my nipple and when James could speak he said, "Stevie, on your back."

Steve did as asked, flopping onto the bed, and spreading out his arms. James grinned and grabbed the bottom of the t-shirt Steve was wearing and slowly pulled it up. As he pulled, he pressed kisses to Steve's well-sculpted abs and each kiss made a shudder go through Steve. While he was pulling Steve's shirt off the rest of the way, I was stripping off my pants, glad I went with something more than just my general workout underwear. I laid next to Steve and grabbed one of his hands in order to ground him. James continued to kiss up and down Steve's chest and abdomen, giving special attention to his nipples and the trail of hair beneath his belly button. Steve was bright red and panting.

For the next few minutes, James continued to get to know Steve and I just continued to watch, feeling the heat and pressure build between us. When James was finally happy, he pulled back and stripped off his own shirt. Steve and I both let out gasps at the sight, and instantly James covered himself. Steve grabbed his arms and said, "No. Not a gasp of horror, but a gasp of beauty. Still as gorgeous as the day I saw you in Azzano."

He paused and looked at Steve and slowly pulled his arms away from his torso. Once he was fully relaxed again, he climbed off of Steve and laid next to him. We all took a moment and I said, "You know, boys, I'm kinda feeling a little underdressed here."

They both whipped over to look at me and instantly the heat was back on. They both stripped off their sweats quickly and I could see both of their straining erections. I climbed over Steve forcing him to move to my other side and I said, "On your knees, boys. Facing each other."

They did as asked, and they were instantly kissing, with me right between their erections. I decided to go for James first because I'd done this with Steve before, so I grazed my fingers over the straining tent of his briefs and he let out a low groan. I pushed them down and let his erection spring free and began to caress it. He shivered and moaned as I kitten licked and kissed up and down the length. Once I understood everything, I began to suck him off in earnest. It didn't take much time before he released down my throat. I swallowed and pulled off, enjoying the taste that was settling on my tongue. I came up for some air and James and Steve had parted from their kissing and James said, "I wanna suck you off, Stevie."

I felt more than heard the whimper that Steve let out, and he flopped back on the bed next to me and spread his legs. James moved over to Steve and I climbed over his chest, implying to him what I wanted. I felt him lift his hips so James could get his briefs off, and once he settled back down, I knew James was in for a good time. Steve was fun to suck off because he was quite vocal. But this time might be a little different. I shifted a little so Steve would have access and allowed him to eat me out. Many men had tried this with me and so far, Steve was the only one who was able to get me off. But, I was really okay with that. He was letting out lots of noise at what James was doing to him and I wasn't mad at it. Every moan and groan hit me right in the right place and it felt awesome. Steve continued to lick and suck and bite, and I could feel James really getting into it. But, again, before I knew it Steve tightened up and I could tell he was done. I pulled back, but Steve grabbed me by the thighs and flipped us so I was on the bottom. Before he got back to work, he said, "Condoms and lube are in the drawer next to the bed. We both need condoms. I want you in me, Buck. Make me come."

I watched as James's eyes darkened to nearly black and he went right for the table. Meanwhile, Steve continued to eat me out, and sooner than I would have thought I came with a shout. Steve pulled away and I settled down into the bed. James was just finishing rolling the condom onto Steve, who had already gotten hard again, thank you super soldier refractory periods. I watched as James spread some lube over his fingers and began to fuck Steve. Not only did Steve seem to be more vocal than when he got a blow job, but he seemed to be quite sensitive. I couldn't see how many fingers James was using, but fairly quickly, Steve grunted, "In- ah- now- fuck- Bucky."

"It's too soon, Steve."

"No... Like the hurt... Plus, healing. I'm fine," he panted out.

James sighed, knowing there really wasn't a way he was going to beat Steve on this one. He pulled his hand and asked, "Me in first or you in Nat?"

"You."

He took that as his cue and pressed in and Steve let out a keen. It was very sexy and I loved hearing come from Steve. It took a few moments, but once James was fully seated, they both shuffled forward and Steve lined himself up with me and James set the pace. It was fast, but not too hard, and I loved every second of it. With each press, I felt Steve and James and it was a feeling I never wanted to forget. It didn't take long before we were all shouting with our second orgasms of the night. I flopped onto my back and James and Steve both quickly pulled out and flopped down on either side of me. I chuckled and said, "Well, I think that answers James's question about being a vet."

He and Steve both laughed, and we all got cleaned up quickly and fell asleep snuggled together and content.


	45. Chapter 45

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Steve POV section of this chapter is pretty filler. But I love it.

**Steve POV**

Following that first time between the three of us, sex became a regular and quite fun occurrence. We all loved it and we all trusted each other to the point that nothing was weird anymore. I hadn't had this much sex in my life up to this point and both Nat and Bucky were clearly enjoying all of the sex they were getting to have. It not only brought out an intense physicality in all of us, but it bonded us tighter together. Plus, I think it gave Bucky the final push he needed to be more physically affectionate. Before, he would touch us, but there generally wasn't much there. After though, each touch felt like he was lighting up a fire on my nerves. I nearly shivered with every touch and it was very distracting.

But life went on. The dogs continued loving life, growing as time went on, and learning more and more every day. Because of Bucky's work with Voin, he could be ridden and Bucky would spend hours just exploring the property that we owned. He discovered all sorts of things and seeing him come in from his rides with Voin was its own kind of gift. In addition to that, Bucky had begun his own work on an undergraduate degree in Veterinary and Biomedical Science at Penn State. He'd had several discussions with the head of admissions and he was only going to be required to take the major courses and not the general education courses. The same was true for me and we both could be done with our Bachelors degrees within a year. It kind of sucked that he had to commute so far, but it actually kind of worked out for us because I would go with him and I could do some of my online classwork on his campus. Without a reason, I didn't leave our property often. So, we both went to campus and I continued my degree, and Bucky started on his.

As things evened out and May began, we finally began with our animals on the homestead. Leading up to placing the order, when I wasn't working on classwork and other things, I was researching my face off on the best way to start our little flock. It was hard to find the information I needed but eventually, I came to a few conclusions. One of which was that I was going to need a large coop for the chickens. That led to another lost few hours looking into the best ways to build a coop and the best options to raise happy, healthy chickens. Then came the process of deciding the breeds we wanted. We had already agreed on endangered breeds, but which ones were its own challenge. But, after thinking about it, we decided on Buff Orpingtons for eggs and meat. We didn't want to overwhelm ourselves and using a dual purpose bird felt like the best option. Again, I fell down a serious rabbit hole looking for information on the best way to start us out, but eventually, I decided I just needed to do it and we'd either sink or swim. So, I put in our order for chicks, making sure to balance out the flock in terms of gender.

Just after Bucky's arm surgery was when the chicks arrived and it was a thrilling day in the house. I'd been feverishly building a huge coop for them, with the help of Tony's people. They'd been amazing to us in the time we'd known them and it was a genuine pleasure to see them. Once the coop was fully built came the process of ordering all of the supplies, which led to another research hole and lost time. But eventually, everything evened out and the chicks arrived at a happy, healthy, and wonderful home, at about one week old. Bucky was enamored with watching the chicks and it was so much fun to watch them grow. The dogs had even grown to love them, which was its own entertainment.

Since we'd rescued Voin all those months ago, Bucky had asked Nat if she would be willing to contact the man we got him from, in order to let him know that if he ever ran into any more tough cases, that he would be willing to take them on. She obliged with a grin and as the new chicks were settling in, about a week after their arrival, Bucky's phone rang. He seemed to be a little confused, but he picked up and suddenly he had a very serious expression on his face.

\--

**Bucky POV**

When my phone rang a week after getting our new chicks, I wasn't sure who was calling, but I also knew that not many people had this number. I picked up with, "Hello?"

"Hi. Um, is this James?"

"It is, may I ask who's calling?"

"Oh, sorry, I was given your number by Natalie Rushman. She told me that if I had any tough horses, you were a good person to contact," he explained.

"Oh! Please, call me Bucky. Are you the one we adopted a horse from?" I asked.

"I think so. How's he doing?"

"He's great. What can I do for you?"

"I just got in another rough case, and I think you might be the perfect person for the job."

My face went serious and I said, "I'm glad you have that kind of faith in me. What's the situation?"

"She was found in an abandoned lot. I think her owner died a while ago and no one knew she was there until a few weeks ago. She's way too thin and very untrusting of people. She's better than the Mustang was, but I don't know how to help her. I saw how good you were with him and I think you might be the perfect person," he explained and I instantly knew I was going to help her.

"Alright. I'd be happy to take her. How much?" I replied.

"Free of charge. I only charged you for him because I wasn't sure about you. Now that I know you'll take the harder ones, I'm not going to make you pay. I make plenty of money breeding and selling horses to other people."

"Are you sure? I have plenty of money to pay you," I argued.

"Thank you, Bucky. But it's fine. You're doing me a huge favor and I think she'll be happier with you."

"Alright. We'll leave in just a little bit and I'll call you when we arrive, okay?"

He agreed and I hung up the phone. I looked up and Steve and Natalia were already running around the house gathering their and my things. Within twenty minutes, all three of us and Kilo were ready to go. Alpha was staying at home to make sure everything was safe, but also because he was the leader of our little pack. I wasn't sure how well this horse would react to his more dominant personality, so Kilo was the better bet to bring with us to see how the horse would react.


	46. Chapter 46

When we pulled up to the breeder, I had to admit I was excited. I'd fallen in love with horses through Voin and I was excited to see if this new horse would turn out as well as Voin had. He was still skittish around other people, but we were working on it. Steve and Natalia had fallen just as much as I had and I was hoping that Voin would allow Natalia to ride him soon. She loved horses and I wanted her to have a chance to ride one. But, we were greeted by the owner of the company and brought into a different barn than last time. Now that the weather was better the horses were all out prancing around and grazing, which brought a smile to my face. When we got to the stall where our new horse was waiting, I was stopped in my tracks. She was stunning, for one thing, but she was so underweight, I was instantly concerned. I passed Kilo's leash off to Steve and approached slowly. The owner explained, "She's a Blue Roan American Quarter Horse. She's a few years old, but we don't know for sure."

"She's stunning. Do you think she'll let me in the stall?"

"I don't know. She hardly lets me or anyone else in, but you did just fine last time."

I nodded and approached slowly, making sure to keep my posture relaxed and non-threatening. The horse was watching me with wild eyes, but I just spoke to her in soft whispers and made sure I was remaining calm. I watched her ears for signs of distress and she seemed to be okay with me approaching. When I reached the door to the stall, I unlatched it and it came undone with a thunk. I noticed that startled the horse a little, so I paused and waited for her to calm back down. It took about 10 minutes for her to relax again, so I just whispered, "Steve? Take Kilo off the leash and get him to sit for me?"

I knew he would hear me and I could hear him doing as I asked. Once I got inside the stall, I grabbed the rope that was there and attached it to her neck in a loose harness. I opened the stall door and she slowly moved out of the stall. Once she was fully out, she moved toward where Kilo was sitting, tail wagging. He continued to sit and watch as I approached with the horse. She seemed wary of Kilo, but she continued moving forward and when she reached him, she lowered her head to Kilo's and sniffed. She huffed a little but made no move to do anything else, so I told Kilo, "Come," and he approached me. We walked out into one of the smaller paddocks and the three of us did some laps, Kilo sticking close. The horse seemed comforted by Kilo's presence, which was a relief to me. Once our laps were done, I came back and it seemed that both Steve and Natalia had wandered off, but the breeder was still there. I said, "I'll take her."

He grinned and nodded, following me back to the trailer that he had given us with Voin and I loaded her in, thanking him for providing some hay and water for the journey home. When she was all loaded up and Kilo was out of the way, I closed the doors and asked, "Where did Steve and Natalie go?"

"They seemed to have heard something somewhere."

"Okay. I'll give them a call."

He agreed and I dialed Steve first. He picked up on the third ring with, "Everything okay?"

"Everything's fine. She's loaded up and we're ready to go. Where are you and Nat?" I asked.

"Oh, we're over by the barn where we picked up Voin."

"Alright. We're headed over, but I want to leave and get home soon so she can settle in."

"Of course," Steve replied, "Come on over and we'll get going."

I loaded Kilo into the car and headed over, knowing somehow something was going to be weird or wrong.


	47. Chapter 47

**Steve POV**

While Bucky was introducing himself to our potential new horse, Nat and I were looking around the barn. I was getting lost in my own head when I was pulled out with a poke from Nat. She asked, "You hear that?"

I listened and I actually did hear something. I couldn't quite tell what it was, but I knew it was something. I nodded and she told the breeder we'd be right back. We both followed our enhanced ears, listening for where the sound was coming from. It took us about ten minutes, but we soon found our way to the other barn on the property, the one where we had first met Voin, and continued to listen. The noise had become louder and more distinct and it finally dawned on me that we were hearing some kittens. Their mews were quiet, but enough that someone like Nat or I would be able to hear them.

Nat pulled out her phone and I knew she was dialing for FRIDAY. Tony had built her into our phones and she could do a lot, even from something as simple as a smartphone. Nat asked, "Scan for heat signatures?"

About a minute later, Nat hung up the phone and moved toward one of the ladders in the barn. Both barns had lofts above the horse stalls, so I followed her up and we made our way to one of the corners, where the mewing became even louder. In a little pile of hay was a small pile of kittens along with their mama. The mama looked undernourished and covered in fleas, but she didn't seem to be in terrible health. The kittens were wriggling and writhing so much in their little pile that I couldn't tell how many there were, but there were more than one or two, that was certain.

Just as I was getting lost in watching them, my phone vibrated in my pocket and I realized it must have been Bucky. We had a brief conversation and he was on his way to us. I let Nat know I was going down to meet him and two minutes later he walked in the barn and asked, "All good?"

"Almost. While you were doing your horse whisperer thing, Nat heard something and it led us here. We found something up in the loft. Come see?" I asked.

He looked at me skeptically, and said, "I don't know what you're up to, Steve, but whatever it is, I don't like it."

"I think you might change that tune, Barnes."

He sighed in defeat and followed me up to the loft, where Nat had sat down on the floor and was stroking the head of the mama cat. I watched Bucky's face and saw the moment he melted at the sight of the kittens. I grinned in triumph and said, "Told you."

"Shut it, Rogers."

I chuckled and headed back down to the first floor of the barn where the breeder was waiting. He asked, "Everything okay?"

"I think so. Do you have a couple of towels we can use and a cardboard box that you don't need?" I asked.

"Yes? But why?"

"We found a mama and her kittens up there. Did you know they were there?"

He seemed to be surprised and answered, "No, I didn't. Huh. I'll go grab you that box and towels."

I nodded and waited, listening to Bucky and Nat whisper about the kittens and their mama. I grinned at the thought of bringing these little lives back home with us. It took about 15 minutes for the man to return with a large box and several towels. I put the box on the floor of the barn and spread the towels out to make a little nest for the mama and her kittens. Once that was done, I called up to Nat, "Okay, if you want to grab the mama and hand her down to me, you can."

A moment later, Nat's head appeared over the edge and I climbed halfway up the ladder and she passed off the mama, who seemed not happy with this new development. I quickly moved down and put her in the box, where she laid and seemed to be waiting for her babies. A minute later, Bucky joined me and placed three kittens into the box next to their mama; Nat followed, and she was also holding three kittens, which she placed into the box as well. So, six kittens plus a mama. Hm. I think we could handle this.

Once everyone was safe in the box, Nat grabbed it and the three of us, along with the breeder, headed back to the car. Once we all arrived, Bucky got settled into the back with Kilo while Nat settled into the passenger seat with the box. Before I got in the car, I said to the breeder, "Thank you."

"No, thank you. I had no idea they were there and I don't know what would have happened to them if you hadn't heard them. How did you hear them, by the way?"

I chuckled to myself and replied, "Think about it, and I think you'll figure it out."

I hopped into the car and began the long journey home, grinning at the new serendipitous additions to our family and homestead. When we finally got on the road back home, I called our vet, the one we'd been working with since we adopted the dogs, and asked if they would be willing to come over and check on our new horse, along with looking over the kittens and making sure they and the mama were healthy.

\--

When we arrived back home, the sun was moving toward going down, but it was still light out. Bucky hopped out with Kilo before we were even fully stopped, but I knew he was just excited about our new horse. Once he got her out of the trailer and closed the doors, Nat and I drove up to the house to park the car and the trailer. I'd take care of the trailer later. We both got out of the car and brought our new additions inside, where Alpha was waiting for us. I gave him some love and he followed us into the family room where Nat settled them on the coffee table. I settled down next to her and Alpha was sniffing at the box, wanting to know what was in there. We didn't allow him to see them, but he was demanding to know what was in there. I chuckled at him and allowed him to join me on the couch. Nat moved the box from the table to the couch between us and Alpha could finally see what was going on inside. He sniffed and then turned to me, clearly wanting to see and know more. I laughed and said, "You'll get to meet them later. For now, I need you to be calm and let them be. They're new."

Before he could do anything else there was a knock at the door and he was off and barking. With a look, I told Nat to stay where she was and I got up to answer the door. I welcomed our vet in and brought her to the couch to say hi to Nat and see the kittens and their mama. She looked each of them over and I could see her worrying. She told us that the mama was still a kitten herself at only about a year old, and her kittens were only about two weeks old. But, she knew who we were and what we had here, so she told us to run a complete blood panel and check for all diseases in the cats, and based on the results, she'd get us what we needed. We agreed, and she also told us that all of them were going to need a flea bath and shots. The shots were a given, but the flea bath was unexpected. She recommended we get a flea comb and use dish soap to clean them, so I added that to my mental list.

Once she was done, I took her to the horse barn where Bucky was getting our new horse settled in. She said hi and got to work looking over her. She recommended we run a blood panel on her as well, along with making sure she was getting fed. She was clearly underweight, but that was something we all knew. Other than that, we were told she looked to be in good health and anything else would show up in tests that we could run here. We all nodded and thanked her for coming out. Once she left, I asked, "Buck, any names for her?"

He smiled and replied, "Nashel."

I thought about it for a moment and then asked, "What does it mean?"

"Found, in Russian."

"Aww, that's sweet, Buck," I replied, knowing that Bucky put a lot of thought into the names he gave our animals.

He blushed at the compliment and asked, as we walked back to the house, "Any names for the cats?"

"I was thinking Scio for the mama."

He seemed to pause for a moment and then asked, "Irish?"

I was surprised he remembered, but I replied, "Yeah. Short for sciobol, which means barn."

"Hm. That's a great one, Stevie."

We had gotten back to the house and Nat was in the kitchen, with the box of kittens and their mama sitting on one of our barstools. She was making some quick dinner and she asked when we walked in, "Do one of you mind running out to the store to get some stuff for these guys? I don't want to have to wait on anything to get here, and plus I don't want the dogs to get fleas too."

I looked at Buck and I could tell he didn't really want to leave. I said, "I'll go. I'm going to take the other car. The truck is still attached to the trailer."

"I'll go take care of that while you're gone and when you get back, we'll eat and then get the kittens taken care of," Bucky replied. I agreed and kissed them both before I left and then headed out to the pet store to pick up everything we would need.


	48. Chapter 48

It took me over an hour, but when I returned home, I had enough supplies to help us out. I grabbed multiple emergency feeding kits, just in case we needed them because one or more of the kittens wasn't getting what they needed from mama, dry and wet cat food for the mama, litter boxes, litter, cat toys, a few scratching posts, several flea combs, flea shampoo, a ton of blankets, and some flea medicine and flea shampoo for the dogs. I made a stop at a baby store too, to pick up a large playpen, so we could move them out of the box they were in.

When I arrived home, it took two trips to bring everything in, but once it was all there, I headed into the kitchen and was quickly passed a plate of food. I kissed Bucky and Nat in thanks and began shoveling the food into my mouth. It had been a long day, and while I'd eaten, I was quite ravenous. While I was doing that, Nat and Bucky were bringing in the bags and beginning to sort everything out. They separated the flea shampoo and flea combs because we were going to use them now, and put the blankets into a pile to be washed once the tags were off. The playpen was quickly unpacked and put aside to be brought up to the bedroom with us so we could have our new additions close. The litter, cat food, and feeding kits were put there as well, and the toys were put aside for use once the mama and her babies were ready for them. The litter box was brought into the kitchen to be washed and then put with everything else. Bucky took the blankets to be washed quickly and also grabbed some towels to use when we were done with the bathing.

Once I was finished and the kitchen was cleaned up, we put the dogs in their crates, for now, so they wouldn't bother us while we were working, and we brought the little family into the bathroom to begin cleaning them up. We started with the mama so that when the kittens were done they could go right back with her. We put her in the bathtub, and she was not happy with the situation. Bucky had to hold her in there with his metal arm, gently, of course, in order to be able to wash her with the flea soap and get out all of the fleas. Because of her grey and black coloring, it was hard to get them, but after about an hour, we got everything and she was done. Bucky placed her in a towel I was holding out and I began to rub her dry. She hated every minute of it, but I think we both knew it had to be done, so she didn't put up too much of a fight. Once she was as dry as I could get her, Nat had gotten her blow dryer out and we got her the rest of the way dry with that; we placed her in the playpen on a nest of clean towels and an electric heating pad, in case she or the kittens needed it. We'd eventually replace them with blankets, but for now, towels would do.

Once she was settled into the playpen, it was time to start on the kittens. We moved the box onto the counter and Buck and I got to work. We would each grab a kitten and hold it up to one of FRIDAY's cameras. It was a little weird to have cameras in the bathroom, but we could engage privacy at any time. She would help identify the sex of the kitten and then we would get to work cleaning them. They were a lot easier to deal with, not only because they were smaller, but because they were so young. They didn't have a reason to fear water yet and they kind of took it as best as they could. When we were done, we'd pass them off to Nat and move on to the next one. After all six were bathed, dried with the blow dryer, and back with mama, we had three boys and three girls. All six kittens looked different, which was a surprise to us, but it made it easier to identify and name them when we started thinking about that. In the end, we named one of the females, who looked the most like the mama, with the grey and black tabby coloring, Tua, which was short for tuathanas, Scottish Gaelic for farm. One of the other females, who was all white, we named Alley, because Bucky thought he was hilarious and wanted to remind me of all my back alley fighting. The last female was a calico and we ended up naming her Delphi because Nat liked the name and we all thought it was cute. The first male kitten, a brown tabby, was named Aristotle, honestly, because we thought it was a cute name. The next male kitten got named Tip, and he was an orange tabby; so named because again, it was cute and a little different. The final kitten was male and named Hercules; he had what FRIDAY told us was tuxedo coloring, all black except for the chest and some of the face, and he also had white socks. All six of them were adorable and I couldn't wait to see how they grew and who they became.

Once they were all clean, dry, and back with mama, we set up the litter box for her. FRIDAY would keep monitoring them throughout the night and if she needed to, she would wake us up. Once we were all clean and ready for bed, we checked on the family once more and then all fell into bed. It had been a long day and all of us were ready to get some sleep.

\--

The following morning, after not being woken up by FRIDAY in the night, we were all hopeful. After finishing up our morning routine, Bucky went to grab some supplies from the lab so he could take blood samples from all of the kittens, Scio, and Nashel. It was slow going for him, but he eventually got all of the samples he needed and went to run them. While he was doing that, I was washing the dogs with the flea shampoo I had purchased the other day and giving them a dose of flea medicine. Nat had started a load of laundry with the towels we had gotten from the breeder, the towels we had used when we bathed them, and the towels that we had in the playpen. The blankets were ready to go in, so she took care of that and began ordering a bunch of stuff from the internet to be delivered.

At around noon, Bucky came back with the results of the labs he had run and he had let us know that the kittens and their mama all had several different types of worms but were otherwise healthy, and they would all need rabies vaccines and other normal shots. That was a relief and he informed us that he had sent off the reports to the vet and had gotten a response that she would be sending all of the meds we would need to make sure they were healthy. She also requested that once the kittens were about eight weeks old, we bring all seven of them in to get spayed and neutered so we wouldn't add to our little clowder. We were thankful that everyone was pretty healthy and any problems that they had were easily taken care of with medicine. He promised that we would bring all of them in to get spayed and neutered as soon as they were old enough.

Bucky also informed us that nothing came up on Nashel's blood panel, which brought us all relief. He knew she would need to have her hooves taken care of and a few other things seen to, but he could handle all of that because he'd been doing it with Voin since we'd gotten him. Other than being severely underweight, Nashel was healthy and we could get her weight up fairly quickly through providing her with food all the time and adding supplemental fats and other healthy proteins to her diet. Bucky knew she was going to take some work, but he had faith that she would be fine by the time autumn came around. Also, he thought that Voin might improve even faster now that he had a friend in the barn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For reference, here is all of the information you need for the cats:  
Mama Cat--American Shorthair Tabby--Scio, short for sciobol--Irish for barn--grey and black  
Six Kittens:  
1\. Tua--short for Tuathanas--Scottish Gaelic for Farm--female--grey and black  
2\. Alley--female--white  
3\. Delphi--female--calico  
4\. Aristotle--male--brown  
5\. Tip--male--orange  
6\. Hercules--male--tuxedo


	49. Chapter 49

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clowder is the collective term for a group of cats. :)

**Steve POV**

A year can change so much. Since we brought Nashel and the clowder home, things had really evened out. Bucky and I were both finished with our Bachelors and we had both been focused on studying. Me for the MCATs and Bucky for the GRE. We both needed good scores to get into UPenn, me in the med school, and Bucky in the vet school. We were both confident, but also scared. Nat had dealt a lot with the Philadelphia PD and was able to forego the Police Academy and start right in the force. It wasn't traditional, but with her experience, the folks in charge were willing to bend the rules. She'd settled in easily and she loved her job. She loved helping people, without the pressure of saving the world. Plus, she got the chance to put everyday bad guys away, which soothed some of her worries about the red in her ledger. Buck and I had both told her that she was good and she didn't need to worry, but she was stubborn.

The homestead was constantly growing. Now that Bucky and I were done with our Bachelors and not back in school yet, we had plenty of time to work on the garden and on raising our animals, though Bucky was the one primarily in charge of dealing with the animals. He was the future veterinarian, after all. The dogs were amazing as usual, taking to new jobs and experiences like ducks to water, no pun intended. The cats had grown into lazy, happy, beautiful animals, who loved being inside or outside as much as anything. Scio, the mama cat, spent a lot of her time in the horse barn, which I guess worked, as her name meant barn, and Tua, the one who looked most similar, spent all of her time prowling around the whole farm and garden, which also fit as her name was short for farm. The other five of them spent a lot of time inside but also enjoyed spending some time in the outside world. We'd taken a weekend to build them a catio, which was as ridiculous an idea as we'd ever had, but they loved it like nothing else, so the effort was worth it.

Our chickens were happy as could be, and we'd learned a lot in a year. We quickly learned how to balance out our flock in a way that was most healthy for the chickens, rather than what our preferences were. Having fresh eggs daily was a wonderful gift, along with not needing to purchase hormone-laden meats at the store. All three of us had very sensitive palettes, and we didn't like the taste of mass-produced meats. Having them fresh on the farm was a blessing. Since we'd ordered the chickens and gotten the hang of things, we'd expanded our horizons into ducks as well. We'd decided on the Buff breed, which would work for both eggs and meat, as we did with the chickens. It was less overwhelming and easier for us to keep track of. Dual-purpose birds had served us well, and we didn't want to look a gift horse in the mouth.

When we first bought our property, we built an additional huge barn; and by huge I mean about an acre in area. It was 210 x 210 feet, and because it was built by Tony's people, we knew it was sturdy and would hold up. We ended up deciding to build a separate coop for the chickens, who we were going to put in the barn, but we decided against that. But we did use the barn for the ducks, which lived in one very large quarter of the barn. The ducks had an open area off the barn for grazing and exploring, with a path that was fenced in so they wouldn't wander. We kept food and water around at all times for them, and there was always a small pool of water for them to swim around in if they wanted it when the weather was nice. We also set up a series of nesting boxes for the ducks, even though they didn't need them. It made it easier for us to collect the eggs when we wanted to. Duck eggs had become a wonderful part of our lives and while we didn't use the ducks often for meat, it was a nice change-up every now and then.

In addition to the chickens and the ducks, we'd added livestock to our lives as well. We wanted to start with the smallest option, so we decided on Nigerian Dwarf Goats. They were small enough that we could easily handle them, and they provided us with a great source of milk for making different types of cheese and other dairy products. We had considered using them for meat as well, but we were getting other options, so we decided to not use them for that. They lived in another quarter of our barn, with a fenced-in pathway like the ducks. Their outdoor area was filled with toys and things for them to climb on so they wouldn't get bored. Herding them was quite the challenge, but we'd come up with a wonderful solution to that. After the goats settled in, we moved up in size to the sheep, which we used for both wool and meat. Through our research, we decided on the Shetland breed, which would work for both. Same as everyone else, they had a separate quarter of the barn, which was plenty of space for them to roam, along with an outdoor space for grazing. Herding them was also a complicated matter, but it was fixed the same way as the goats. Collecting wool had been a unique experience, but Nat had been knitting up a storm and Bucky had even gotten in on it because it helped him keep up his dexterity with the arm.

Our last livestock animals were cows. We decided on two breeds, one for meat and one for dairy. It forced us to split off the remaining quarter of the barn into two, but both breeds had plenty of space. For the milk, we went with Kerry cows, and for the meat, we went with Highland cows. Both were gorgeous, and we loved them all. We were still getting into the hang of things with the cows, but we were sure that things would eventually even out with our routine. We were all lucky we were enhanced because it was a ton of work running a homestead this big. But it was certainly worth it, getting fresh milk every day and being able to have beef that was hand raised by us and killed humanely and without pain. The meat was fresh and delicious, and we didn't have to deal with jumping through hoops to get it. I mean, it was hard work, but it was highly worth it.

Our solution to the herding problem was quite simple. We just looked for herding and guarding dogs. We had our list narrowed down pretty quick to the best breeds and the breeds that we wanted, but from there, it was impossible to choose. But, we soon realized that we had four breeds of each type of dog. We knew it was going to be a TON of work, but with four of each breed, we could put one with each species of animal. Alpha and Kilo would still remain our home dogs and wouldn't be responsible for any work, other than spending time with us, the horses, and the cats. For our Guarding Dogs, we chose a female Great Pyrenees, a male Kuvasz, a male Pyrenean Mastiff, and a female Caucasian Shepherd. All four of them were known for their skills as guarding dogs, and their calm temperaments made them an easy choice. For our Herding Dogs, we chose a female Australian Shepherd, a female Rough Collie, a male English Shepherd, and a male St. Bernard. We wanted to keep with the theme of naming them after military call signs, like Alpha and Kilo, so in order, we named them Charlie, Echo, Oscar, Delta, India, Juliett, Romeo, and Zulu. We searched up whether they could live and work together, and we found some great advice. We got them all as puppies, around the same time, so they could grow up together. Bucky was the one who took over the training of both types, and he was a master. He whipped our pups into shape quickly, and each of them had a species to work with.

It was tons of fun watching our new dogs grow and learn as time passed. Alpha and Kilo had both bonded with the cats and the horses really quickly. Kilo was still in love with the ground that Nashel walked on, and Alpha had taken a liking to Voin once they were introduced. After getting Nashel, Voin seemed to open up a lot more, and pretty soon after, Nat was finally able to get her ride. She loved it with everything she had and often if she wasn't working or dealing with personal matters, she was riding. Over the course of a year, we'd invited Clint and family over to the house again and again; Sam Wilson had made his way out to see us and was impressed; Tony and Pepper came out and it was quite a feat that Tony lasted the week they stayed with us; Bruce had come for a few days, which was its own interesting time; and we'd made a few friends in the neighborhood. Both Bucky and I had grown thick beards, which not only made us less recognizable, but it was an amazing addition in the bedroom.

Bucky's recovery was still going strong, with his weekly calls to Dr. Miller. He often looked like he got hit by a bus when he came out of those sessions, but it had fundamentally changed him as a person, which was its own gift. He held out with the dentures as long as he could, but around September, he decided enough was enough and planned a few surgeries to get his implants put in. Dr. Gray and Dr. Nelson came out and took care of everything in short order. Because of Bucky's enhanced healing, he was quickly able to get all of his implants in, and soon he had a full set of new teeth. He needed two knee replacement surgeries, which were stressful, but uneventful. Everything went smoothly and Bucky healed up remarkably well. His PT was still going strong, working on repairing his muscles so he wasn't in pain all the time. Nat was also continuing to work with him on massage, which had helped him immensely. Everything was rolling along with Bucky, I was doing well and dealing with my own problems, and Nat had begun working on her own issues with a different therapist, which began helping her move forward. We were all doing well. But little did we know that everything was about to get tossed out the window.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's info on the dogs:  
Livestock Guarding Dogs  
Great Pyrenees--https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Pyrenees  
Female--name: Charlie  
Kuvasz--https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kuvasz  
Male--name: Echo  
Pyrenean Mastiff--https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pyrenean_Mastiff  
Male--name: Oscar  
Caucasian Shepherd--https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caucasian_Shepherd_Dog  
Female--name: Delta  
Livestock Herding Dog  
Aussie Shepherd--https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australian_Shepherd  
Female--name: India  
Rough Collie--https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rough_Collie  
Female--name: Juliett  
English Shepherd--https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/English_Shepherd  
Male--name: Romeo  
St. Bernard--https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/St._Bernard_(dog)  
Male--name: Zulu


	50. Chapter 50

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Parentheses are the translation of Russian.

**Bucky POV**

Summer was rolling on like a freight train. It was always busy around the homestead, but we liked it like that. Steve and I had been working on the farm and in the garden a lot, while Nat was working. Steve and I were planning on taking the MCAT's and the GRE soon, but we wanted to give ourselves time. While we were out working, I couldn't see Steve, but I could hear his grunts of effort. I was comforted by the fact that even Steve, who got the most perfect form of the serum of the three of us, still found the work in the garden and on the farm insanely taxing. As I worked and listened, I heard Steve pause in what he was doing, and then he answered the phone. I paused and walked over, wanting to know what was going on. As I got closer, I noticed that Steve's face had turned white and he appeared to be stressed out. I tried to understand what was going on, but Steve wasn't saying much and I couldn't hear the person on the other end of the line. A few minutes later and Steve hung up the phone and looked up. He startled at the sight of me and I asked, "What's wrong? You look like you just saw your ma rise from the grave."

Steve chuckled, although the sound was hollow and without feeling. He stared at me for a moment before asking, "When we were growing up, did you ever want to have kids?"

I paused, "Steve, what does this have to do with why your face is the color it was in 1935?"

"Just answer the question, Barnes."

"I don't know. I think I did, but I also knew I was depthlessly in love with you and so we would never get to have children," I replied, being as honest as possible.

Steve was the one to pause, and then, "And now?"

"Of course, Stevie. I want a family with you and Natalia more than anything. I love my life and kids would only make me love it more."

"Okay. Let's go inside and get cleaned up and I'll call Nat and we'll talk," was his weird and cryptic reply.

"Steve, what's going on."

"I'll tell you, but I don't want to repeat myself."

I nodded, satisfied, so we hoofed it into the house, and quickly showered and cleaned up. We settled on the couch and Steve called Nat. She picked up with, "Steve, I'm on shift. What's the emergency?"

"I know. Do you still want kids, Nat?"

There was a pause on the other end of the line, and then, "Is there something I don't know, Steve?"

"No, Nat, I'm asking you."

"You know I do, Steve. I told you that. I can't, though, Steve, I told you that too," she answered, voice tight.

"And I told you we could fix that when you were ready. Don't you remember that? But that's not why I'm calling. I know you want to have your own baby, but how would you feel about a few little ones?"

"Steve," she answered, slowly, "What are you saying?"

"Tony just called me. He and the team were running a mission somewhere in Eastern Europe against HYDRA and they found horrible things there, but they also ran into two kids. Kids who were experimented on. Enhanced kids, Nat."

"So why would he call you?" she asked, voice sharp.

"You know why, Nat. We're the best people to help them. Not only because we are also enhanced, but we know what dealing with trauma is like, and we can help them."

My heart was racing, but I added, "Просто, чтобы вы знали, Наталья, я в восторге от этой идеи. Я хочу иметь ребенка с тобой, но я думаю, что мы должны помочь. У нас есть место, и я думаю, что было бы неплохо добавить в нашу семью. Не так ли?" (Just so you know, Natalia, I am very much on board with this idea. I want to have a baby with you, but I think we should help. We have space, and I think it would be nice to add to our family. Don't you?)

Steve had learned Russian over the last year, so he gasped at my admission, and there was a long pause. Then, "Do you know what the plan is?"

"They're flying back here from Europe now. With Tony's jets, they should be here by the end of the day," Steve replied.

There was a deep sigh on the other end of the phone, and then Nat finally said, "Okay. I'm going to run and ask for an extended leave and I'll be home as soon as I can. Clear out the bedroom closest to ours, go to the Ikea in South Philly, and pick up two twin beds, a dresser each, and whatever else you think they'd like. Do you know their genders?"

"Boy and girl," Steve answered.

"Then go to Target and pick up clothes for the boy. Simple, not too much, and comfortable. We don't want to overwhelm. When I'm done here, I'll stop by and grab stuff for the girl. Ages?"

"Twins, both six years old," he replied.

"Okay. Go. Call me if you need anything."

"Will do, bye Nat."


	51. Chapter 51

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are three languages used in this chapter. The first is Polish, followed by Serbian, which Wanda and Pietro use to speak to each other, and Russian. Translations for all three are in parentheses.

**Steve POV**

By the time Bucky and I arrived back at home from Ikea and Target, Nat was also home from her shift and her own run to Target. She met us in the driveway and helped us unload everything from the car, Bucky and I taking the furniture up to the bedroom, and Nat bringing in all of the Target bags to begin sorting through everything and separating out what needed to be washed. Buck and I brought everything else in and quickly got the room set up for them. Once that was done, Nat swept in, her arms full of stuff to decorate the room and she got started.

After she was done, the room looked like it was ready for a pair of six-year-olds, rather than an extra room we hardly used. Once we were done with that, the laundry was finally done and we had a laundry folding party with all of the new clothes. Many hands make light work, so we finished quickly and put everything into the drawers of the two dressers. By the time we were done, we all needed showers and a little time to prepare for their arrival. Once we were all clean, the sun was just beginning to move toward going down and I knew Tony would be arriving soon with the rest of the team and the kids. I found Nat sitting on the couch in the living room and I could tell she was scared. I settled next to her and said, "Nat, you're going to be fine."

"Steve, if there was one thing that I never expected out of my life, it's being a mother."

"I know Nat. But one thing my Ma told me when I was growing up was that no parent is ever really ready. None of us are ready for this, but we will learn as we go. We don't need to be perfect, we just need to be there for them. They need us, Nat, and I know you want to be there for them," I explained.

She let out a shuddering breath and seemed to deflate. Just as she did so, FRIDAY announced, "Steve, a Quinjet appears to be arriving within my monitored airspace."

"Alright, thanks, FRIDAY. Let Bucky know?"

She replied in the affirmative and Nat and I got up to head out to the landing zone. When we started having people over, we realized that we were going to need space for something to land, so we cleared out a big area for a quinjet or helicopter to be able to land. As Nat and I approached we were joined by Bucky who was wringing his hands and looking nervous. I smiled at the nerves because I knew it would make them better. I was nervous as all hell too, but I also knew that I had the support and when I needed it, they would be there for me.

Finally, the quinjet landed, and the ramp came down to show Sam, Tony, Bruce, and Rhodey, standing at the front. They all came down and we all passed hugs around. Last to come down the ramp was Clint, who seemed to have grown two small attachments to his hips. He held them close and appeared to be whispering to them both. Once he made his way down, the ramp returned to its position, and Nat, Bucky, and I were all staring at Clint with rapt attention. He smiled and said, "Hi. I know you want to meet them, but they've had a long few days and I think we all need to take a load off."

"Of course," I replied, "Everyone else knows this, but Rhodey, we do not allow weapons in the house. It is completely protected through FRIDAY and nothing is going to come and get you. Please leave anything weapon like on the jet. If you must bring a weapon, our only request is that it is a knife. Nat carries a gun for work, but when she is off shift, it's locked in the safe. Bucky and I both carry knives in the house, but that's it. Anything else that can be qualified as a weapon must be left in the jet. Tony, that means your armor as well." Everyone looked a little surprised, but I knew they would all respect the rule. We all trooped back to the house where all of the pups were waiting with excitement. Bucky went in first to corral them into calmness and once he came back we headed in and collapsed onto the couch. I asked, "Does anyone need medical?"

Eyes shifted, and I sighed, getting up to grab the huge first aid kit that lived in one of our guest bathrooms. Once I was back, I looked at Sam and said, "Speak now, or forever hold your peace."

He chuckled and said, "Nothing serious. There's a graze or two that could use a little attention."

"Alright. Show me, Wilson."

He did as asked, and he was patched up quickly. I moved on to Tony and he shook his head. I glanced up at the ceiling and asked, "FRIDAY?"

"It appears Tony has a few cracked ribs and a sprained ankle."

Tony looked up at the ceiling and said, "Traitor."

I grinned and said, "Shirt, Tony."

He sighed and pulled off his shirt, arc reactor shining. I quickly wrapped up his ribs to help him heal faster and then I wrapped his ankle to stabilize it. Once he was done and I turned to Rhodey, he said, "Cap, I'm good."

"FRI?"

"James appears to be healthy."

"Thanks. And thank you, Rhodey for not lying to me. Clint?" I asked.

"A few bumps and bruises, but nothing that I can't wait to handle."

I nodded knowing that he was telling me the truth. I pulled out my phone and shot off a quick text to Laura: _He's with us and the rest of the team. Generally unharmed and not lying to me about anything as far as I can tell. I get the feeling you've acquired a niece and a nephew._

Her reply was swift: _Thanks. Tell him the kids send their love. I hope I can be as good an Auntie as Nat._

I smiled and returned the kit to where it belonged and settled near Nat and Bucky. Once I was settled Clint leaned down and whispered something to the two growths he'd acquired. There were two little giggles from each of them and they slowly released from Clint and settled more into the couch. Their faces were still cuddled into his sides, but they relaxed just a little bit. Clint leaned down and whispered one more thing in their ears and they both giggled again. Their heads slowly made their way away from Clint and they began to look around. Their eyes were wide with clear shock, but there was a deep curiosity there. Clint broke through their clear shock with, "Wanda, Pietro, oboje znacie wszystkich Mścicieli, ale tak naprawdę nie możemy się tobą zająć. Nikt z nas nie może ci naprawdę pomóc. Ale mamy przyjaciół, którzy mogą. Tam jesteśmy teraz. Czy rozumiesz?" (Wanda, Pietro, you both know all of the Avengers, but we can't really take care of you. None of us can truly help you. But, we have friends who can. That's where we are now. Do you understand?) I didn't know Clint spoke Polish, but it was one of many languages I'd picked up from Bucky and Nat. I could speak it well enough, although not as well as Buck or Nat.

Clint waited for both of them to nod at his question before he continued, pointing as he spoke "To jest Steve Rogers, James Barnes i Natasha Romanoff. Wszyscy mówią po polsku i rosyjsku, więc bez względu na to, jak chcesz mówić, możesz. To jest ich dom." (This is Steve Rogers, James Barnes, and Natasha Romanoff. All of them can speak Polish and Russian, so however you want to speak, you can. This is their home.)

Again he waited for them to look at the three of us and nod before continuing, "To oni się tobą zaopiekują, dobrze? Wiem, że to było dla ciebie kilka dzikich dni, ale obiecuję ci, że żaden z nich nigdy cię nie skrzywdzi. Dlaczego nie podejdziesz do nich? Cały dzień czekali na ciebie." (They are going to be the ones to take care of you, okay? I know it's been a wild few days for you, but I promise you, none of them will ever hurt you. Why don't you go over and meet them. They've been waiting all day to see you.)

The pair of them looked back at us and slowly, achingly slowly, the little boy moved away from Clint and made his way to Bucky. Bucky kept his hands at his sides, waiting for the boy to come to him. Once the little one was right near him, he whispered, "Rozumiesz mnie?" (You understand me?)

Bucky smiled a small smile and said, "Tak, maleńka, rozumiem cię całkowicie." (Yes, little one, I understand you completely.)

The little one paused and asked, "I oni też to robią?" (And they do too?)

"Rzeczywiście, słodycze, wszyscy cię rozumiemy. Obydwoje z was. A może, kiedy tu będziesz, możemy nauczyć cię angielskiego. Brzmi dobrze?" (Indeed, sweetness, we all understand you. Both of you. And maybe while you're here we can teach you some English. Sound good?)

At that, the boy seemed to perk up. He looked over and began speaking rapid-fire, but in a language that I did not know, but sounded like Russian, "Ванда, молим те. Неће нас повредити. Знам да можеш рећи. Знам да то осећаш. Шта осећаш од њих?" (Wanda, please. They will not hurt us. I know you can tell. I know you can sense it. What do you sense from them?)

The little girl replied, voice small, "Добро. Помоћ. Срећа Љубазност." (Good. Help. Happiness. Kindness.)

"Онда дођи овамо и упознај их. Молим те, Ванда. Неће нам нашкодити." (Then come here and meet them. Please, Wanda. They're not going to harm us.)

The little girl slowly got off the couch and approached Bucky with the hesitancy of someone who knew pain. She stood next to her brother and looked at Bucky, asking, "Можете ли да нам помогнете?" (Can you help us?)

"Не знам, душо. Оно што знам је да ћемо сви дати све од себе," he replied. (I don't know, my darling. What I do know is that we all will do our best.)

She seemed to relax at that statement and then turned to face me. Her eyes were piercing and it looked like they saw much more than your average person. She stared at me for a long time before saying, "Како ме већ волиш?" (How do you love me already?)

Nat translated the Serbian for me because it was a language that I hadn't had a chance to learn but both Bucky and Nat knew it; I smiled and replied in Russian, "Имам велико срце. Дуго ми се срце мало сломило, али када сам га коначно средио, нарастао је неколико величина. Има пуно простора за Буцкија, Наташу, вашег ујака Клинта и све Осветнике, све наше псе, мачке, коње, а сада и вас обоје. Надам се да, док сте с нама, могу вас научити како и вама да расту." (I have a big heart. For a long time, my heart was a little broken, but when I finally got it fixed, it grew a couple of sizes. It has plenty of room for Bucky, Natasha, your Uncle Clint, Aunt Laura, cousins Lila and Cooper, all of the Avengers, all of our dogs, the cats, the horses, and now both of you. Hopefully, while you're with us, I can teach you how to grow your hearts too.)

Both of their eyes widened and they looked at me like I'd hung the moon. Their grins lit up the room, and I was helpless to keep my heart from melting. Before either of them could say anything, Nat interjected with, "Стеве је у праву. Научио ме како да растујем срце, а пре њега Џејмс ми је дао разлог да нађем своје срце. Сви имамо пуно места у сату срца и у нашем дому за вас обоје. Сигуран сам да неће бити тако једноставно, али једно што вам можемо обећати је да нас троје безусловно дајемо љубав. Да ли знаш шта ово значи?" (Steve is right. He taught me how to grow my heart, and before him, James gave me a reason to find my heart. All of us have plenty of room in hour hearts and in our home for both of you. I'm sure it's not going to be that simple, but one thing we can promise you is that the three of us are giving you love unconditionally. Do you know what that means?)

They looked at each other and shook their heads. Nat smiled and continued, "То значи да без обзира на све, док год живимо, волимо вас. Без обзира ко сте, ко сте постали или шта изабрали, ми ћемо вас волети. То се никада неће променити. Можда ниси дошла од нас, али никада те нећемо престати вољети." (It means that no matter what, for as long as we live, we love you. No matter who you are, who you become, or what you choose, we will love you. Nothing will ever change that. You might not have come from us, but we will never stop loving you.)

Their eyes were wide at Nat's words, and before we knew it, the two of them were climbing all over us and making themselves right at home. As soon as they snuggled down, the three of us put our focus on the others in the room. The first thing that caught my eye was Clint's eyes being the size of saucers. I smiled and he whispered, "Uncle Clint?"

"Of course. I don't take being Uncle Steve lightly, and they're going to need someone like you, Laura, and the kids. Laura is going to make a great Auntie. Plus, they're already attached. If they're not going to stay with you, they need the knowledge that you're not gone forever."


	52. Chapter 52

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is now Steve/Bucky/Nat/Darcy... I don't know how or why it happened, but it did. I'm not offended if you want to stop reading. :)

**Natasha POV**

Once all of the Avengers, minus Clint, left the house, we showed the kids their room. Seeing their eyes widen at the room was heart-breaking and also completely heart-melting. I could tell they were tired, so we all encouraged them to climb into jammies and get into bed. Once they were settled, we all placed kisses on their heads and wished them goodnight. FRIDAY was going to monitor them for us, so we could get Clint settled and work some things out with him. Once we were all settled and had beers, Clint explained their abilities. He explained that Wanda had matter manipulation, along with telekinesis and mind-reading. Pietro was a little simpler with just super speed, but he was no less interesting. Steve assured all of us that once everyone got a little more settled, he'd call Dr. Grey and have her come out to run a complete physical.

After the kids were squared away and we had all of the information, I could still tell that Clint had something on his mind. I asked, "What's up?"

"I hate you sometimes."

"No, you don't. What's wrong? You have that look on your face."

He sighed and said, "After SHIELD fell, there were a lot of people who either missed the memo or knew what was going on and ignored it. One of them is a friend of mine. She's in a bit of a pickle and doesn't have a place to stay."

"Who is it?" I asked, curious.

"Darcy Lewis."

"Thor's friend?" I asked, not sure.

"Actually, she's Thor's girlfriend's lab assistant."

"Why did she not know what happened?" Steve asked.

"She did. She and Jane Foster, Thor's girlfriend, knew what happened and the first thing she did was call Tony. He invited Jane to move into the Tower and she accepted. Darcy moved with her, but she doesn't have a lot to do in the Tower. She has a PoliSci degree and she worked with Jane because she had to for credits. She isn't doing anything at the Tower. Jane has all of the lab assistants she could need and Darcy can't really do anything because she's in danger because of her association with SHIELD through Thor and Jane."

I looked at Steve and James and I could tell they were both thinking about it. I answered, "Let us think about it. We'll get in touch with Darcy directly or take a trip to the Tower to get her."

Clint released a breath and said, "Thanks."

"No worries. Now, what medical do you need?"

"Just some band-aids. Nothing serious."

I raised my eyebrow and before I could ask if he was sure, FRIDAY interrupted with, "Clint isn't lying. He just has a few cuts and scrapes."

"Thanks, FRIDAY," Clint muttered and I calmed down. I needed to be sure that everything was going to be okay with him before I sent him home to Laura and the kids.

\--

**Bucky POV**

It took way longer than I would have thought for Wanda and Pietro to get settled in. About six months after Clint and co. brought them in, things were finally starting to even out. All of the Avengers had come for visits since then, and Clint, Laura, and the kids were pretty consistent in their visits. The kids love their Aunt Laura and Uncle Clint, along with Cousins Lila and Cooper. They'd been working hard to learn English, with the help of myself, Steve, Natalia, and FRIDAY. They were making amazing progress and we were thrilled to get to watch them grow.

Both of them also spent a lot of time working on their abilities. Pietro had been learning more and more and FRIDAY had been helping him track his speed. He seemed to be getting faster and faster as he grew, which was not only concerning but interesting. Natalia was still on leave from the force, and Steve and I had both taken our tests and gotten into UPenn. Steve was fully in student mode when he was at school, but the moment he stepped over the threshold of our home, he turned into Dad, and it was amazing. He told me I did the same thing, but it was harder for me to distinguish. We also celebrated the two year anniversary of my coming home. Even though it was hard for me to remember, I was grateful that everything happened the way it did. It continued to give me hope.

Clint also kept us abreast of what Darcy was up to and we all had been in communication with her. She expressed that we should take all the time we needed in order to get the kids settled and while none of us were super thrilled over it, she was right. It took time for all of us to get used to each other and move past the growing pains that came with bringing two kids into the mix. It still wasn't perfect, but it was good enough that Natalia and Steve were planning to fly up to the Tower and collect Darcy. I was planning to stay with the kids and maybe see if they want to take a ride with the horses. They'd met Voin and Nashel since they'd moved in, but they'd never gotten the chance to ride because I wasn't sure how they would react. Both of the horses had mostly recovered from their ordeals, but every now and then, they were a little unpredictable.

\--

It was thrilling to watch the kids ride, and I was happy that things were going so well. The kids took to the horses really well, which was amazing, but they'd also gotten the hang of riding faster than I would have thought. Then again, they were enhanced, and I'd gathered that their bodies weren't the only things that were better. After a few hours riding, they were both tired so I got them cleaned up and into their beds for a short nap. I asked FRIDAY to monitor them while I cleaned up the horses and made sure everyone was as they needed to be. I let the dogs out to run around and began working on a big dinner. I barely knew Darcy, but I already liked her more than I probably should. She was snarky, beautiful, and highly intelligent. It was a deadly combination, and I was considering asking Steve and Natalia how they felt about her. It was going to be amazingly awkward, but I'd been through worse.

Just as I had gotten all of the food in the oven for dinner, FRIDAY announced, "The Quinjet is landing. Steve and Natasha have asked for your help. I will keep an eye on the ovens and the kids."

"Thanks, FRIDAY."

I headed out to greet everyone and as the ramp came down, I was surprised to see Darcy curled up between Steve and Natalia. Steve noticed and whispered, "A little scared of flying. Best solution."

"I'm not offended. She aware you've landed?" I asked.

"Yeah. Come on Darcy, Bucky's here and he wants to meet you," Steve said.

She pulled her head out of the ball she was in and said, "Hi. Sorry, you have to meet me like this. I'm not normally this weird."

"Weird is normal around here and we're all afraid of something. I'm sure you have a good reason. Come, dinner's in the oven and the kids are napping," I said, smiling.

She smiled back and extricated herself from Natalia and Steve and I already knew all three of us were going to need to have a discussion. I helped Darcy bring some of her stuff in and we got her settled in one of our remaining two guest rooms. She took the one with more windows because she'd gotten used to the light at the Tower. Once she had all of her stuff in, she shooed all of us away and began unpacking. I checked on the kids to see they were still dead asleep, and I found Natalia and Steve sitting at the kitchen island. They looked at me and we all just came to an understanding, no words required. Darcy was staying here as long as she wanted and no matter what, she was ours.


	53. Chapter 53

As everyone settled at the dinner table, I noticed Darcy taking everything in. She seemed to be gathering information as we ate, and I could practically see it flowing through the algorithms she ran. It was a pro and a con of the abilities given to me by HYDRA; no one could really hide things from me anymore, but at the same time, I didn't like knowing everything. But Darcy, Steve, and Natalia were a weird exception. It also gave me superpowers as a dad. Wanda and Pietro couldn't get away with anything around me, and even if they tried, I was usually aware, and if I wasn't FRIDAY was and could thwart their plans.

After dinner, the kids and Darcy settled on the couch and started a movie, while the three of us cleaned up and made sure everything was as it should be. Once we were all settled on the couch, the movie seemed to lull me into a light doze. Not enough to be unaware of what was going on, but enough to be able to relax just a little and enjoy the family time. As the film ended, Natalia and Steve got the kids ready for bed and I followed Darcy into her room to make sure she had everything she needed and to wish her goodnight. Before I left the room, I said, "FRIDAY is going to be monitoring, and if you need anything you come get us. And don't be afraid to ask for help if you have a bad dream. They're par for the course around here, so don't feel bad. Either let FRIDAY know and she'll get one of us, or come on in and snuggle up. Natalia and I are light sleepers, and we can make room."

I noticed her cheeks pinked at the suggestion, but she nodded and said, "Alright. Now, go. It's been a long day."

I left her alone and headed up to check on the kids. They were sound asleep, night light illuminating the room just enough that I could tell they were both out like lights. I closed the door and headed up to bed, where Natalia and Steve were both curled up with books. Nat with one of her fiction books and Steve with a textbook. I rolled my eyes at his antics and settled on Natalia's other side. I whispered, "I let Darcy know she could come in here if she has any problems. She knows that Natalia and I are light sleepers."

They both nodded, not taking their eyes off their reading, and I turned to my tablet and continued making plans for my rescue. My degree was going to take some time, but I had dreams and plans and I didn't want to forget any of them. Plus, Dr. Miller had encouraged me to write things down because it allowed my brain to move on, rather than having to remember so many things. Once all of the ideas were out of my head, I put the tablet away, turned down the lights, and settled in with my own book.

\--

The door had been opened.

I had a monster crick in my neck. Ugh. Note to self: no more falling asleep with a book. My eyes fluttered open and the lights were still low, but not off. I looked and Natalia and Steve were sleeping, but both had books in their hands still. I slowly got out of bed and grabbed both books, putting them on the nightstand. When I finally glanced at the door, Darcy's figure was blocking a lot of the light. I whispered, "Come in. Don't just stand there. I told you it was fine and none of us mind."

She moved into the room, closing the door behind her. I climbed back into bed, scooting closer to Natalia to make room for Darcy. I could tell Natalia was awake, but she remained where she was so I just whispered, "Just Darcy. All safe."

She didn't reply, but I knew she had heard me because of the minute relaxation I felt in her body. Darcy still hadn't gotten into the bed and I finally whispered, "Seriously. In. Now. Stop waiting. None of us are afraid of your nightmares and we all are fine with this. Get in."

That seemed to finally get her moving, and she climbed in behind me. Once we were all settled in, I listened to Steve's deep breathing, letting it lull me back into sleep. It took a little longer than I would have liked, but I wasn't used to someone being on the outside of me. Natalia was in the middle and I was on the outside. But Darcy's quiet breath on the back of my neck did help lull me back down. Luckily I didn't have any dreams that night.

\--

Natalia was the first one up, as always, and because I slept so lightly, I was usually the second one up. I may have forgotten that Darcy was behind me so I freaked a little at the new presence in the bed. Once I realized, I calmed down and watched her for a while. Usually, I would just watch Steve, but with a new person, it was much more interesting. I did notice that she slept almost as heavily as Steve did and I could make an educated guess about the fact that she would be about as much of a martyr as Steve was about getting up. After Natalia and I both extricated ourselves from the bed, we checked on the kids and got started on breakfast. I was lucky that I didn't have class today, so I could focus on helping Darcy settle in. While we were making breakfast, Natalia asked, "Thoughts on Darcy?"

"She fits right in. Smart, snarky, beautiful, keeps up with all of us. If this were the 40's I'd be like a dog with a bone with her. But it's not and I have two stunning people who already love me. I wouldn't be offended asking her, but both of you have to be okay with it. I get the feeling Steve will love her once he gets to know her. There's a lot of Peggy in her, and he was always a sucker for curves. What about you?"

She sighed and replied, "I've never been attracted to a woman sexually before. The Red Room trained it right out of all of us. If we were attracted to anyone it could ruin a mission. Once I got out, I only ever really saw men as attractive. Plus, you and Steve are plenty for one woman. I think Darcy might be the first woman I've ever thought of as sexually attractive. Sure, plenty of women are beautiful, but I've never wanted to have sex with any of them until Darcy."

"Well," I replied, "it seems like the only hold out is Steve."

She grinned and said, "I call first dibs. I've never been with another woman and don't want you two ruining the moment."

"Steve won't be happy, but that's up to you to deal with."

Her grin turned wicked and I knew that any resistance that Darcy tried to put up wouldn't hold under the power of the Black Widow. As we finished making breakfast, the smell must have rousted Steve and Darcy because they were both making their way in, both looking adorably sleep mussed. I passed Steve his coffee while Natalia passed one to Darcy. They both settled on the barstools and just quietly drank their coffee. While they were doing that, we passed them plates of breakfast. Once they were done, Steve finally said, "Well, it was nice to have someone to wake up next to. These two are early risers."

Darcy turned an adorable shade of pink and replied, "I've been known to stay in bed as long as humanly possible."

Steve chuckled and said, "Well, at least now there's two of us."

She smiled and hopped off the stool to head upstairs. Once she was gone Steve turned to us and said, "If I wasn't in with you two, she'd be mine."

Natalia grinned and said, "I already called first dibs."

"What? That's not fair. I wasn't even here to fight!"

"You snooze, you lose, Rogers," was her accurate reply.

He sighed in defeat and moped off to the bedroom to change for classes. He had a few so he needed to get going. Natalia watched me and asked, "Do you mind dealing with the kids today? I want to show Darcy around."


	54. Chapter 54

**Natasha POV**

James had happily agreed to handle the kids today because he didn't have classes, and I was going to take Darcy around and show her everything that was on our property. For the first time in my life, that I could remember, I felt an attraction to a woman. I'd noticed women before; Pepper Potts was not one to be ignored. But for the first time that I could remember, I wanted to ravish a woman. Since Clint told us about Darcy, we'd been doing a lot of video chatting, getting to know one another. I liked Darcy when we chatted, but when I saw her for the first time at the tower, I knew something had changed because I truly noticed her beauty along with her brain. Most often, the brain came first.

James was going to be working with Wanda and Pietro on some more of their English, so I was planning on taking the horses out and showing Darcy our land. Once I was ready, I headed back down to see if Darcy was ready to go. I found her sitting on the couch, staring off into space.

"Darcy?" I asked.

She jumped a little and turned to me and said, "Mm?"

"You alright?" I replied.

"Sure. Just wondering how the hell I ended up here with three of the sexiest people I've ever seen and two of the sweetest children I've ever met. When I went and worked with Jane, I was just doing it to finish my degree. I wasn't planning on ever meeting superheroes, let alone meeting gods. So, I'm just a little overwhelmed."

I grinned at her and just said, "Sexy, hmm?"

Her eyes widened and she turned red as a tomato. She stuttered, "Oh, no. I didn't mean it like that. It's just that the three of you are unnaturally gorgeous and I'm just me."

"Gorgeous too? Wow. You should have moved in a long time ago."

"Oh god. Why can't I just shut up."

"It's alright, Darcy," I soothed, "I think you're pretty sexy too. Actually, you're the first woman in my whole life I've ever found sexy."

"Really?" she squeaked.

"Really. Come, I'll show you around and then we can see if there's anything else you need."

\--

After showing Darcy around the property that we owned, she still seemed a little overwhelmed. Her face was a study in shock, but I could also see the gears turning in her head. She seemed to be trying to take it all in and I knew that it was getting to the point where she was reaching her limit. Once the horses were back in the barn, I took her to the gym and showed her the med suite. I checked in with FRIDAY and she told me the kids and James were inside working on a puzzle and that Steve was up in his office working on homework. Darcy and I headed back in and settled in with James and the kids. It was an exercise in not just pulling Darcy into bed with me, but she fit in so well, it seemed like she had been here the whole time.


	55. Chapter 55

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pure Nat/Darcy smut here, folks. You've been warned.

Darcy had been living with us for six weeks, and it was pure torture. I'd never been afraid of sex before, but with Darcy, I didn't want to make her uncomfortable. I was terrified she was going to take it the wrong way and make things awkward. Steve and James had been so patient with me and I could tell they wanted to do something about it, but I also knew they would respect my dibs. They wouldn't get in my way until I either asked them to or they spoke to me about it. So, I decided that I was going to do something about it. I was tired of trying to determine where Darcy stood and I was tired of being scared. Black Widows didn't get scared and I wasn't going to let the fear win. I knew how to seduce anyone, and Darcy was no exception. Except for the fact that I didn't really want to seduce Darcy. I really did like her, and I wanted her to be a part of James, Steve, and I.

Darcy had told me I could hang in her room any time I wanted, so I was sitting on her bed after eating dinner when she came in. She smiled at me and I grinned back. I asked, "Darcy?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you remember what you told me when you first moved in?"

"You're going to have to be a little more specific than that, Nat. I said a lot of things when I first moved in," she replied.

"That thing about living with three of the sexiest people you'd ever seen."

Her cheeks pinked and she replied, "I don't think I'd forget that, Nat. The times when I make an ass out of myself tend to stick with me."

I grinned at her sarcasm and asked, "Did you mean it?"

"Did I-- What do you mean did I mean it?" she asked, voice incredulous.

"I mean, did you mean it? It's just a question, Darcy."

"Of course I meant it. You, Steve, and Bucky are super soldiers. Steve is the peak of human perfection, Bucky was trained to the peak of human perfection, and you are the definition of femme fatal," she replied, voice strained.

I continued grinning, getting up from the bed and approaching her. She continued to look shocked but when I grabbed her face, she seemed to finally understand and when I kissed her, she seemed shocked, but recovered quickly and kissed me back. We parted and she whispered, "Did you really mean it when you told me I was the first woman you'd ever found sexy?"

"I did," I whispered back, "And I'd like to do something about that."

"Oh."

"Oh?" I asked.

"Well, what do you want me to say?"

"I figured you would ask about Steve and James," I replied.

"Did you think I didn't put two and two together when the three of you sleep in the same bed? I'm not an idiot, Nat. If you want this with me, and Steve and Bucky are okay with this, then I'm fine."

"Steve and James are fine. They wanted you, but I called first dibs," I answered, cheeks coloring.

She stared at me and slowly, a grin fell over her face and she whispered, "Natasha Romanoff, you sly dog. Come. My bed awaits and I've been itching to get my hands on you for a while now."

I grinned and we both fell into bed, kissing. It was an interesting experience for me and I was enjoying it already. Once we were settled on the bed, I was on top and began exploring Darcy's body with slow playful touches. She was doing the same and it was hitting all of my boxes. We parted for a moment and we both pulled off our tops, revealing more flesh and bare breasts to one another. I gasped at the sight of Darcy's bare upper half and I saw her eyes widen and pupils dilate at the sight of my bare chest. She immediately grabbed on and began kissing and sucking along my neck, while I teased and dragged my hands over the new expanse of skin she'd revealed to me.

She switched her grip and began pinching my nipples while she licked and sucked, which elicited a deep moan from me. I continued searching her body and listening for the sounds she would make as I explored. She was quite vocal, which was something I always liked in my partners. Before I could really do anything, Darcy was pulling away and laying back on the bed. She whispered, "I've never really done this with a woman."

"Neither have I, really," I whispered back, breath heaving.

She grinned and said, "Well do whatever, Nat."

I raised an eyebrow and said, "Anything?"

"Anything. I get the feeling my sex life is about to become much more exciting."

I grinned and didn't reply, turning my attention to the large and very appetizing set of breasts that were on display for me. I kissed all over the large expanse of flesh, avoiding the nipple because I knew it would make Darcy crazy. Once she was writhing with want and begging for me to do more, I latched onto one of her nipples, taking the other one in my hand. I swirled my tongue over the sensitive nub of flesh and I could feel her arch into me. I bit down just a little bit and she let out a loud keen. I pulled off and then watched as the cool air of the room wrinkled and tightened the flesh. I switched to the other one and the reaction was the same. Once both nubs were tight and standing upright, I kissed down to her belly button, lingering and licking where I wanted to. I began undoing her pants, shuffling then down her thighs and grinning at the sight of the very see-through and very sexy panties she was wearing. I could see the wetness spreading and I could feel my heart speed up at the sight.

Once her pants were all the way off, I kissed up one of her legs, biting and sucking as I went. Once I reached her knee, I began trailing my hand down her thigh toward the wetness that was calling out to me. She was wriggling on the bed, but I had her in a position that she couldn't get anywhere. Each pass down her thigh I got closer to the wet mound and I knew I was making her crazy. I soon began to kiss down her thigh, coming closer and closer to her musky, wet center. When I reached her lace-cover mound, I kissed it once, getting a short taste of the wetness that was forming. I slowly removed her panties, laying her bare and loving every minute of it. After her panties were off, I kissed down from her belly button, down the smooth flesh, and into the small nest of hair that covered the fleshy nub that would send her into space. Once I reached that mound, I took a lick and it was intoxicating. Darcy let out a loud moan and I continued to lick at her wet flesh, getting to know her taste and learning the things that made her moan. As I licked, I moved a finger into place at her very wet entrance. I slid it in slowly, licking and lapping at the fluid that was leaking from her. She shivered at the entrance and I crooked my finger just right and she bowed up, keening at the sensation. As I continued to finger her, my other hand grabbed one of her nipples and twisted.

This went on for a while, and I added two more fingers along the way. She was practically putty in my hands and I could feel her walls fluttering as she prepared for orgasm. I flicked my fingers just right and she suddenly tightened up around my fingers and let out a long and loud groan. She flopped back on the bed, spent and I pulled off and said, "You taste good, Darcy."

At that, she grabbed me by the face and pulled me to her and kissed me like I was the air she needed to breathe. Before I knew it, I was on my back and she was searching me for every sensitive spot I had. She sucked on one of my nipples and brought her other hand down between my legs, teasing me with her light touches. She switched nipples, watching as my flesh pebbled in the cool air. It was a sensation I had felt before, but with Darcy, it felt different. it felt different with a woman doing this to me. I was used to the feeling of beards and large hands all over me, rather than the delicate lips and hands making their way around me. She pulled off from me and kissed around my abdomen, making a special stop at the scar that was left from the Winter Soldier. She whispered, "Still stunning."

I chuckled and said, breathlessly, "Just what Steve said."

She grinned and began sliding off my pants. I was lucky I'd decided on an easy pair of yoga pants and no panties because I knew how this was going to go. Her eyes widened at my completely bare flesh and she whispered, "Damn."

I laughed out loud and before I could come back down she was diving in. Her tongue was tracing a path from my belly button down and it felt like someone had set my nerves on fire. She licked and sucked in all the right ways and I was right at the edge when she pulled away. I flopped onto the bed and moaned, "Why?"

She just grinned and went to the top drawer of the dresser she was using. When she came back, I didn't know what she had gotten, but as soon as she placed something cold and relatively hard against me, I knew what was about to happen. She turned on the vibrator without warning and it was like a jolt to my whole self. It sent shocks everywhere and I couldn't keep the noise down. I was writhing on the bed, waiting for something to change. Finally, Darcy slid the fairly large head inside me and it was like something had let loose in me that I couldn't control. My vision practically whited out and I felt like I was high.

When I could finally open my eyes, Darcy was laying next to me, mouthing at one of my nipples. I moaned at the sensation and she pulled away and said, "Hey."

"Hi," I whispered.

"You okay?"

"More than okay," I answered, and continued, "You want Steve first or James?"

She laughed at me and said, "I don't know. I think I'll take Steve."

"Okay. FRI, tell Steve and James to go into our room and undress?" I asked.

"What?" Darcy asked.

"Well, don't you want him now?" I asked back.

She stared at me and then I saw the look of desire flare up in her eyes and she said, "Oh, yeah."


	56. Chapter 56

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More smut. Again, you have been warned.

**Steve POV**

I was working on homework in my office after the kids had gone to bed and I was just finishing up an assignment when FRIDAY asked, "Steve? Natasha has asked that you and James go to your room and undress."

My eyebrows furrowed, and I asked, "Did she say why?"

"No. But she's insisting."

"Okay," I agreed and put my papers aside. I headed up to the bedroom to find Bucky already there, laying on the bed, sporting half a hard-on. I could feel the desire light up inside me and I quickly hurried in, shut the door, and stripped. I flopped down next to him and asked, "You know what this is about?"

"Nope, but I have a feeling we'll soon find out. Let Nat know we're ready."

FRIDAY replied an affirmative and a full minute later the door swung open and instead of Nat, it was Darcy who walked in, completely naked and looking like sin. I could already see a few marks on her skin and all of the blood rushed right to my groin. She grinned and Nat followed behind her and they both looked like they'd already had a little fun. I turned to check on Bucky and his attention was riveted on Darcy. Darcy made her way over to my side of the bed and said, "Nat told me everything and while she got first dibs, I didn't want to leave either of you out. Steve first, then Bucky."

I was in complete and utter shock. Darcy rummaged through my bedside drawer and while she was doing that, Bucky whined, "Why Steve first?"

I laughed out loud and Nat answered, "Because you get me."

That shut him right up and as Darcy rolled the condom on, I knew I wasn't going to last long. She climbed up and before I could even warn her, she sank down on me and I felt like all the air had left my lungs. She was warm, wet, and very tight. I groaned as she bounced up and down, soon finding my footing and grabbing onto her hips and helping her. Once we found our rhythm, I moved up to her ample breasts and grabbed onto her nipples. She let out a gasp and soon I could hear the sounds of Nat and Bucky. I pressed my feet flat onto the mattress and began to piston in and out of Darcy's warm, wet entrance. She placed her hands on my chest, changing the angle just slightly. I noticed a delicate hand make it's way over and I grinned as Nat began pressing on Darcy's clit. Before I knew it, she was tightening up and reaching her orgasm. I wasn't far behind. Before she could do anything, I flipped us over and began to ravish her. Her lips tasted like Nat and I couldn't get enough of it. I kissed over every part of her, giving special attention to her nipples, enjoying the keening she let out. I also used a finger to press inside of her, searching for that special bundle of nerves inside of her, while pressing my thumb on her clit. She was absolutely drenched and I wanted a taste of it. I lapped at her and she shuddered and moaned, "Steve, like that, yes baby."

I grinned and continued, fingering her harder and hitting that spot inside of her with every push. Soon I could feel her flutter and tighten with orgasm and she flopped onto the bed. She was heaving for breath and I kissed my way back up and to her lips. I whispered, "Hey, Darcy."

"Hi, Steve," she whispered back.

Before I could even say anything Bucky pushed me away and settled in between Darcy's legs and I was under Nat. She pulled off the condom I was wearing and settled so that she could give me a quick blow job and I could lap at her very sensitive clit. As I lapped at her, I tasted both Bucky and Darcy on her, which only turned me on more. I shoved my tongue into her wet entrance and she let out a moan that I felt down to my toes. We both reached our climax at about the same time and I could vaguely hear Darcy begging Bucky to let her come. He was a master at keeping a woman or man right at the edge and not allowing them release. Nat settled next to me and I whispered to her, "My turn with him. Maybe you can suck him off too?"

She grinned and I turned to grab the lube. I crawled up behind Bucky and slipped a finger down to the cleft of his ass. He shivered at the sensation and I whispered, "Relax, Bucky."

I pressed a finger in and he let out a loud and deep moan. He was still holding Darcy right at the edge, and I knew he was going to do it until he was good and ready. Hopefully, Nat and I tag-teaming him would move that along. Once I was comfortable that he was good and ready for me, I pushed in with my dick and began to pick up speed. The bed was shaking just a little and I could see Nat under Bucky, and I could tell the moment she latched on to his erection because he tightened around me and let out a deep curse. In addition, I noticed Nat had an arm stretched over and I couldn't see where it was, but I knew her hand was in the vicinity of where Bucky and Darcy were joined. I finally realized what Nat was doing, when Darcy let out a deep keen and said, "Nat, yes, just like that, right there Nat, mmmm."

While I was pushing and pulling in and out of Bucky, I noticed that Nat had been a little abandoned. My arms were long enough, so I reached over and pushed two fingers into her entrance. She shivered and moaned, sending vibrations through Bucky and me. Suddenly it seemed like a race on who was going to break first. We were all rushing and letting out quite loud noise. I felt lucky that our home was quite soundproofed from room to room and the kids wouldn't wake up with all the noise we were making. Bucky decided that he wanted Darcy to be the first one to come because he picked up the pace and didn't stop. She came with a shout and a loud moan, leading to Bucky pressing back against me and tightening up when he released into Nat's mouth, which led to her tightening with release on my fingers, and then I released with a whine and a moan into Bucky.

I slowly pulled out and shoved Bucky onto his side of the bed, with Nat next to him and Darcy next to Nat so I could have my side of the room. Once we were all cleaned up, I whispered, "Welcome to us, Darcy."

She laughed and said, "Thanks, Steve. I get the feeling I'm going to be moving in here soon?"

Bucky and Nat were cuddled up together and Nat whispered, "Yeah. But leave your stuff in your room. You'll sleep in here, but we each have our own space in the house. Mine and Steve's offices and Bucky has a bedroom that's his. He'll probably turn it into an office at some point. We use the closets in those rooms for our clothes and things and just keep a couple of sets of stuff in here."

She nodded her assent and cuddled closer. She then asked, "Am I still Aunt Darcy?"

"You can be whatever you want to be. Now quiet, I'm tired," was Bucky's reply.


	57. Chapter 57

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought this was going to be my only fic without Supernatural involved, but I guess I was wrong. Not tagging because spoilers. This is Wincest, but I'm not going to be writing any smut. Not offended if you stop reading.
> 
> Canon mostly up to Season 5. The only things I'm changing are Dean's reaction to the demon blood and the powers, and how they took out Lucifer. It will all be explained two chapters from now.

**Natasha POV**

After our first night with Darcy, she became an even more integrated member of our household and we all fell more and more in love with each other. It seemed as though everything was evening out and I could finally go back to work at the PD. It was nice to return after seven months away, and I felt confident that Darcy could handle both Wanda and Pietro. Once Steve, James, and I were all at our own respective workplaces or classes, I began thinking more about having my tubes fixed. Steve had explained it to me, but I hadn't really thought about it much since then. Since Wanda and Pietro came home and adding Darcy in, things had shifted a lot for me and I wanted to be able to have a family with Steve, James, and Darcy, that came directly from me, even though I knew that it wouldn't change the way I felt about Wanda and Pietro.

One afternoon, while the kids were down for naps, I sat down with Steve, James, and Darcy, and said, "I want to have the surgery to fix my tubes."

"Hold on," Darcy interjected, "Which tubes? Because that could be a lot of things."

"My fallopian tubes," I replied, "The Red Room tied them off as a way to graduate me."

The look of horror on Darcy's face was stunning, but then she said, "I am so glad Tony and the rest are taking care of those HYDRA bastards. Because if I was powered in any sort of way, those assholes wouldn't know what hit them."

I smiled and said, "We know. Steve, can you call Dr. Gray and Bruce and have them come out here as soon as possible?"

Steve then asked, "Nat, are you ready to have kids?"

"No, Steve. I'm just ready to get this fixed. I'd like to have a wedding first and settle more into our routine with the kids. I was also thinking we could wait a little longer until they're a little older."

"You want to get married?" James asked.

"Yes, I do. Because there are four of us and two of each gender, we can work it out however we want to. I want it to be some sort of legal. I don't care how it ends up, but I want to wear a ring on my finger before we do anything with babies. Plus, I get the feeling we're going to need to add onto the house and that will take some time."

All three of them looked at me with mixed emotion, but I could tell that they were realizing that we could really make something work here. There were plenty of unexplored possibilities, and I don't think any of us had really realized it.

\--

A week later, Bruce and Dr. Gray both came out to do my surgery. Because I didn't like being completely knocked out, they were going to give me an epidural, so I wouldn't feel anything from my waist, down. I hoped there wouldn't be complications, but I was confident in both Bruce and Dr. Gray's abilities. Steve and James were going to join me in the suite, while Darcy kept an eye on the kids. FRIDAY was going to keep her appraised of all that was going on, so she didn't worry. If there was one thing I'd learned about Darcy since she moved in, it was that she was a worrier. But, I knew FRIDAY would do her job and make sure she knew what was going on.

As I lay on the bed, Steve and James on either side of me, I could hear Dr. Gray and Bruce muttering to each other. I tried to block it out, and Steve and James were helping by talking to me. It didn't take as long as I would have thought, so within the hour, the surgery was complete and they just needed to close me up. I breathed out a sigh of relief because I knew that everything was going to be better. Once I recovered, there was a possibility for me to be able to have children and that brought me more joy than I ever thought possible. 

\--

Because of my healing abilities, I was able to go back to work within a few days after my surgery, and there was a weird case sitting on my desk when I got back. It seemed as though a husband and wife were murdered, in their home, but the alarm wasn't tripped, the house was still locked up the following morning, and there was no evidence of someone having been there to commit the murder. I decided I would head over to the morgue first to get a look at the bodies and speak with the coroner. I figured they would have some answers, but when I left, I only had more questions. Both bodies had marks that matched awful torture, but their deaths were consistent with asphyxiation, not blood loss or something similar, as was normal with torture.

So, my next stop was the home of the couple, to see if I could find anything. I arrived and looked through the house to find blood everywhere in their bedroom, but otherwise, the house was undisturbed. Just as I was leaving, I heard the rumble of what I knew to be a big block engine rolling down the street. The car, a Chevy Impala, pulled in to the front of the house and two men got out. I could admit to myself that they were objectively handsome. One with bright green eyes and stunning features, and the other with long brown hair and very tall.

I finished locking up the house and they came to the porch and the shorter of the two, although he was still probably six feet tall, said, "I'm Agent Page, and this is Agent Plant. Are you the owner of the house?"

They flashed badges at me, but if I knew anything, those badges were fake. I'd stake my reputation on it. I just smiled and said, "If you two are Agents, then I'm a dancing monkey."

Both stared back at me and the same one spoke again with, "I'm sorry, what does that have to do with whether you're the owner of this home?"

"It means, that if those badges are real, then my skills are getting rusty, and my skills don't get rusty."

The staring continued and I just watched them. Neither one said anything for a while, so I decided to take pity on both of them and said, "Detective Natalie Rushman. But a few people know me as Natasha Romanoff."

I saw both of them realize who I was and their eyes widened. The taller one said, "Apologies Agent Romanoff. We really don't mean to bother you, but this case fits into a profile that we're looking into."

I stared them down and said, "So you're not Agents?"

"Not technically. We are investigators, though, and this case caught our attention."

"Any specific reason?" I asked, curious.

"Just the fact that there was no evidence of a break-in, death from asphyxiation, wounds consistent with torture, and no obvious motive from anyone around," the taller one answered.

I looked at both of them and then slowly asked, "Is there something I'm missing about this case?"

Both smiled and the shorter one took over and said, "Not necessarily missing, but just not in the know."

I raised an eyebrow and replied, "Not many people tell me I don't know something..."

They both stared back at me for a while and then seemed to realize that I was waiting for a name, and he replied, "Dean. Sorry, Dean Winchester."

"Hm. Dean Winchester. You must not know my reputation."

"Don't worry, Agent Romanoff. I know your reputation very well, but I've seen much worse than you."

I looked up at the other man and said, "And you?"

He sighed and shook his head, "Sam Winchester. This moron's younger brother. We both know of your skill Agent Romanoff. We have great respect for you. But, as Dean said, we've both faced worse and lived, so neither of us are particularly scared of you."

Huh. I don't think I'd ever met anyone who knew who I was and wasn't afraid of me. The Avengers respected me, but I also knew this was based in a healthy fear. Most SHIELD agents were terrified of me, which didn't often bother me. This was new. I appraised both of them and cataloged the things that I noticed. Both stood tall and clearly had seen some shit because they both had a look in their eyes. There was authority in them, but they both looked distinctly uncomfortable, like this was a performance. I gazed at them some more, and then said, "Well, Mr. and Mr. Winchester. You seem to think you can be of some help to me with this case. My plan was to go back to the office and work on it, but it seems to me that you two are the experts here. Do you have a place to stay in town?"

They looked at each other and I could see the silent communication passing between them. After a few minutes of mostly eyebrows and frowning, Sam said, "We don't, Agent Romanoff. We came here first thing when we got into town."

I smiled and replied, "Well then, if you both don't mind, I'd love to have you stay with me and mine while you're in town."

"You and yours?" Dean asked.

"Yes, me, my partners, and my kids."

They both seemed a little surprised, but after another moment of silent arguing they both nodded. I grabbed a piece of paper and wrote the address on it and handed it over with, "This is our address, when you arrive, just talk to the box outside the gate and you'll be let in. I'm going to get going so I can let everyone know you're coming. Sound good?"

They looked at each other again and Sam answered, "Sounds good, Agent Romanoff."

"Call me Natasha or Nat. I haven't been an Agent in a while."


	58. Chapter 58

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi.
> 
> I hope you all are doing well. I know these are crazy times, so I'm hoping that my fics can help you cope.
> 
> Much love, my dears.
> 
> PS: Russian translations are in parentheses.

**Bucky POV**

Because of my former line of work, I wasn't the type to leave my phone off. When I was in class, it was normally on vibrate, so I knew when someone texted me. I asked FRIDAY to give me a specific vibrate sequence if it was an emergency, but nothing had reached that level before. But when I was sitting in one of my classes after Natalia had her surgery, my phone vibrated in my pocket in the sequence I had requested for FRIDAY to use. I popped out of the classroom to check my phone and I saw a message from Natalia that said: _Met two odd men today, who are working with me on a case that I got today. They're going to stay at the house with us because I have a feeling about them. Let me know when you're on your way home._

I quickly replied: _**Sure. I'm in class for the next while. I should be home at my normal time. Anything I can do?**_

The reply was fast: _Nope, I'm going to run names and see what I can find._

She was fine, so I headed back into class and tried to focus, rather than thinking about the weird circumstances that had somehow hit us.

\--

By the time my classes were done, my brain was flying around with ideas and I felt as though my head was going to explode a little. So many thoughts ran through my head and I was overwhelmed trying to deal with them and make sure I was clear-headed for this meeting. I made it home in record time and found Natalia, Darcy, and the kids on the couch. I kissed all four of them, happy to see them doing okay. I settled all my stuff in my room and grabbed a quick shower just to wash off the day and the funk of other people and animals. Once that was done, I headed back down to sit with everyone and I asked, "Find anything?"

"Yeah, but I get the feeling there's more to it than what's there. I'm not sure these guys are as they seem on paper, and I don't think that they are criminals, if that makes you feel any better."

"It does. Steve home?" I continued.

"On his way now," Darcy replied.

I nodded and got up to work on dinner, keeping in mind that there might be more people joining us. I decided on stew, as January in Pennsylvania is perfect stew weather. While that was going, Steve arrived home, looking flustered and trying not to appear stressed. He bustled through the kitchen and I stopped him to say, "Hey, calm down. Natalia thinks they're fine, and if they're not, we can defend ourselves. Alright?"

He took a deep breath and replied, "Yeah. I know. It's just odd for us to have people over that we don't know. I don't know how to feel about it."

"Do you trust Natalia's gut?" I asked.

"Yeah I do."

"Then everything will be fine."

He nodded and hurried upstairs to get himself settled. Just as he left, FRIDAY's voice said, "An Impala has just approached the gate. They're permitted entry?"

I didn't reply, but I could hear Natalia answer, "Yeah. Tell them that any weapons should not be brought into the house, and if they feel the need to carry, a small knife is all we will allow."

FRIDAY affirmed and I heard Darcy get the kids and move to the front porch. Natalia came into the kitchen and checked on me, asking, "Steve?"

"Upstairs, getting settled. I'm sure FRIDAY let him know and he should be down in a moment."

As I finished, speak of the devil, Steve was running down, saying, "Sorry. I'm here. Let's meet these guys. Did you tell them anything?"

"Other than who I was? No," she answered.

Steve smiled and we all headed out as a beautiful car pulled up into our driveway. It was clear that this car was well-loved and treated with the utmost respect. When the two men exited the car, my eyes widened at their large stature. Both men were taller than me by a lot and the taller of the two men topped Steve by just a little. They were both dressed in jeans and flannels, but there was something about them that made me settle into a more protective stance. While these two men may look casual, it was clear to me that when they wanted to be, they could be deadly.

They approached the porch steps and the shorter one asked, "So, Natasha. This is your home?"

I noticed the smile on her face as she replied, "It is, and these are my partners and my children. Steve, James, Darcy, Wanda, and Pietro."

The two of them looked at all of us and Steve was the first to break the silence with, "It's nice to meet you guys. Nat didn't really tell us anything about why she invited you over, but I assume it has something to do with a case she's working on?"

The two smiled and the taller one said, "It does, but I think you all should be sitting down for that discussion. Why don't we get our bags and we can all talk."

Natalia was the one in charge and she asked, "The kids?"

"That's up to you," the green-eyed one replied.

She paused and I could see the thought process flowing through her head. It was clear she didn't want the kids involved in her work life, but I could also tell that she didn't want to exclude them. She finally answered, "Ванда, Пьетро, поднимитесь наверх и поиграйте немного, чтобы мы могли поговорить. FRIDAY получит вас, когда придет время обедать или мы закончим, в зависимости от того, что наступит раньше." (Wanda, Pietro, go upstairs and play for a little while so we can talk. FRIDAY will let you know when dinner is ready or we finish talking, whichever comes first.)

The two of them looked disappointed, but listened to Natalia and headed up to their room. We invited the two men into the living room and we all settled in for what was certain to be a strange discussion.


	59. Chapter 59

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoilers for SPN up to Season 5.

We were all staring at each other and it was clear that none of us really knew where to begin. Natalia, never being one to cow to fear, broke the silence with, "Do you want me to explain what I know, and then you can fill in the blanks, or should you start?"

They glanced at each other and the taller of the two said, "I think we should explain because it is a complicated and kind of unbelievable story. But I get the feeling you all might be just the people to be understanding about this."

Before he could continue, I interrupted with, "What gave you that impression?"

The man smiled at me and replied, "Well, first of all, if Natasha is an Avenger, then she knows some of the shit that's out there in the world. Plus, based on my own knowledge and a few inferences, I know that none of you are normal."

I raised an eyebrow and replied, "How are we not normal?"

The grin on his face was unrepentant as he pointed to each of us and listed, "Super soldier froze in ice for seventy years who used to look like the American flag threw up on him; said super soldier's best friend who fell from a train in the Swiss Alps, but was kept alive by a Nazi organization, given a metal arm, and brainwashed into killing people for seventy years, who was rescued by said best friend and Natasha here, and the woman who worked with Thor to save the world. James, neither of us are stupid and neither of us are unfamiliar with the goings-on in the world."

I could feel the shock in the room, and Steve broke the silence with, "So what is it that you think we might be able to understand?"

"Well, my name is Sam Winchester, and this is my older brother Dean. You know the expression 'making a deal with the devil'?"

We all glanced at each other and then nodded at the odd question, and Sam continued, "Well, it's not entirely impossible. My mother made a deal with a demon in order to save my Dad's life, years before Dean or I were even born. But this demon had more in mind and ten years later when he came to collect her soul, he made a statement. Enough of one that my dad became obsessed with finding the thing that killed her. On the night my mom died the demon dripped a few drops of his blood into me, which gave me abilities that only began manifesting when I was a lot older. For the first seventeen and a half years of my life, we never lived in one place longer than a few months. My dad dragged Dean and me all over the US to try and kill every evil thing on the path to getting revenge for my mom. When I was finished with high school, I was done hunting. I moved to California and went to Stanford for a few years, but one night, my brother showed up and told me that my dad had gone missing. So, reluctantly I agreed to go on one hunt. When I came back, I found my girlfriend Jessica in the same position as my mom; burning on the ceiling. So, I went back to hunting full time with Dean. While we were hunting together, I began to have prophetic dreams and visions of things that were going to happen. I didn't know what was causing it, but I would find out.

"Most people don't know, but there are all sorts of Supernatural creatures out there. Any urban legend you've ever heard of, or any monster that people know about, along with many other things, are real, alive, and are generally bad news. There is a community of people who work to kill and contain these monsters, called Hunters. After my brother saved my life from the burning apartment where Jess and I lived, we were on the road together looking for my dad. After a year, we found him, but got into an awful car accident, facilitated by a demon. Dean was comatose and it looked like he wasn't going to make it, so my dad sold his soul to the same demon who killed our mom, in order to save Dean's life. But, rather than 10 years like most people get when they sell their soul, he got minutes. He said goodbye and fell to the floor, dead. After that, we were desperate to find the demon and end all of this mess, but we still continued to hunt for the things that were hurting people. Another year passed by like that and then I was kidnapped and brought to Cold Oak, South Dakota. Turns out I wasn't the only one who had been fed demon blood as a child. Cold Oak was filled with people who had the same thing happen to them. At six months, their mothers burned on the ceilings of their nurseries. All of us had been fed a few drops of the demon's blood, and it gave us abilities. Mine were visions and a little telekinesis. Cold Oak was basically a glorified cage match. Whoever came out on top would be the one to unleash a hoard of demons on the world. It was down to two of us, me and a young man with super strength. I thought I had knocked him out and was leaving when my brother and our friend Bobby showed up. Because I was distracted, I didn't notice the other man get up, and he stabbed me in the back, severing my spinal cord. I died that night, and Jake was declared the winner.

"But, my brother couldn't live without me, so he sold his soul for me; again, rather than the normal 10 years most folks get, he got a year to live. Once I was back in the land of the living, we went to a cowboy cemetery in Wyoming, where there was a devil's gate that Jake was going to open. We ended up killing the demon, whose name was Azazel, and Jake, but not before the gate was opened and thousands of demons were released. Over the course of the next year we hunted things like normal, but we also ran into a lot more demons than we were used to. As Dean's deal came closer and closer, we found out who held the contract, a demon named Lillith. On the night my brother's contract was up, we tried to ambush and kill Lillith, but it didn't work and the hellhounds still took my brother away.

"There were a lot of things that we didn't know about at that time, and one of them was that both of us were being manipulated for something much worse. When Dean was down in hell, he was tortured for thirty years. He held out under the worst abuse you can imagine, but he did break, and for ten years, he became the torturer. But once he broke, the Angels rescued him. We're not sure how long it took them to actually get to Dean, but he was down in hell for about forty years, which up here is only four months. While Dean was down there, I was beside myself. I was the perfect target for manipulation. A demon, Ruby, told me that I could take out Lillith. She was the one who killed my brother and I wanted her dead. But, Ruby was manipulating me, and one of the ways she did it was getting me addicted to demon blood. Because of the drops from Azazel, I had abilities, but I struggled to tap into them. When I was drinking Ruby's blood, I could exorcise demons with a thought, and after a while even kill them.

"But four months after he died, my brother was brought back to life by the angel Castiel, the Angel of Thursday. We began hunting together and I was still drinking Ruby's blood. Dean had never been thrilled with the idea of me having abilities, but he was pretty accepting of that fact. He wasn't super thrilled with the idea that I was drinking demon blood, and he sure let me know. But I didn't care. I was more powerful than I'd ever been and I was going to kill Lillith even if it was the last thing I did. We also discovered that when Dean was down in hell, he set in motion the Judeo-Christian apocalypse, as predicted in Revelation. He, the Righteous Man, shed blood in Hell, which began the process. He broke the first 'seal' on the cage that held Lucifer. There were 666 seals in total, but only 66 needed to be broken in order to free him. The first one, Dean took care of, 64 more of them were taken care of by demons and angels, we presume, and I took care of the final one. Ruby was manipulating me to kill Lillith because it was the final seal on Lucifer's cage. I released the devil on the world.

"But, we soon discovered that Heaven and Hell were in cahoots to start this thing up and Dean and I had an even more fucked up destiny in the whole thing. When angels and demons leave Heaven and Hell, they are required to take someone's form. For a demon, it's as simple as smoking into someone, no permission needed. Unless you're warded, you're wide open to demon possession. Angels are a little more tricky because they actually need your permission to possess you. Lucifer, while he is known as the father of Demons, is actually an Archangel, so he needed permission in order to possess someone. But, he couldn't just possess anyone, he and his brother Michael, who were supposed to bring the end of days with their fight, needed very specific vessels, because they were archangels. Any other vessel would crack under the strain of carrying an archangel with them. It just so happens that Michael and Lucifer were destined to possess Dean and me, respectively. We each displayed some of the characteristics consistent with the archangels, and so we were meant to be their vessels and one of us would kill the other. Neither of us were willing to play angel condom, so we both refused. We got a solution to the apocalypse from Gabriel, also an archangel. The only option we had was to get the rings of the Four Horseman, which formed a lock on Lucifer's cage in hell, open the cage, and put Lucifer back in there.

"When I killed Lillith, I was very much hopped up on Demon blood, and I was pretty close to becoming a demon myself. I was also highly addicted to the stuff. Once I was detoxed, I thought my powers were gone. I convinced myself that I was normal, even though I truly knew I was anything but. When we got our solution from Gabriel, I realized that my powers were an advantage. Ruby told me on the night that I released Lucifer that I was like Dumbo and that I didn't need the feather to fly. She was very right. Dean, myself, Castiel, and our friend Bobby all worked together and put Lucifer back into his cage. Once that was done, G-d finally intervened and brought all of the angels, except Castiel, home and closed up Heaven so the angels couldn't mess with us anymore. We allied with a crossroads demon by the name of Crowley during the Apocalypse, and because of Lucifer's defeat, and because none of the Princes of Hell wanted the job, he took over as King of Hell and closed all of the gates to hell, unless someone summoned a demon specifically to make a deal. So, for the last couple of years or so, Dean and I have been hunting and we came across this case, which led us to you."

My jaw was hanging open and I knew my eyes were the size of saucers. They looked at each other and Dean asked Sam, "Should we tell them about the other thing?"

"I don't know. They seem like they would be accepting; I mean, they are in a polygamous relationship."

Dean grinned and continued, "Also, Sam and I are a couple. Because of how we grew up, I think it was kind of inevitable that we would fall in love with each other, and during the Apocalypse, we found out that we were soulmates. So, the two of us have filthy, nasty, amazing, incestuous, sex."

I glanced at Steve and I could see the light flush on his cheeks and when I checked on Natalia and Darcy they both were red, but for a whole other set of reasons. I blurted out, "Natalia, Darcy, you're not allowed."

They both looked at me and Darcy whined, "But Bucky!"

"No. Not allowed."

She sighed and pouted, while Natalia broke the silence with, "So when I got home, I had FRIDAY run your names and your records are quite unique."

"Who's FRIDAY?" Dean asked.

"That would be me," she answered.

Both of them startled and looked around the room. Sam's eyes widened and he asked, "Is she an AI?"

Natalia nodded and replied, "Courtesy of Tony Stark."

Both of their eyes went wide, and they looked around the room again, eyes scanning for sensors and the like. Natalia got them back on track with, "So your records are pretty interesting."

Dean grinned at her, and if I didn't know he was in a relationship I would have growled at him for the way he was looking at Natalia. I flicked my eyes over to Sam and he was watching me and when he noticed, he gave me a sympathetic smile and mouthed, _Later_. I nodded and Dean spoke with, "Yeah, a hunter's life isn't legal, and most of the stuff we do can often look like bad things. For example, most of the monsters that we hunt look human and act human most of the time, they just require a special diet or they have additional parts, so when we have to take out these monsters, it can look like cold-blooded murder.

"Plus, to take out ghosts, it requires a little grave desecration here and there, along with a little B&E. We also don't get paid for what we do, so hustling, stealing, and fraud are often the name of the game. Sam and I have been able to work around a few of those issues recently, but for most of our adult lives that is how we've had to live, and that racks up a rap sheet, no matter how discreet you are."


	60. Chapter 60

**Natasha POV**

After hearing what the brothers Winchester had to say, I was glad about two things. One was that the kids were upstairs, and the other was that I had let them explain their lives because if I hadn't I'm not sure I would have believed them. When Dean finished speaking I asked, "So what brought you to town?"

"Your case, Natasha," Sam said, the 'duh' in his voice unmistakable.

"Thank you, genius," I replied, "I meant, what creature?"

"A ghost, we think. We're not sure of much else, but the crime scene and the bodies are consistent with a ghost," Sam answered.

Before I could even say anything, James broke the silence with, "How?"

"How what?"

"How could a ghost be consistent?" he asked.

Sam looked to Dean and they had another one of their silent arguments. After a few moments, Dean continued with, "Well, ghosts are often stuck in a cycle. They didn't go with their Reaper when they died, so now they're stuck here. They can have good intentions, but after a while, they will go bad, no matter who they were in life. When that does happen, their kills will often fit a profile specific to them, but there are things that can be generalized to all ghosts. For example, the lack of entry or exit of the house. A ghost doesn't need to be let in or out of anywhere, so often locked doors stay that way; same with windows. Ghosts also tend to fuck electronics, so alarms tend to fail. And with no fingerprints, you see evidence of someone having been there, but you can't find traces of anyone. Natasha, did you find anything at the home of the couple?"

I took in his answer with a critical eye and then answered, "No. Other than the blood everywhere in their bedroom, there were no signs that someone had been there at all. If I hadn't seen their bodies and the blood, I would have thought nothing was wrong."

"That fits with our pattern. The only way we can really confirm it is to get into the house and run a check for EMF," Dean added.

"EMF?" Steve asked.

"Electromagnetic frequencies; ghost's emit them like it's their job, and even after they've caused someone's death, they can still often be found at the scene," Sam explained.

"Huh. The more you know," Darcy muttered.

Sam and Dean both chuckled.

Before any of us could say anything, FRIDAY's voice interrupted with, "James, I believe your stew is done."

James smiled and said, "Well, it's a good thing we finished talking. Get the kids and we'll have dinner."


	61. Chapter 61

**Bucky POV**

As dinner was being eaten, I was still processing everything the Winchesters had said, and to be honest, I wasn't surprised. As much as I was a believer in science and logic, there were some things that just couldn't be explained. If anything, their explanation was thorough and without doubt from either of them. While we were eating, I watched them, and I realized what they had together was truly something special. It seemed they could almost anticipate the other and it led to them looking so in sync it was kind of freaky. But as dinner wound down, Sam got up and turned to watch the snow with a beer in his hand. Everyone, Dean especially, looked a little concerned. I took it upon myself to go and check on him because I knew, based on some general inferences, that he and I were quite similar.

I approached, making sure to scuff my feet so I wouldn't scare him. He turned and a small smile made its way to his face. He murmured, "Did Dean send you over to check on me?"

"Not really, but his face is like a beacon of concern, and I figured you already told me you wanted to talk to me later, and it's later, so why not?"

His smile grew a little and he replied, "Makes sense. What I wanted to tell you was that Dean flirts as he breathes. I'm confident enough in my relationship with him to let him do it and not feel concerned. We've been together for almost six years and he hasn't slept with anyone but me since. It's just a part of who he is. Don't worry about his flirting with Natasha or Darcy, or even Steve. He's not picky about gender. It's just the way he interacts with the world, and plus, none of you are bad looking."

I smiled and said, "Thanks for telling me. If I didn't know that, I might have had to make him realize that Natalia is mine, or ours, rather."

He nodded and we stood there, shoulder to shoulder, or more like shoulder to bicep because he was so damn tall, and just watched the snow fall around us. As I reflected on everything I just learned, I asked, "Ever think about getting out?"

Sam chuckled and said, "All the time. All the damn time. But Dean has been a hunter all his life, and I don't think he would be able to give it up. If he doesn't, then I don't, because I know for certain that if he was to go hunting on his own, he'd be dead pretty soon, and since there's no more apocalypse, there's no chance he'd come back. So I stay with him to keep him safe."

"Well," I continued, "Whenever you feel like being done, give us a call, and we'll see what we can do.

He stared at me for a long time and then asked, "Why?"

"Why what?" I asked.

"Why make that offer?"

"Because I see a lot of all of us in you and Dean. We all need to get out some time, and the four of us have found our peace. Why not extend that to others? We have plenty of resources to help you out and I think you and Dean deserve it. Plus, I know a soldier when I see one, and while you and Dean haven't fought any traditional wars, sometimes a soldier needs to lay down their arms and come home. That's what Steve and Natalia did for me, and I figure it's my turn to pay it forward a little."

"Wow, James—"

"Bucky. Only Natalia and FRIDAY call me James, and if I could convince both of them to stop, they would."

"Bucky then," Sam continued, "I can't thank you enough for the offer."

"It's no skin off my nose, Sam. You're a good man, and I get the feeling you might just fit in here."

The smile on his face made him look about five years younger. I clapped my hand on his shoulder and walked away, giving him some time to think about it. I walked back into the dining room to find all eyes on me. I said, "He's fine. Just thinking."

Dean watched me and asked, "Anything I need to know?"

"I think Sam spoke to me with the intent of not having me share anything. But I'll tell you this: do you love your brother?"

Dean was indignant, "Of course I do!"

"Then talk to him. I see a lot of all of us in both of you and the only way we've been able to make this work is communication."

He looked stricken for a moment and then muttered, "We Winchesters aren't much for sharing our feelings."

"Suck it up, buttercup. That's a part of life. I think it's time that policy changed, but that's up to you. Now, I'm going to bring in all the dishes and get started on that, Darcy and Natalia are going to get the kids settled with a movie, Steve is going to help me with the dishes, and you are going to go and get your's and your brother's things and bring them inside. FRIDAY will show you the way."


	62. Chapter 62

**Steve POV**

After everyone was settled in for the night, the four of us were in bed and I just asked, "Thoughts?"

Nat smiled and said, "I like them."

Darcy nodded her agreement and I looked to Bucky and he said, "I think they're good people. I also think they've both reached their end with what they do. We have the resources to offer them some help, and I think we should. I also think since we have space, why not build them something of their own. My gut tells me the closest thing to a home either of them has ever had is that Impala. I also get the feeling we don't want the house crowded with people, and if we're going to have some babies, I think we should get them their own space. Plus, it's an excuse to add to the house while the builders are here. I told Sam, and I think I'm right, that at some point, all soldiers need to lay down their weapons. These guys have been soldiers in a war that no one knows about for their whole lives. We should pay it forward, no?"

I smiled at Bucky's answer and said, "I agree. FRIDAY? Can you wipe any criminal records for the Winchesters? And begin working on creating viable identities for both of them? Same names and DOB's, but find a way to get them records with Spec Ops; also, not as brothers. They seem to have a cover, but this one needs to be airtight."

"Of course, Steve. I've also taken the liberty of reaching out to Mr. Stark to see if he would be willing to offer some funds to help the Winchesters."

"Don't do that, FRIDAY," Bucky interrupted, "I have a solution to that, and I think everyone will find it satisfactory. I don't want Stark involved until they're more settled."

"Of course, James."

We all looked at each other, knowing that things were going to change, but somehow, we were all okay with that. If anything, we were adaptable enough to handle it.

\--

The following morning, I stumbled into the kitchen to find Dean sitting with a cup of coffee. He had a haunted look in his eyes and I could see they were red and puffy from crying. I grabbed my own cup and sat next to him and we just enjoyed the early morning quiet. I had a few classes today, and I was sure Nat was going to go with the Winchesters to the house to check it out. As I was just about to leave, Dean broke the silence with, "Steve?"

"Yes?"

"What made you decide to get out?"

"The realization that I had fought my war and so many others and it was time for me to give someone else the mantle. It was time for me to live in the world I'd died for and maybe take a chance to find out who I could be in a world I never expected to see. I was tired, Dean. Damn tired. While I might be as physically fit as ever, my emotional health was in the toilet and I needed to be willing to take the time to address that. Seeing Bucky recover made me realize that I didn't want that to be my life. I wanted to be in the army so I could fight for my country. I did that. It was time for me to lay down my weapon. I knew who I was as Captain America, but Steven Grant Rogers had been put on hold the moment I agreed to be an experiment. Steven Grant Rogers was still stuck in a body that didn't work right, and with a major chip on his shoulder. Seventy years later, I finally thought it time to give that stupid kid who didn't know any better a chance to breathe and see the world."

Dean looked at me for a while and then just whispered, "Thanks."

"No worries, Dean. I'm not going to be around much today, but if you need anything, I'll do what I can."


	63. Chapter 63

**Darcy POV**

While Nat, Sam, and Dean were at the crime scene, and Steve and Bucky were in classes, I took the time to start working on designs for Sam and Dean's house. It was exciting and I was looking forward to seeing their faces. FRIDAY was helping me out and giving me what insight she could into Sam and Dean as people, so I could translate it into their home. I could tell Sam was a bookworm, so I added a full library to the plans, and the moment I saw that Impala, I knew Dean was a gear-head, so I added on a fully stocked garage for him. I gave them two extra bedrooms in addition to the master, so if they needed it, they had the room. Their kitchen was state of the art in every way possible, and their living spaces were warm and cozy. From what I could gather, neither one of them was used to a permanent place, so I did my best to make sure it was as inviting as possible.

As the day flew by, Nat, Sam, and Dean arrived home first, and I could see the weariness in all of them, though less so in Nat. When I checked in, Nat said, "Just a hard day. We're going to go out tonight to take care of it, so I'm going to snag a few hours rest. Sam and Dean are going to do the same. Wake us up when it's dinner time and we'll come eat."

I nodded as she kissed Wanda and Pietro on the heads. They had both grown so much since I had met them and it was getting a little overwhelming for me. But I loved them like they were my own and I would treat them as such until the day I died.

\--

After dinner was eaten, and dishes washed, we all settled into the living room and watched TV for a while. It was relaxing for all, and we all got a chance to just exist. Dean was excellent with the kids and watching them interact was a beautiful sight. Sam was a little less sure of himself, but I think he would soon get more comfortable. The kids seemed enamored with both of them and I guess it might have been because they were the first people that they met who weren't family or the Avengers. It was adorable watching the four of them find their equilibrium, and if I wasn't in a very happy relationship, I would have climbed either of them like a tree.

I could tell that Sam and Wanda were going to be close, their mutual powers bringing them together. Sam had been showing Wanda little things she could do with her powers and watching her eyes light up was a gift. She seemed to be thrilled to be under Sam's wise tutelage and I was thrilled there was someone who could help her where we couldn't with her powers.

As the sun finally went all the way down, the kids were sent up to bed, and Sam, Dean, and Nat prepared to leave. Once everything was loaded up, we all passed hugs around, sending good luck and safety their way. Bucky, Steve, and I settled into the bed and I showed them the progress I had made on the designs for their house. I also asked FRIDAY, "Can you see what you can find out about Sam's schooling? I have a feeling that even if he has no formal education in it, he could get a Doctorate in Religious Studies before I even blinked."

"Of course, Darcy. Would you like me to do the same for Dean?"

"I don't know. I can't get a read on him. If anything, look into engineering programs at local community colleges; I don't know much, but based on how good that Impala looks, I get the feeling that Dean has a good head for mechanics. We'll see."

FRIDAY agreed as she always does, and I got back to working with Steve and Bucky on the designs.

\--

Late into the night, we were all still awake with nerves, when finally FRIDAY informed us, "It seems as though the Winchesters and Natasha are back. I can't exactly tell about injuries, but everyone seems to be in good spirits."

We all let out audible sighs of relief and settled in to wait. Once they were all in, Sam and Dean headed right to their room to grab showers and settle in, but I could see something was nagging at Nat.

I asked, "What's up?"

"I don't know. I've never met anyone like the two of them and I can't seem to figure it out. They work together better than anyone I've ever known, and if I hadn't known what was going on, I would have thought them crazy. But I know what's going on, and I think they're among the true heroes of the world. I mean, we did what we did for our own reasons, but Sam and Dean don't get the accolades that come with being superheroes. They just do it because they can and they know how. I find that pretty remarkable."

I smiled and replied, "Yeah, that is pretty remarkable. And that's why, when they leave, we're going to build them a gorgeous house so they can have a place to rest. They deserve it more than anyone else I know."

She nodded her agreement and fell into bed with us. We all settled in and the night was finally quiet.


	64. Chapter 64

**Steve POV**

We saw the Winchesters off as a family the following morning, telling them that if they ever needed anything at all to please call us and ask. They seemed a little uncomfortable about it, but I gathered that they weren't the type to take gifts well. Our routine settled back into normal after sending them off, and even though it was January, the homestead still needed constant work, so I headed out to do that.

While I was out there, my phone vibrated with a text. I checked it to see a message from Bucky: _When you go to class tomorrow, can you check with the Dean about Sam and his qualifications? I really think he might be a great candidate for a doctorate or Ph.D., and after that, a teaching position._

I replied: _I'll look into it. If there's nothing we can do without an undergrad, we can fudge that, no problem._

There was no response, but I figured he had other things to take care of.

\--

Five months flew by and we were celebrating the year anniversary of having Wanda and Pietro join our family. In that time we'd done a lot. Bucky and I were both going into our second year of medical and veterinary school, and both of us were loving it. The kids were settled, Darcy was thrilled, and Nat was loving her job, still. Additionally, we had been working hard on a design for the Winchester's house, and it had finally been built and completed. The builders worked through the tough winter months, but Tony paid them very well for what they did, so they didn't have much to complain about. While we were working on the new house, we added a whole new wing onto the house. Mostly it was some additional bedrooms and a few more bathrooms, but one of the bathrooms had a tub that both Nat and Darcy approved of, and both knew that if (or when) we decided to have kids, they would both give birth there, rather than in the med suite or our bedroom.

The Winchesters had actually called us recently, letting us know they were going to come by for a visit. We all got very excited and the day they arrived, all of us were jumping out of our seats. When FRIDAY finally alerted us they had pulled up, we all ran out to greet them. They got out of the Impala and were both moving a little gingerly, but both looked happier than the last time we'd seen them. We passed hugs around and brought them into the house. They settled in with the kids and we just chatted. As the day wore on, Wanda and Pietro were send up for naps (most would have thought them too old to be taking naps, but with their enhancements, they got tired fast, and they needed the sleep to help them replenish their energy). When they were all settled in, I finally was able to ask, "What's up with you two? You look better than when you left here last."

They looked at each other and Dean spoke, "I thought more and more about what you said, Steve, and you were right. We fought our war, our destiny, and it was long past time for us to lay down our weapons. So, Sam and I spent a month at our friend Bobby's house, wrapping up outstanding things, and making sure that we were able to have a clean break. I cleaned out Baby's trunk, Sam gathered a complete replica of Bobby's library, because if Bobby is anything, he's paranoid. We cleared out every storage unit our dad took out and made sure that any objects were dealt with accordingly. Additionally, we made sure to burn any cards or identities that we didn't want again, and told Bobby not to have anyone contact us unless it was an absolute emergency."

Sam's face was an exercise in unrepentant joy, and he continued, "After we were done at Bobby's we took our time getting here, making pit stops wherever we wanted. We stopped in Palo Alto, so I could say my final goodbye to Jess and let her go, we stopped a few other important places to us, and then we made our way here. We were wondering if you'd be willing to let us stay with you for a while, so we can get on our feet."

The four of us had silly grins on our faces and I said, "Come with us. We're going to take the golf cart, but you can follow in the Impala."

They both looked confused but accepting of the weird request, so they headed out to their car and the four of us settled into the golf cart. We bought one because our property was so large that it was hard to traverse on foot, and the horses weren't always so happy to make the trek. So, a golf cart it was. We drove over to the house, the rumble of the Impala signifying that they were with us. We arrived before Sam and Dean and all of us couldn't keep the grins off our faces. When Sam and Dean pulled up in the Impala, both of them had wide eyes.

They got out and Dean asked, "What's this?"

"Come," Darcy instructed, "You'll see."

We walked in and both of them gasped a little. Their foyer was large and grand, but also warm and welcoming because we knew that the Winchesters were simple people who didn't need a lot. The floors throughout the house were deep, dark wood, and all of the walls in the main living areas were painted a simple dove grey. The place was light, airy, and beautiful, perfect for a pair of men who hadn't ever had a home in their lives. Off the foyer on the left was a huge open room that was connected to the kitchen, so they could entertain as they wanted to. We hadn't put in any furniture because we knew that they probably had their own tastes. Off the foyer on the right was a smaller living space, that could be used more for formal entertaining. We added in a nice bar cart there, that Tony himself had stocked with some of the best liquors out there.

The kitchen was state of the art in every way possible. Appliances were brand new, cabinets were dark to match the floor, and the countertops were a stunning granite that Tony had custom ordered. It was black, with flecks of every color in it, but subtle enough that it didn't look like a rainbow threw up on it. The backsplash was subway tile, but rather than white, we went with a grey that was similar to the paint color. We stocked their refrigerator for them, along with giving them everything they needed for their kitchen, courtesy of Tony. Because we were using his people, we had to tell him something about the Winchesters so we explained they were friends who needed a place and we were going to build it on our land. Even though we didn't want him to, he insisted on helping. So, we allowed him to buy a whole new kitchen for them and the bar cart in the formal living room. In the regular living room, we had also installed a nice wet bar, so when they wanted, they could mix drinks.

When back in the foyer, there was a hallway that led to the back of the house where there was another space to entertain, this one with one wall that was all windows. It let the warm light into the room and it was a great place to hang out when the sun was going down. It also led to the large deck we'd installed and the complete outdoor entertaining space. There wasn't furniture here either because we didn't want to presume. Throughout showing them all of this the Winchesters had gobsmacked expressions on their faces. Neither one of them could say a word through their shock, and we couldn't keep the grins off our faces.

Once we were done with the first floor, we headed up the stairs that started near the foyer and showed them the two bedrooms that were meant for guests, along with the library. I had been the one to work on the library, mostly, keeping it simple with bookcases on every wall available, along with a big table and a rolling ladder for easy access. This was a very special room in the house because its walls were taller than most other places. The bookcases made it hard to install windows, so we just decided to make the walls a little taller and install the windows above the height of the bookcases. Sam's eyes nearly bugged out of his head when he saw the room and I was thrilled.

Moving up to the third floor, that's where the master suite and bathroom were. We used the entire floor to make them a luxury suite that would treat them as they deserve. The walls were a deeper grey up here, and their bed was custom ordered like ours was, made to be able to fit two men over six feet tall. Just as with on the first floor, one of the walls was all windows, letting in a ton of natural light. On the side of the room that didn't have the bed, we created a small sitting area, so they would have somewhere to enjoy the view, rather than just from the bed. The bathroom was also a masterpiece. It was all slate tile on the floors, the same deep grey on the walls, a state of the art shower and tub, and a double sink vanity.

When we got them back down to the first floor, we took them to a door that was past the staircase leading up to the second floor and showed them down to the basement. It was completely finished and it was like a den, with a small kitchenette, a smaller, but no less amazing bathroom, and a couch that if needed, could pull out into a big bed, also custom ordered. The basement was meant to be a more private space for them, so they didn't always need to be upstairs. Once that was done, we went to the final doorway, on the same side of the house as the more formal living room, and showed them the huge garage. There was plenty of room for Baby in there, along with every tool a mechanic could ever need. We trusted Tony with that because he would know better than anyone else. Dean's eyes were the size of saucers and he looked as though he was going to die.

We got them both back up to the main floor and settled down in the kitchen. Sam and Dean were staring at all of us and finally, Sam said, "Who is this for?"

"Wow, I thought you were the smart one, Sam," Bucky replied, as I tossed him a set of keys.

"For us?" he asked.

"Of course. You two deserve it. The house is completely protected too. FRIDAY may or may not have hacked into your phones when you were here and we got Bobby's number. We called immediately after you left, but he told us that he knew you were coming to him, so he called us after you left. He gave us all the information we could want on how to protect the house and he gave us some detailed plans for his panic room, and we modified them and made your entire basement into one. Should you need it, the basement is a safe place for you to go."

Both of their faces were studies in shock, and Sam asked, "How are we going to afford this?"

"Free of charge," Nat replied, "We built this for you and we're not going to make you pay for it. You deserve it more than anyone else we've ever known."

Bucky picked up where she left off with, "And, after I escaped from HYDRA, one of the first things I did when I had my wits about me was drain them dry in every way I could. I hacked into every bank account that I knew about and took it all, and then I went to every base I knew that was on US soil and took every dollar and any other currency that was there. It amounted to a lot of money, enough to support all four of us for a few lifetimes, so you two are going to get to spend a goodly portion of HYDRA's money on making a new life for yourselves."

Again, both of them stared at us in shock. Darcy decided to pop in with, "FRIDAY is also installed in the house and she can help you with anything and everything you need. Tony was a bit of an asshole about it, but we figured it would be nice for you to have some help. He kitted out your kitchen for you as well, in addition to the bar cart in the other room, and Dean's garage."

"Guys, we can't," Dean argued.

"You can, and you will, or are you going to argue with three super soldiers and someone who's friends with the god of Thunder?" Nat asked.

They both quieted and seemed to think about it for a moment. Following that they both sighed and while they may not have said anything, we all knew they'd admitted defeat. Bucky jumped in again with, "Sam, whenever you want come see me. I have something to talk to you about."

"Sure, man. I'll come by at some point."

"Ask FRIDAY to order anything you want and tell her to take it from the account James indicated to her," Nat added.

They nodded and I said, "We're going to leave you two alone now and come by whenever you want to. Also, if it's all right with you, FRIDAY is going to run some medical scans while you're settling in, just to see if there's anything we can do to help you. When you get settled in, we'll show you the gym and med suite."

Again, all we got was nods, so we made our way out and left them alone.


	65. Chapter 65

**Bucky POV**

It took the Winchesters about a week to realize that we weren't kidding about the house. They slept there, but they spent a lot of their time in our house with us. Once the week was up, and we'd all had conversations with them about the house, it seemed to sink in to them that we weren't kidding. They finally began spending more time in their home, and FRIDAY was giving us constant updates on how they were doing. She'd flagged a couple of medical issues that were of note, but Sam and Dean were both remarkably healthy.

Box after box after box arrived at the house for them and sooner than I would have thought their house was furnished and ready for guests. They invited us over for a meal as a thank you and the place looked remarkable. It reflected their taste and personalities, while also remaining comfortable and welcoming to anyone. Sam dragged Steve and I up to see his library, which looked incredible. He'd organized all of Bobby's books, and there was still room for more. I had the feeling most flea markets and online booksellers were about to have Hurricane Sam blow through.

As June wound down, I was working in the barn with the horses when FRIDAY alerted me on my phone via text: Sam is looking for you. He wants to talk about the thing you mentioned when they first arrived.

I grinned and told her to tell him I was in the horse barn. About fifteen minutes later, I heard him come in and I stuck an arm out of Voin's stall so he would know where I was. Once Sam got to the stall he asked, "Horses?"

"Horses. This one helped me come out of my shell more than anything else. Natalia wanted one, and she found someone who needed a home for this guy. He was abused, so he needed a gentle touch. Apparently I was just the right person for the job. Then, the same guy called again and we got Nashel. She was abandoned, but beautiful nonetheless, and helped bring this one out of his shell. I haven't gotten any calls about horses since then, but I know the man we got them from has put the word out that if someone needed help with a tough horse, they could call me."

"Wow. That's very special, Bucky. What was it that you wanted to talk to me about?" he asked.

"We had FRIDAY dig into yours and Dean's records, and I found out that you went to Stanford on a full scholarship?"

"I did," he answered.

"Did you love it?"

"At the time I thought I did, but looking back, I wasn't happy. I was in a fight with my brother, and Jess was a cheap stand-in," his sullen voice answered.

"What about now?"

"What about now what?"

"If you could go back to school, would you?" I asked.

He paused and I watched him think about it. "I don't know. At Stanford I was pre-Law, but I don't know if I could do that now."

"Let's leave Stanford out of this. If you could go back to school and study anything you wanted, would you?" I pressed.

"I think so?"

"Why are you not sure?" I continued.

"I don't know. I thought school meant being done with hunting and I fear that if I go to school something similar to what happened at Stanford might happen again."

"Understandable. Again, ignore possible outcomes. Do you want to go back to school?" I was pushing him because there was more here than I think he knew.

"Yeah. More than anything. I want to keep learning."

I grinned and said, "Amazing. Steve and I are both students at UPenn, and before you moved in, I had Steve go and see the Dean of the College of Arts and Sciences. They're willing to allow you to take a test to see where you stand for any of their Graduate programs, in addition to accepting you for this upcoming semester. If they don't have something you want, we can look elsewhere, but that's an option for you."

Sam's face was slack with shock. I couldn't help the laugh that escaped, because I knew he didn't expect this at all. He continued to stare at me and I just continued to work on Voin, letting the peace of being with my horse wash over me.

Sam's voice broke the silence with, "Holy shit. Are you serious?"

"Deadly. HYDRA is going to fund this too, so whatever you want, you can do."

"Really?" he squeaked.

"Really."

"Dean too?" he asked.

"If and/or when he wants to, of course."

"Wow, Bucky, I'm not sure I know how to respond."

"Don't. Go put on clothes you don't care about and come help me with the barn and the homestead for a while. It'll help you clear your head and process."


	66. Chapter 66

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beginning my headcannon that Dean could be a wonderful jewelry designer and maker.

It took Sam about a week to get back to me, and when he did, it was with a big grin on his face and an enthusiastic YES. I grinned right back and asked, "Talk to Dean about it?"

"Yeah," he answered, "And he wholly approves. I tried convincing him to pick something to study too, but he clammed up on me."

"We'll get Darcy on him. No one can say no to her. By the way, at some point, this week, or very soon, Steve and FRIDAY want to see you in the Med suite. There's nothing super pressing, but there are a few things that have FRIDAY concerned, and Steve is about the closest thing you're going to get to a doctor around here unless you want us to call the GP who we work with."

He nodded. I shooed him off so I could continue working, but I asked, "FRIDAY, can you tell Steve that Sam is probably going to come and see him in a bit?"

"Of course, James."

"Also, tell Darcy to speak with Dean about school. I don't think he'll listen to any of us."

"Sure."

I went back to business and continued to process everything that was going on in my life. Everything had really slowed down after we got into our groove with the kids, and after the Winchesters settled in, everything seemed to mellow out a lot. Because of that, I had been thinking about asking Steve, Natalia, and Darcy to marry me. As it rolled around in my head I realized I knew I was already going to do it, but I needed the perfect rings. Based on what little I knew of Dean, I had the feeling he had a talent for not only engineering but if he put his mind to it, I bet he could create some beautiful jewelry. But I wasn't going to pressure him, because I could tell this transition was taking its toll on him more than it was on Sam. It then dawned on me that there was someone that Dean could talk to who would keep his secrets and understand what was going on.

I quickly grabbed my phone to call Sam Wilson, and he picked up on the second ring with, "Hello?"

"Hey, it's Bucky."

"Hey, man. What's up?" he asked.

"Nothing much. Look, I need to ask you a weird favor."

"Sure. What can I do?"

"I have a friend who is transitioning out of a life long career and needs some advice. Along with probably PTSD to rival them all, he's really struggling with this," I explained, trying not to go into more detail than that.

There was some silence on the other end of the phone, and then Wilson asked, "Are you calling me about Steve?"

I laughed out loud and said, "No! Steve's been seeing Annie forever now. We've got another friend, but I don't think he'd be comfortable talking with any old therapist. The things he's seen are probably worse than some of the things I've seen and I don't take that lightly. He'd barely talk to his own brother, let alone someone who does this professionally."

"Then why the hell do you think he'd talk to me?" he asked.

"Because you're a counselor. I think the thing that freaks him out is the doctor of it all. He's avoided the med suite like the plague and I have a feeling the only time he's ever been to a doctor is if there was a life-threatening emergency, and most likely it wasn't his."

"Brother?"

"Got it in one," I replied.

Wilson sighed and said, "Fine. Is now a good time to come down?"

"Sure. We don't have much going on and I think you'll like the Winchesters."

"Winchesters?"

"My friends. Sam and Dean Winchester. Brothers."

"Hm. Okay. I'll check in with JARVIS and see what's going on. I'll text you."

"Awesome. Thank you, Sam."

"Not a problem, Bucky. I'll be out there by lunch probably."


	67. Chapter 67

A few hours later, FRIDAY notified me that the quinjet was landing, so I headed out to greet Wilson. As I was heading over there, I noticed Sam coming up with me, and when we both arrived at the pad, I said, "I think you'll like Sam."

"Well, we share a name, so that's already a good start."

I chuckled and when the ramp came down and Wilson exited the plane, he had a smile on his face, and then his eyes wandered a little and stopped short at Sam. They widened and he approached and said, "Wow. I've met some people in my life, but none as tall as you."

Sam laughed and said, "Sam Winchester."

Wilson smiled and replied, "Sam Wilson. I think from here on out it's going to be Wilson when we're together because that shit is too confusing."

"I agree, and if you called Winchester, two people would answer, one of whom wouldn't be happy to hear you calling him that."

"And I would assume that someone is not you?" Wilson asked.

"Yeah. My brother, Dean. Hates being called by our last name because it reminds him of our dad."

"He serve?"

Sam smiled and replied, "Yeah. Vietnam. Was never really able to leave it behind."

I interjected, "Okay, before you tell him your life story, let's go inside so Wilson can meet your brother and see Steve, Natalia, Darcy, and the kids."

We all trooped back to the house, where Dean was hanging out with everyone in the living room. When we walked in, the kids popped up and rushed Wilson for hugs, and everyone was grinning. Dean looked a little cautious, but it seemed to dawn on him that if everyone else was fine with it, then there wasn't really anything to worry about. He approached and held out his hand with, "Dean Winchester."

"Sam Wilson, but for all intents and purposes, it will be Wilson while I'm here."

Dean nodded and retreated to the kitchen. Wilson glanced at me and I could see in his eyes that he knew why I had called. I grabbed Sam and brought him to our deck, where the sun was shining, but also we were alone for a moment. I asked, "Do you think Dean would give Wilson a chance?"

Sam looked perplexed and asked, "A chance for what?"

"Sorry. Context matters. When everything went down with Insight in DC, Steve and Natalia recruited Wilson. Former Para-rescue, Falcon pilot, and VA Counselor. He's done a lot of good helping me out and I think he might be good for Dean because he's not actually a doctor. He's actually a person, who happens to have a little experience with this kind of stuff."

Sam paused and I could see the thoughts rolling through his brain. "Is he good at keeping secrets?"

"Of course. He's an Avenger. He took Steve's shield."

"You think he could be trusted with the complete story of our lives?" he asked.

"Well, he handled Steve and Natalia showing up at his doorstep one morning covered in ash saying, 'Everyone we know is trying to kill us,' so I have a feeling that monsters and demons won't really phase him, but then again, I can't say for sure," I explained, having heard the story from Wilson himself, complete with descriptions of Steve and Natalia looking like little puppies at his door.

Sam smiled and said, "Alright. Dean is going to fight him every step of the way."

"I think Wilson might just be the right person for the job. He handled Steve and no one does stubborn like Steven Grant Rogers."

"Well, then I guess it's time to set him loose."


	68. Chapter 68

**Steve POV**

When Sam and Bucky came back in from the porch, I could see the determination in Sam's eyes. I had the feeling that Wilson was about to have his mind blown like we all had when we first met the Winchesters. I wasn't sure how he would take it, but I had to have a little faith in Wilson, after what we'd put him through with Insight. If he could handle that and becoming an Avenger, I think he might be able to handle this too. But then again, I couldn't say for sure.

Sam grabbed a few bottles of harder liquor from our stores, two glasses, and Wilson, bringing him out onto the porch. I watched them both and slowly watched Wilson's face drop in shock, and then go white with fear. As Sam continued to talk, Wilson seemed to get paler and paler, the horror dawning on his face. It took about an hour, but when Sam was finished, he passed Wilson a full glass and it was finished within moments. Sam poured out a few more, and then Wilson seemed to calm down a little.

Sam got up, leaving Wilson with the bottle and came back inside. I decided it was probably my turn to talk to him because it was technically my fault he was in this mess in the first place. I caught Bucky's eye and nodded toward the porch and I got an answering nod back. I grabbed a fresh beer and headed out there to find Wilson performing a masterful thousand-yard stare. I sat down next to him and just waited. He would talk when he was ready. It took him about a half an hour, but he finally said, "I am utterly shocked that he is as well adjusted as he is."

I small chuckle made its way out of me, but I replied, "Yeah. I get the feeling Sam Winchester has a lot inside. But even if he doesn't, Dean has enough for the both of them. You think you can help?"

"I don't know man. Veterans, that's one thing. This sounds like something that I'm not quite equipped to handle."

"I don't think Bucky would have called you if he thought you couldn't handle it. Besides, I think Dean is just like every other soldier you've ever worked with coming back home. He doesn't know what to do now that his job is over, and he's floundering. Plus the PTSD and the terrible childhood, I think you might be just the thing he needs."

There was a deep sigh and then finally, "I'll see what I can do. But don't get your hopes up."

I grinned and said, "Thanks. I'll send him out now."

"No. I need some time to process this and I'd like a day to settle in. I'll find him and we'll talk."

\--

The following morning, Wilson wandered down the stairs looking like death warmed over. He sat silently at the breakfast bar and inhaled his coffee as if it had life-giving effects. He shuffled back into the guest room and didn't come back out until lunch, looking much better and a little less hungover. Dean kept eyeing Wilson like he was some sort of enemy, but Wilson took it in stride, knowing the mistrust and pain Dean was dealing with. Dean left the house after eating and Wilson quickly finished. He asked quietly where Dean was heading, and FRIDAY told him Dean was headed to the gym to get a workout in. Wilson's face fell because he knew he was in no state to be working out, but he got up and headed there without complaint.

\--

By the time dinner rolled around, Wilson and Dean had not returned. I asked FRIDAY if everything was okay, and she told me that everything was fine and if anything happened, she would let me know. As I served dinner, Wilson and Dean were missing, but they'd come when they were ready. We all tried to ignore the fact that they were gone, but dinner was a subdued affair. Everyone pitched in to help clean up and by the time we were done, the sun was almost all the way down and they still weren't back yet. It was hard not to worry, but we all continued with our evening routines.

At around 10:30, just as I was about to put my book down and go to sleep, FRIDAY said, "Steve, Mr. Wilson is asking for you. He and Dean are in the gym. Mr. Wilson requested food as well."

I gave FRIDAY my acknowledgment and headed down to grab the leftovers from dinner and go to the gym. When I arrived, I saw Dean and Wilson sitting in the center of the sparring area. Dean looked like he'd been hit by a bus, and Wilson really didn't look much better. As I got closer, I could see the blotchy redness of Dean's skin, along with the shiny wetness of fresh tears. I stopped outside of the area and passed over the food by sliding it on the floor, along with silverware. Wilson looked up and he had a sad look on his face. He grabbed the leftovers and handed them to Dean without a word. Dean fell on them like a starving man, and faster than I would have expected, they were gone. Dean finally looked up and when he saw me, his face shut down into a blank mask.

I smiled and said, "You don't have to hide your pain around here, Dean."

He stared at me for a while and then said, "Sammy can't see me like this."

I rolled my eyes and said, "Yes he can. Dean, you don't need to keep up this machismo act. It's utter bullshit and we can all see right through you. I know it wasn't easy for you growing up, having to be everything for Sam, but at this point in your relationship, don't you think it's time for him to be able to see who you really are?"

Almost inaudibly, Dean muttered, "He won't love me anymore."

"Are you fucking serious?" I shouted, "That man has loved you all of your natural-born life. He loved you even when you put him through some utter bullshit and you know it. He loved you when you sold your soul for him. He loved you when he found out what happened to you in hell. You think allowing him to see that you're a thinking, feeling, loving human being is going to make him love you less? I get the feeling it will only make him love you more. You don't have to be a robot anymore Dean. You can be a real person. Just a guy who gets to live a real-life with a real family and good honest friends. Isn't that something you want?"

"Yeah, Steve. I want that more than anything in the world. But I don't think I'm cut out for it."

"And how the hell would you know that?" I asked, voice softer, but no less vehement.

"Because I have to protect Sammy. I have to. It's been my job for his whole life. It was the first order my dad ever gave me."

"Well if I could find your dad and hit him in the face repeatedly, I would. That asshole should not have put that on you. He should have been the one responsible for both you and Sam. He should have allowed you both to grow up with a loving family, and if he wasn't willing to do that, he should have left you with someone who would. I don't give a rats ass if he taught you everything or nothing, but that dick abused you, Dean, and his pain is not yours. Sam is a grown-ass man, and you did a fabulous job raising him, despite the circumstances you found yourself in. But you need to start letting go of the shit that other people put in there. It takes real work, Dean, but I know that you can do it. You have to let go of the voice that sounds like your dad, telling you that your only job and your only worth is watching out for Sam. You have to let go of the voice that tells you you're just a grunt. I've seen the way Sam talks about you. I've seen the way Bucky, Natasha, Darcy, and the kids are around you. Wanda wouldn't accept just anyone. She can see into you, down to the core of you. You're a good person, Dean."

His eyes were wide with unshed tears, and I couldn't help myself anymore. I climbed into the sparring ring and approached slowly. When I reached him, I pulled him into a hug and I could feel the wall breaking that he had put up. He was bawling, hemorrhaging pain and suffering. I looked over his shoulder at Wilson and his eyes were wide. I held onto Dean tightly for a while and after about half an hour, he calmed down a little bit and pulled away. His face was shiny with tears and bright red from the exertion. Wilson passed me a water bottle and I opened it and handed it to Dean. He drank it within minutes and when he was calmed all the way down, he looked at me and asked, "What the hell am I supposed to do?"

I smiled sadly and replied, "First, you're going to go home and hug Sam. He's worried about you. You don't have to talk to him if you don't want to, but I think it might be a good thing. In the morning, I'm going to call Dr. Annie Miller, the therapist Bucky and I have been seeing for a while. Would you like me to fill her in on your actual history, or give her the fake story?"

Dean's face lost all color in an instant and he looked at me with sheer terror. I added, "She's signed all of the NDA's, so she can't tell anyone about us. She's also military, so she doesn't have a nonsense bone in her body. I think it might be really helpful. If you don't want to go that route, that's fine too. Darcy, Nat, Bucky, or I would be happy to listen."

Wilson added, "Me too, Dean. But I think a professional is the right way to go."

He looked between the two of us and finally replied, "Let me think about it? I'm tired and want to go to bed."

"Of course," I answered. "Let's get you back to Sam and we'll continue this conversation later."


	69. Chapter 69

The following morning, I decided to sleep in because I didn't have classes. When I woke up, Nat and Bucky were out and Darcy was working with the kids on their school work. We'd been getting them caught up and ready to go to school, and they were soaking everything up like little sponges. I checked in with Wilson and he didn't look much better then he did when I had left him the night before. He looked like he'd been hit by a double-decker bus and then slammed into a building a few times. He told me he'd be fine, he just needed a little time to recover. I nodded and left him alone, knowing he'd recover as long as he had some time to get used to everything. Wilson was a solid person, but he often needed time to process.

I wandered down to the kitchen to find Sam sitting at the breakfast bar. He looked up at my entrance and I said, "Hey."

"Hey," he replied.

I poured myself a cup of coffee and sat down next to him. He waited for a few moments before saying, "I don't know what you did with Dean, but whatever it was, thank you."

"Not a problem, Sam. We all really like you both and could tell he was struggling. He just needs some time to get those dumb voices out of his head."

Sam nodded and stood up to go back to his own home. Before he left I said, "Sam?"

"Hm?"

"Ever think about going into therapy?"

He smiled and replied, "If I did, I would have done it already. I've already made peace with my life, Steve. I know who I am and I don't have a lot of delusions about how my life has been up to this point. If I need to talk to someone, I can find someone on my own."

I nodded and let him go, thinking about how different Sam and Dean were. They were like yin and yang, and I had a feeling if pressed, that Sam could switch from calm and rational, to angry and irrational in a heartbeat. But, for the moment everything was good.

\--

Later that afternoon, when I was working on a sketch, FRIDAY called with, "Steve? Dean is looking for you."

"Send him here, FRIDAY."

Five minutes later, there was a knock at the door and Dean walked in. I smiled and said, "What's up?"

I could see he was still a little fragile, and his voice was soft when he asked, "You still willing to call this woman?"

"Of course. That wasn't a time-dependent thing, Dean. You could have waited a year and I still would have done it."

He seemed to deflate and he sat down in one of my office chairs. I asked, "Do you want to be here when I do it?"

He seemed to think about it and then he nodded. I added, "Now?"

He nodded again and I picked up the phone and called Annie. She picked up with, "Hey, Steve."

"Hey, Annie. How are you?"

"I'm great, Steve, how are you?" she replied.

"I'm okay. I'm actually calling on behalf of a friend. I can't really tell you much, because it's not my story to tell, but I think you might be really helpful to him. Is it alright for me to give him your number?"

"Of course. Any friend of yours is welcome to call. Tell them to do the same thing you did with Bucky," she replied, smile in her voice.

"Sure. I can't tell you when he'll call, but I think he'll prove interesting."

"Well, with you superheroes, my job is never boring, that's for sure," she joked.

"Not my job anymore, Annie. He'll call you when he's ready, okay?"

"Certainly, Steve. Anything else I can do for you?" she asked.

"Nope, that's all. We'll talk at our regularly scheduled hour."

"Yep. Nice to talk with you, Steve," she replied.

We hung up the phone and I wrote down the office number and grabbed the copy of Annie's file I had on hand. Dean looked at me and I said, "I know how your brain works, Dean. You need to vet her yourself. Bucky was the same way. I kept a copy of her file on hand."

He nodded mutely and whispered, "Thanks."

"Not a problem, Dean."

**Dean POV**

About a week after Steve had given me Dr. Annie Miller's phone number and informational file, I knew what I had to do. I grabbed my new phone, complete with anti-tracking and anti-hacking software, courtesy of one Tony Stark, and dialed the number. The phone rang twice before a perky voice answered the phone. I said, "Uh, yeah. I'm a friend of Steve Rogers'? He told me to call and tell you that."

"Oh! Sure. I'll put you through to Dr. Miller right away."

The phone switched to hold music for a little bit and I tried not to roll my eyes. I had strong feelings about music, and hold music was the type that drove me the craziest. But sooner than I would have thought, a voice picked up with, "This is Dr. Miller."

"Yeah, hi. This is Steve's friend?" I asked, voice unsure.

"Ah. And does Steve's friend have a name?" the doctor asked.

"Dean. Dean Winchester."

"Well, Mr. Winchester--"

"--Dean, please. Mr. Winchester was my dad."

"Of course," she responded, "Dean. Thank you so much for calling. How are you doing today?"

"I'm alright."

"Well, that's good. What can I do for you today?" she asked, voice even.

"I honestly don't know. Steve recommended you and I couldn't really find a reason not to call. I need some help, but I don't have the best track record with reaching out for what I need."

There was a slight pause on the other end of the line, but she finally answered with, "Well, I'm so glad you reached out. That's often the hardest part of this whole process, so I'm proud of you for taking the first step. Can you tell me a little bit about yourself?"

I paused, thinking about how best to tell this woman about the shit show that was my life. I answered, "You won't believe me."

"Dean," she intoned, seriousness lacing her tone, "I work with the former Captain America and his best friend the Winter Soldier. I don't know if there's much that can shock me anymore."

I chuckled darkly, no humor in my tone, and answered, "I think we'll have to agree to disagree on that one. Did Steve tell you anything?"

"Not a thing, Dean. He's not the type to break someone's confidence like that."

"Yeah, I figured. I'm a hunter," I told her.

"A hunter?" she asked, confusion lacing her tone.

"Yeah."

I could practically feel the suspicion rolling through the phone line when she said, "I get the feeling there's something you're leaving out, Dean."

"Damn, I thought I'd be able to sneak by. I'm not a game hunter. I'm a monster hunter."

"Monster hunter?" she asked.

"Yeah. Any legend you've ever heard of is real, and people like me help protect normal people."

"Well, that's certainly not what I expected, but that's a very noble profession, Dean," she said, tone even.

I was shocked. Monsters were quite a revelation to most, so it made no sense how she was being so calm. Before I could censor myself, I blurted, "How are you so calm?"

"Dean, my job isn't about the ins and outs of your job. My job is about helping you to understand and work through the trauma that you have incurred in your life. Whether a soldier, a regular civilian, or even an apparent monster hunter, we all suffer and my job is to help you slay the monsters that live in your head. I'm sure you're great at your job, but I have a feeling you've never given much thought to the monsters that exist within you."

"Yeah, we Winchesters were never known for our ability to be self-reflective."

She chuckled and said, "Most people aren't. Why don't you give me a basic outline of what has happened to you, and we'll go from there."

I took a deep breath, steeling myself for something I'd never planned on. "When I was four years old, my house burnt down and killed my mom. My dad was so heartbroken, he became obsessed with finding the thing that had murdered my mom and the love of his life. He knew it wasn't human because it had yellow eyes. My brother Sam was only six months old at the time, and my dad wasn't able to care for a baby on his own, so I was big brother, mother, and father to a six-month-old, at only four years old myself. Once my dad found out about monsters, he became obsessed even more. He traversed the country with us, hunting things and saving people. Until a few months ago, that's all I ever knew. Moving from place to place, motel to motel, with nothing more than a GED and a give 'em hell attitude. Sam had always hated the life. He wanted out for as long as I can remember, and he got his chance. He applied and got into Stanford on a full ride at eighteen. When he broke the news to me and Dad, he was basically disowned. Dad said if he walked out that door, he wasn't his son anymore. I was so shocked I didn't even do anything and Sam assumed I agreed with Dad. I didn't want to bother Sam, so I stayed away for about four years and continued to hunt on my own.

"But then my dad went on a hunt and didn't come back. I got worried, so I went to find Sam and ask him for help. At first, he didn't want anything to do with me, but I begged him and he came on one hunt with me. We went on a hunt that Dad had been working. I returned him to Stanford within a few days, and minutes after I dropped him off, his building was on fire and I was dragging him out of another burning building. The same thing that had happened to our mom, happened to Sam's girlfriend, Jessica. He was out of his mind with rage and grief, so he came hunting with me and we continued our search for our dad. After about a year, we found him, and he was getting closer to the yellow-eyed demon that had killed our mom and Jessica.

"We were working together on a hunt when a demon smashed into us in a semi-truck. Sam and Dad were okay, but I was pretty close to death. In order to save me, my dad made a deal with the demon who had killed his wife, for my life. Most people get ten years when they make deals with demons, but my dad got minutes. Before he died, he told me that I needed to save Sam, and if I couldn't do that, I would have to kill him. Moments later, he dropped dead. Sam and I continued to hunt, finding cases on our own, now that Dad was dead. Throughout this whole time, Sam had been having weird visions and headaches, along with a little telekinesis and other weird abilities. I was a little scared of him, but he's my brother and I wasn't going to hate him for something that he seemingly had no control over. About a year after dad's death, Sam was kidnapped and taken to a ghost town in Cold Oak, South Dakota. Turns out ours wasn't the only home that burned in a fire when a baby was six months old. The Yellow-Eyed Demon was looking for someone to lead a demon army that would be released from a hell gate in Wyoming. It turned out that Sam's abilities were coming from demon blood that the Yellow-Eyed Demon had dripped into his mouth. All of the kids had powers, and when there were only two of them left, our friend Bobby and I arrived and Sam was stabbed in the back and killed.

"I couldn't live with myself, so I did the only logical thing I could do at the time and made a deal with a demon for Sam's life. I also didn't get the normal ten years most people get, because I was special. I got a year to live, and I was happy with that, as long as Sam was okay. When he woke up, we went to Wyoming to try and prevent the hell gate from being opened. We didn't make it in time, but we prevented a lot of damage and killed the Yellow-Eyed Demon and the young man who had murdered Sam. After that, Sam found out about my deal and for the next year, he did everything he could to try and save me, but nothing worked. A year later, my time was up and the hellhounds came and dragged my soul to hell.

"What Sam and I didn't know at the time, was that we were a part of something much more fucked up. Everyone had us right where we were supposed to be. I was in hell, being tortured within an inch of my life, and Sam was up here, drowning in his grief. He was the perfect target to be manipulated by a demon, and he fell for it hook, line, and sinker. She got him addicted to demon blood, which increased his abilities and allowed him to perform amazing feats. Four months after I was dragged down to hell, I came back, seemingly intact. Sam and I were both stunned because we'd never heard of someone coming back from the dead before. But we found out that the thing that had gotten me out of there was an Angel by the name of Castiel. Cas rescued me from hell, but he didn't do it out of the goodness of his heart. It turns out that Sam and I were pawns in a game much bigger than we ever thought. In hell, time moves much slower. So while it only was four months for Sam, for me it was forty long years. For thirty of them, I held out under torture that I will never tell anyone about. Every day, my torturer would ask if I was willing to torture others in order to get off the rack. For thirty years, I said no, but something snapped in me and one day I finally said yes. For ten years I ripped souls apart, moving closer and closer to becoming a demon.

"But Cas rescued me on orders from Heaven because I was the Righteous Man. In Revelation, it is written that the first seal on Lucifer's cage will be broken when 'the righteous man sheds blood in hell.' Well, apparently I was that righteous man. Cas rescued me because the Angels were seemingly trying to prevent the cage from being opened. But, it turned out that both the Angels and the Demons were working together to bring Armageddon. My brother was being manipulated so he would kill Lillith, Lucifer's first wife, and the final seal on his cage. I wasn't happy, but Sam is my brother and the only thing I had in my life, so I eventually forgave him. After Lucifer was freed, we found out that something even worse was on the horizon for Sammy and me. We were destined to be the vessels for Lucifer and Michael, respectively. We were going to have to fight each other to the death. But, right before we killed Ruby, she said that Sam hadn't needed the feather to fly, and she was right. Sam's abilities continued to grow, so much so that we were willing to face down Lucifer and Michael, without giving either of them permission to possess us. We ended up putting Lucifer back in the cage and G-d brought all of the angels back to Heaven, except for our friend Cas. He'd learned a lot in the two years since he'd rescued me and I think G-d was proud of him for being willing to fall from grace, literally, for Sam and I. Crowley, a Crossroads Demon we worked with on the Apocalypse took over hell and closed up all of the rabbit holes where demons could get out.

"Once we all settled back into things after the Apocalypse was averted, Sam and I went back to hunting like normal. For five years or so, we worked just like we had as kids. Motel to motel, hand to mouth, pool hustling, and credit card fraud. But, in a stroke of luck, we ran into Natasha when we were working a case here and that's how we met them. Once we took care of the case, we headed to our friend Bobby's place in South Dakota. Steve said some things to me while we were here that made me think about a lot, and I decided it was time for me to lay down my weapons and come home. We made a clean break from the job, burning all identities we wouldn't need and telling Bobby not to call unless it was a genuine emergency. After we were done at Bobby's we took a long road trip, using the time to clean out storage units Dad had taken out and saying a few goodbyes to people and places we'd known throughout our lives. We made a pit stop in Palo Alto to say a final goodbye to Jessica and stopped along the way. We landed at Steve's about five months later and they had built us a house on their land. We've been here ever since."

There was a long pause on the other end of the phone and I feared I had scared her away, but about a minute later, she said, "Well, Dean. That is quite a life."

"You believe me?" I asked.

"Doesn't matter whether I believe it or not--"

"--Don't patronize me. You think I'm crazy."

"We're all a little crazy, Dean," she answered.

"Me more than most," I muttered.

"You've been through a lot, Dean. And it genuinely doesn't matter whether I believe your story or not. The story and the details don't really matter. Yes, they matter to you, but that's because you lived them. What I'm picking up on are the general traumas that you experienced. The first being your mom and the fire, then having to raise Sam all on your own while being a kid yourself, dealing with a father who wasn't there for you, a life that no child should ever have to live, not to mention the abuse, torture, and responsibility on your shoulders after you found Sam again. Dean, whether your story is true or not, I can help you with the pain that you're in. But, I don't think we should start on any of that today. Why don't we schedule a time to talk, and we can start then."

I hesitated just slightly and said, "Uh, sure."

"Is there something you want to tell me, Dean?"

"Well, kinda. Because of how we were raised, Sam and I have ended up in a relationship."

Another pause and I was freaked. Before I could spiral, she asked, "Is it consensual?"

"Of course!" I exclaimed.

"Are you both happy in that relationship?" she continued.

"I think so."

"You're not planning on having kids?" she added.

"I don't know about you, Doc, but I've never met a man who could have kids."

She chuckled and said, "I know, but I had to check. Dean, what you do in the privacy of your bedroom isn't my business, unless you're hurting someone else or yourself. As long as both you and Sam are happy in your relationship, I couldn't care less who you bang."


	70. Chapter 70

After six weeks of seeing Annie (she insisted I call her that) twice a week, I was beginning to realize why Sam talked so much about therapy. It was freeing to be able to tell someone anything and everything and to begin working through the mountain of shit that had been my life before meeting Natasha and her family. One thing Annie recommended was that I begin looking into things that I wanted to do. I'd been hesitant to do anything before because I was terrified of losing it all. But in speaking with Annie, she made me realize that living in fear wasn't really living and that while it was easy to remain in my own little cocoon, I would have to come out at some point, and I no longer needed the protection that I had spent so long building. Plus, it improved Sam and I's relationship by an incredible amount. I felt freer, and I felt better expressing myself, which meant that we were communicating better than we had in our whole lives.

I settled into our den one afternoon, opening up my laptop to begin doing research. I'd been thinking about taking some classes at a local community college and wanted to do some research on the subject. My search led me all over, but I realized it wouldn't be nearly as complicated as I thought, and if I wanted to, I could take some other classes too. I looked into options that I had and something that immediately caught my attention was the jewelry making classes. For my whole life, I'd always been fascinated by the design of things that people wore, and if I could, I would have worn more of it, but dad was a bit of an asshole about that kind of stuff. Even if he'd wear an anti-possession charm, he hated when I started wearing jewelry more and more. But I was in my rebellious phase, and even if it wasn't as grand as Sam's ever was, I still didn't really give a flying fuck. After Sam left, I calmed down a lot and wore less and less as time went on. Ever since I hadn't worn a piece with any sort of regularity. But as I thought about it, I realized that I'd like to start, and I'd like to start designing and making my own stuff to wear and for other people to wear.

That sent me down another rabbit hole, but I found something that sounded really interesting, and it made me excited to begin exploring the possibilities. As my research continued, I missed Sam coming home from an afternoon out and was nearly startled out of my seat when he came into the room. He sat down and asked, "Everything going okay?"

"Yeah. I'm looking into options for classes I want to take."

"Yeah?" he asked, smile wide.

"Mm-hm. I think it's time I did something. I know I'm late for this school year, but I'd like to do a little reading up and see what I can discover before I start. With FRIDAY's help, I think we could make something work. Plus, with the money Bucky stole, we're set."

Sam was grinning at me like a lune, and I couldn't help but grin back. He asked, "What program?"

"I'll start with a BFA in Metals/Jewelry/CAD-CAM with Entrepreneurial Studies. If I like it, I'll do the MFA."

Sam paused and watched me, finally saying, "Huh."

"What?"

"Nothing," he replied, "Just not what I would have expected."

"Yeah, I know. You remember when we were growing up and I started wearing all of that jewelry?" I asked.

"And dad was furious with you over it?"

"Yup. I've been missing wearing pieces. Not only is it a great way to protect, but it's also a really nice way to express yourself. I've always been good at making things with my hands, and I think it will be nice to make things that have the potential to be protective and also beautiful, rather than destructive and ugly," I explained, trying to be open about everything.

"Well, whatever you decide, I think you'll kill it. And whenever you're ready, do what you need to do to feel prepared. I'm not here to make a judgment."

"Thanks, Sammy. I think I'm going to talk to Steve and Bucky about it to get their opinions," I explained.

He was still grinning at me and said, "Amazing. I have a feeling if this all works out that Bucky might ask you to make engagement rings for him."

My eyes widened and I asked, "Really? He's going to ask?"

"I don't know, I just have a feeling."

"I'll trust that."

**Bucky POV**

As my third year of Vet school was about to begin, I was so proud of the way that Dean was progressing. He'd finally settled into his life, and it seemed like he was way calmer than he had been. One afternoon, just before classes started, he came to see me while I was working on the horses. I was in Nashel's stall, so I stuck out an arm so he could find me. He approached and asked, "You got a minute?"

"For you, I have two," I commented, a grin on my face.

He chuckled and said, "Haha. You're just the funniest."

"What can I do for you, Dean?"

"I wanted to get your opinion on something. I've been looking into stuff I want to study, maybe, and I've found a program at Temple University," he answered, voice shy.

"Yeah? What's the program?" I asked curiosity piqued.

"Metal and Jewelry," he answered.

I grinned and said, "I had a feeling if you thought about it, you might make an excellent jeweler."

"Really?" he asked, voice soft with disbelief.

"Yeah. I saw how you cared for that beautiful car you drive, but you also have a head for design and mechanics. While jewelry is a little more artistic than you're used to, I think you'll kill it. And whenever you feel ready, I'd be honored if you would be willing to make me matching engagement rings."

Dean went white in the face and I asked, "You good?"

He laughed faintly and replied, "Yeah. I should have learned by now to not doubt Sam."

I chuckled and carried on. I noticed Dean shift and he finally asked, "I'd like to begin working on separate studio space for myself. I love the garage Tony so graciously provided, but I'd like this space to be different."

"Go wild. FRIDAY can help you, and anything you need to order, go for it. I might recommend waiting until you have some training under your belt, but you do you, Dean."

"Thanks. I am also going to enroll in some classes at the community college, so I'm not going in blind."

"You do you, Dean. We'll be here to support you with whatever you need," he replied, voice kind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Should I stop here and make a sequel? I'm not sure and I feel like this has come to a good stopping place. Thoughts?


	71. Chapter 71

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was thinking of making a sequel, but I changed my mind. So here you are. :)

**Steve POV**

People often say that the only consistent thing about life is that it is inconsistent. But I'm not sure I agree with that. Two years after Dean started talking to Annie, and things hadn't really changed much around the homestead. I was working through the last bits of Medical School, Bucky was about to start his final year of Vet School, Sam was going into his third year of his Ph.D. in Religious Studies, and Dean was about to start his second year of BFA in Metal/Jewelry. Nat still loved her job with the PD, and Darcy had really flourished being effectively a stay-at-home mom to the kids, who were now nine, and going to school like normal kids. They had flourished under our care and were turning into amazing human beings.

The homestead continued to flourish as well, all of us pitching in to let it continue to grow. We hadn't added anything since we stopped with our livestock, but now that things had really evened out, we were finally looking into a few more options, including beekeeping and aquaponics. But we had to do a lot of research on those topics, so we were holding off until we all had some time to really dive deep. Bucky had become the real caretaker of the homestead and he loved it. He took care of everything like a champion and it was a complete turn on to see him covered in sweat after a hard day's work on the farm. The animals loved him and he continued to love them and love working in the garden.

In addition to finishing out Vet School, Bucky had been working on his animal rescue plans. We had a big spot in front of the house that we weren't going to use for anything, so we decided that it would be a good spot for the rescue and clinic. Bucky had also begun putting the word out that he was planning on starting an animal rescue in about a year. He'd spoken with the guy we adopted our horses from, and we were promised that as soon as Bucky let him know, he'd have people to reach out to, in order to inform them of Bucky's business. We felt lucky that we had the funds we needed in order to run a clinic without much trouble. The six of us had discussed the idea of bringing people in to help out at the clinic, and Bucky was considering reaching out to a few people from his program to help, but we were still trying to decide what would work. We were pretty far away from the city, so we wanted to make sure it would work for anyone we hired. We figured at least one of them could stay in the apartment in the horse barn, but we would need to make some additional changes if we wanted to hire more than one person. But that was for the future. Right now, we were just in the planning stages.

When it came down to it, we were all happy. It was something that I hadn't expected to find, but when it dawned on me that everything was okay and things were working out like they were meant to, the grin on my face couldn't be wiped off. Everyone else found it a little creepy, but I was too thrilled with my epiphany to care. Life was good.

\--

Bucky POV

As I began my final year of Vet school, I realized I had been waiting far too long to ask Steve, Natalia, and Darcy to marry me. One afternoon, before classes began, I approached Dean. He stared at me for a few minutes, and then said, "Stay right there. I'm going to bring you some designs and you'll let me know what you like."

I stared back at him, dumbfounded, and when he returned with a sketchbook he said, "You told me you wanted this when I was just starting my classes. Plus, Sam reminded me. And you had a look in your eyes that told me you were ready. Come, take a look and let me know what tickles your fancy."

I settled down and began flipping through the pages of Dean's book. It was filled to the brim with beautiful designs for beautiful jewelry, and I was thrilled with the idea that we would all get custom jewelry from Dean. As I flipped through I noticed that there were usually only three rings in each design family, so I asked, "Why three?"

"In my experience, the person asking doesn't usually wear a ring. If you want one, I can design you one similar to Steve's."

"I'd like that."

He nodded and prodded me to continue flipping through the pages until I found a design that I liked. Once I did, I got more and more excited. Dean promised that they'd be ready by the holidays at the latest, which made me excited about the prospect of proposing.

\--

When the time came, it was early December and we were beginning to decorate the house for the holidays. When we adopted Wanda and Pietro, we weren't really told what their religious practice was, and for all of us, we were never really observant. My mother was Catholic, so I grew up practicing that, but since waking up, my faith had really left me. The same was true for Steve, who grew up in an Irish Catholic home. Nat was indoctrinated to believe the religion was stupid, and even after her breaking free, she seemed to agree with that one. When Darcy came into our lives she was the first person to ever express a religious leaning. She was proudly Jewish and introduced us to many special traditions. One of which was lighting the Menorah and celebrating Chanukah. This year, we decked out the house in decorations, Darcy taking over the majority of the work, and on the final night of celebration, after the menorah was lit, blessings were sung, and presents opened, I glanced at Dean and caught his eye and gave him a gentle nod. The kids were standing next to Sam, watching with interest. Dean passed me a ring box, which contained all three rings. I knelt down and asked, "Darcy Anne Lewis, my darling, will you marry me?"

Her eyes were wide with shock, hands clasped over her mouth, and she nodded. I stood up and placed the custom ring on her finger. She stared at it for a moment before launching herself into my arms. I hugged her tightly, and I whispered, "I need to do Steve and Natalia." She released me and I moved down to Natalia. I knelt again, box one ring lighter, asking, "Natalia Alianovna Romanova, my spider, will you marry me?"

She was white in the face, but I could tell it was from shock, not fear. She nodded mutely, and I stood up and placed the custom ring on her finger. I pulled her into my arms and hugged her tight. She returned the gesture and I could feel her trembling just a little. I released her so I could move to Steve. I knelt for the final time, now two rings lighter, and asked, "Steven Grant Rogers, my little Stevie, will you marry me?"

He nodded without a moment's hesitation and I got up and pushed the ring onto his finger. He grinned like a lunatic and hugged me tightly. When we separated, Dean was holding out another box to the three of them and without missing a beat, Natalia grabbed it and the three of them knelt down, and Darcy asked, "James Buchanan Barnes, my love, will you marry me?"

Then Natalia, "James, my soldier, will you marry me?"

And finally, Steve, "James Buchanan Barnes, my Bucky, will you marry me?"

I could feel my throat tightening with emotion, so I just simply nodded and the three of them pushed the ring onto my finger. I was grinning from ear to ear and happiness oozed through the room. Our little bubble was shattered by Wanda shouting, "Finally! I thought you were never going to ask."

I laughed at that, and the twins ran over and we hugged both of them. Dean moved to stand by Sam and they watched on.


	72. Chapter 72

**Nat POV**

Being engaged was amazing. It was nice to have a reminder of the fact that the four of us were going to be together for the rest of our lives. It took a little negotiating, but we agreed that when we went to get marriage licenses and take care of all the legal paperwork, that James and I would be getting married and Steve and Darcy would be getting married. When we had our ceremony at home, that was when we would pledge ourselves to each other as a foursome. It was just easier that way.

As the year ended and January came fast and furious, we agreed we would be going to the courthouse midway through February. We didn't want to waste any time getting things legally squared away, and that was the soonest the six of us were available. Sam and Dean were going to join us as witnesses and they were just as excited as we were. When we got to the courthouse, I could feel the butterflies in my stomach and I couldn't seem to calm down. I never saw this as a possibility in my life, and now as it was staring me in the face, I couldn't get it together. James could tell I was nervous, so he held my hand and made sure I was as calm as I could be.

We went through the motions, and about an hour later, we walked out of the courthouse legally married. I decided not to take James's name, but he thought it would be interesting to take mine, so he was legally now James Buchanan Barnes-Romanoff. It made me grin with a sense of possession whenever I thought about that, but I had to try and reign it in because I didn't own James and no one ever would again. (James had gotten himself squared away legally with Tony's help. It was actually simpler than I thought it would be.) Darcy was a bit more of a traditionalist, so she took Steve's name in addition to her own, now being Darcy Anne Lewis-Rogers. Steve looked like someone had given him the sun and it was infectious.

When we got back to the house, we quickly sent out invitations to all of the people who mattered. It was going to be all of the Avengers, (Tony, Bruce, Thor, Clint, Rhodey, and Wilson), plus Sam, Dean, Laura, and the kids. We were happy that it was going to be a simple affair because we didn't want to make a big deal out of it. It mattered to us, and we hoped it mattered to all of the people we invited, but we didn't want to be so ostentatious. We set the date for the first time we were all free over the summer, me needing to take a month's leave in order to make time for the ceremony and the honeymoon we were planning.

\--

When June finally came around, excitement hung heavy in the air. Steve had finished med school, and we knew we were going to be cutting it close with his residency, but we wanted to have our ceremony. We'd discussed it between the four of us and we agreed we wanted Sam to perform the ceremony. We knew he would make it very special for us and create a memorable moment for us. Darcy and I had been shopping separately for wedding clothing, neither of us wanting anyone to know what we were wearing. Time marched on, and we all got more and more excited.

When the day finally arrived, all of our guests arrived pretty early in the morning. The four of us were resolutely staying away from each other, so Laura was in charge of introducing the Avengers to Sam and Dean. The kids were running around the yard, not a care in the world. Sam seemed a little nervous, but that was just his personality. He wanted everything to be perfect, and human beings were decidedly not perfect. At about noon, Sam called for everyone's attention, and they clumped into a group and shuffled off so we had the room. We agreed we would be walking to where the main part of the ceremony was happening individually, wanting the experience of seeing each other walk down the aisle. Steve went first, and I wished I could see him, but FRIDAY was blacking out the windows so we wouldn't ruin the surprise. James was next, and while I couldn't see a thing, I had a feeling that the two of them were already crying.

I went next, grabbing my bouquet and making my way out. I had decided on a white pair of cigarette pants, and a white corset-like top. It was see-through over my stomach and back, covering up my chest. I had a jacket on standby for when the night got cooler, but I forewent it for the ceremony. I felt more like myself without it, and I needed that. I watched as Steve and James's jaws hit the floor and I couldn't keep the grin off my face. Laura met me at the end of my walk, and I happily handed my flowers off to her. She grinned and gave me a big hug and I took my place next to Steve and James. Both of them looked very sexy in their suits. Steve had decided on a deep blue suit, a crisp white shirt, and a simple light blue tie. The suit was tailored perfectly, fitting impressively over his large frame. James had decided to go with a little more flair, his black suit having embroidery over the sleeves and the back of the jacket. His blood-red shirt popped against his skin and he'd decided to forego a tie. He looked a little bit like a vampire, but I wouldn't deny that it looked sexy.

Once I took my place, it was Darcy's turn, and seeing her was a shock. Apparently, she was going for something a little sexier than I was expecting. She'd decided on a sheer lace dress with a low back. I was expecting her to choose something a little more conservative, but she looked like a bombshell in it. Also, rather than white, she'd decided on blush, which complimented her skin and made her glow. She handed off her flowers to Dean and joined the three of us. I glanced at Steve and James, whose expressions were utterly stunned. Their eyes were wide and they couldn't take their eyes off Darcy. She grinned and I couldn't help the laugh I let out. That seemed to break the moment, and everyone settled down.

Sam began speaking, "Ladies and gentlemen, we are gathered here today to join Steve, James, Natasha, and Darcy in marriage. Their love spans one hundred years, wars, espionage, and even space. But at the heart of it, are four people who love each other, and have faith in one another. Their story isn't an easy one, but the love they share knows no bounds. Before they exchange vows, they agreed to something a little different. I gave each of them a candle before they walked down the aisle, and I am going to light each of them." He did so, continuing, "Now, the four of them are going to light this large pillar candle, expressing the joining of their lives from the four of them individually, to one joined life."

We all leaned over and lit the pillar candle as one, and the flame that was there shone brightly. We blew out our individual candles and watched as the flame flickered proudly. Sam continued, "Steven Grant Rogers, do you take these three people to be your partners? Through all troubles? Through good times and bad? With no judgment? With faith and pride?"

Steve's smile was beaming as he said, "I do."

"James Buchanan Barnes-Romanoff, do you take these three people to be your partners? Through all troubles? Through good times and bad? With no judgment? With faith and pride?"

James's eyes were filled with tears, but he answered, "You bet I do."

"Natalia Alianovna Romanova, do you take these three people to be your partners? Through all troubles? Through good times and bad? With no judgment? With faith and pride?"

I tried my best to keep my face even as I answered, "я делаю." (I do.)

"Darcy Anne Lewis-Rogers, do you take these three people to be your partners? Through all troubles? Through good times and bad? With no judgment? With faith and pride?"

Darcy grinned like a dork and replied, "Hell yes."

Everyone laughed and Sam continued, "So, as there are four of them and they already have rings on their fingers, my partner has made them each matching rings. Their engagement rings are all slightly different, but these four are identical in every way, shape, and form." He pulled out a box from his pocket and opened it, showing the four identical rings. They were white gold, and they had four large diamonds set in the metal. On both sides of the four stones was one small diamond, representing the kids. On the inside of the ring was a Celtic knot, symbolizing our eternal love for each other. We agreed we would all put on our own rings. We each took the one that was ours and as one, we put them on.

Once that was done, Sam added, "I don't have any power vested in me by anyone, but you're married now. Kiss each other and then we'll party."

Everyone laughed out loud and the four of us shared a hug. When we parted, everyone had moved a little bit and we joined hands and moved toward where we were going to be having a meal and dancing into the night. 


End file.
